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Author Topic: Dealing with Depression ~ A Personal Point of View  (Read 102175 times)

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Offline Athos

Re: Dealing with Depression ~ A Personal Point of View
« Reply #75 on: April 01, 2011, 11:45:42 AM »
*hugs Rhedyn* We got you covered, darling. I know that you'll make it through the darkness and back into the light, even if we all have to grab a limb and carry you. Then we'll all find ourselves on a beach somewhere drinking mojitos and relaxing in the sun...damn this is starting to sound good. All humor aside though I'm here if you need anything, just give me a shout.

Offline Sybl

Re: Dealing with Depression ~ A Personal Point of View
« Reply #76 on: April 01, 2011, 12:23:16 PM »
I think today is going to be a very difficult day for me. It set in again last night when I climbed into bed and sat in the dark...nothing but sadness and tears. I was hoping it would be gone when I woke up, that a new day would help, but it hasn't. I'm still sad and still crying for no reason. I just want to give up and push everyone away, but I'm trying really hard not to because I know it won't help, it will just make me feel worse.

Will I ever live without feeling like this? I want the light again and all the happiness it brings.

Rhedyn,

one thing I have learned this past week, and will share.  We cry, for a reason.
It may be unknown to us at the time the tears come.

My therapist shared this with me also when we feel that alone-ness:

left hand to right shoulder, right hand to left shoulder, squeeze.
You have been hugged..
Consider this hugs from all of us, for you, gathering around you,
we may not be there (with each other)physically, yet in spirit, we are.
I believe we all need to try to remember, that we share this common bond.

You are loved. And needed.

Sybl

Offline Oreo

Re: Dealing with Depression ~ A Personal Point of View
« Reply #77 on: April 01, 2011, 02:04:39 PM »
smiles softly and hugs tenderly and this too shall pass. We are all here until the light returns.

Offline monicaclassycoed

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Re: Dealing with Depression ~ A Personal Point of View
« Reply #78 on: April 01, 2011, 11:08:35 PM »


Something is bothering me in both a good and bad way and I was wondering if any of you have an opinion. I get very happy or sad based on what happens here at E. When I am involved in a satisfying partnership in a roleplay I am doing good...if not I feel so lonely and depressed. Don't get me wrong, real life impacts me as well, but it seems with my vivid imagination I have sort of created 2 lives. One online and another off. The one off is going ok in terms of academic success, but I have a very hard time keeping boyfriends and I get sad about it. Also the news in general just depresses me to no end. I feel like I have no future because the USA is on the decline...and growing worse daily.  Online has been interesting here. I have met some wonderful men and some not so wonderful...lol. I would like to meet a woman as well, preferably someone to join in with me and a male in a scenario. I get the feeling it's easier to meet guys here. Anyway I am not making much sense IMO...sorta drifting around. I have found that on E..unlike real life...my preference for older partners is easier to find and I like that alot. I think my desire for older comes from a deep seeded need for approval and appreciation and older people tend to have the ability to cater to my needs better than my peers. I'm weird but I dont want to change.

Offline Athos

Re: Dealing with Depression ~ A Personal Point of View
« Reply #79 on: April 02, 2011, 12:40:00 AM »

Something is bothering me in both a good and bad way and I was wondering if any of you have an opinion. I get very happy or sad based on what happens here at E. When I am involved in a satisfying partnership in a roleplay I am doing good...if not I feel so lonely and depressed. Don't get me wrong, real life impacts me as well, but it seems with my vivid imagination I have sort of created 2 lives. One online and another off. The one off is going ok in terms of academic success, but I have a very hard time keeping boyfriends and I get sad about it. Also the news in general just depresses me to no end. I feel like I have no future because the USA is on the decline...and growing worse daily.  Online has been interesting here. I have met some wonderful men and some not so wonderful...lol. I would like to meet a woman as well, preferably someone to join in with me and a male in a scenario. I get the feeling it's easier to meet guys here. Anyway I am not making much sense IMO...sorta drifting around. I have found that on E..unlike real life...my preference for older partners is easier to find and I like that alot. I think my desire for older comes from a deep seeded need for approval and appreciation and older people tend to have the ability to cater to my needs better than my peers. I'm weird but I dont want to change.


I have to admit to having a rather extensive experience with what you describe. Iíve been RPing in various online communities since I was 14 and Iíve had issues over the years with becoming overly emotionally involved in it.

For me, it has been a choice between living in the real world where I struggled with overwhelming shyness and insecurity, and interacting online with a group of people who gave me a sense of acceptance that Iíd never had. Given those circumstances I would find it hard to blame anyone for not wanting to immerse themselves as deeply into the second option as possible. So I did, to the point of spending more hours in the day on the computer than anywhere else, and becoming so emotionally involved in its happenings that it affected me enough to reduce me to tears, and worse.

Now Iím not saying that all (or any) of this applies to you, since I donít know you. But, if it does then I would caution you to keep yourself as grounded in the real world as you can. Thereís nothing wrong with making friends and participating in an online community like E, nothing at all. I have to admit that Iíve never really seen a community quite like E. Itís truly one of a kind. But, if you start using it as an escape from a world that may seem overwhelming, frightening and bleak, then youíre going to miss out on a lot of really wonderful things that canít be experienced via the internet. Itís true, these are hard times to live in with the economy and political situations the way they are, but if you sidestep those issues instead of doing what you can make things better you may always feel like something is missing.

Hmm, upon rereading the essay that I ended up writing in response, Iím not sure how much of this is advice for you and how much is advice for me. Right now Iím thinking its more the second, but hopefully some of this may end up being relevant. :D

Offline RhedynTopic starter

Re: Dealing with Depression ~ A Personal Point of View
« Reply #80 on: April 04, 2011, 04:54:25 AM »
*accepts and returns all the offered hugs*

Thank you all, to know youíre all here and around for support is such a big boost. I apologise for my late replyÖI needed a few days to really take a break and get grounded again. Iím feeling much better now, more of a short sharp burst of it. Iím not even sure what set it off in the first place.

I donít know about the rest of you but I always feel kind of foolish once I come out of my slumps for being so melodramatic while Iím in them but I know itís good for me to share it and have it there for me to look back over and put into perspective when I come out of it.

I agree with you Athos in your response to monica, Iím rather sensitive and have in the past been known to throw myself in and get overly emotionally involved in things, letting them take over my life at timesÖit only ends up getting your fingers burned in the process but I can completely understand why it happens. I have learnt not to do this over the years though I still slip up at timesÖdonít we all.

I would caution you to keep yourself as grounded in the real world as you can.

This is very, very important to doÖnot just with reference to online activities but to any form of escapism, something which, I think, is a part of depression. For me its computer games, something I can do almost automatically without thinking. In fact I find that if Iím not in a down state and I play too much and immerse myself too deeply into something like that then it can trigger my depression much in the way you were describing monica. I think this ultimately comes down to allowing something to rule your life in an addictive sense. You donít even realise itís happening until itís too late and you are too involved.

I try to take the time to have breaks, like my one this weekend. Often I take them too late, when the damage is done and I'm in the slump but Iím really trying to do this more so at the moment as a preventativeÖhopefully it will have a positive effect. When I look back I realise that I didnít really have anything like that happening to me while I was living depression free, which has been food for thought for me right now.

Offline Jated

Re: Dealing with Depression ~ A Personal Point of View
« Reply #81 on: April 22, 2011, 10:20:16 PM »
I deal with depression every day.  To be honest, E has helped me with that.  I feel that I am able to write, and share through my characters.  Makes dealing with the real world feel tolerable.  Thanks for sharing!


Offline Sybl

Re: Dealing with Depression ~ A Personal Point of View
« Reply #82 on: April 23, 2011, 02:08:04 PM »
I deal with depression every day.  To be honest, E has helped me with that.  I feel that I am able to write, and share through my characters.  Makes dealing with the real world feel tolerable.  Thanks for sharing!

I know you will find lots of support here, Jated.
E! has helped me in many ways, the support here, and making new friends, has been a positive experience.

Offline Athos

Re: Dealing with Depression ~ A Personal Point of View
« Reply #83 on: April 23, 2011, 11:25:30 PM »
We're here for you if you ever need anyone to talk to Jated.

Offline RhedynTopic starter

Re: Dealing with Depression ~ A Personal Point of View
« Reply #84 on: April 25, 2011, 04:40:14 AM »
I deal with depression every day.  To be honest, E has helped me with that.  I feel that I am able to write, and share through my characters.  Makes dealing with the real world feel tolerable.  Thanks for sharing!

Thanks for stopping by Jated! I'm going to echo what Sybl and Athos have said, we're around and just a PM away if you need to talk  :-)

Offline loki

Re: Dealing with Depression ~ A Personal Point of View
« Reply #85 on: April 29, 2011, 12:37:00 AM »
I have been reading this thread and been pondering if I should post in it or not now for a while. You see I have to deal with depression as well but I work with stones/crystals and have seen them help with may things, depression being one of them. Now they aren't a fix all to everything and they don't work the instant that you put them on, like meds they take time to help with things, but cost a lot less. lol Anyway for those of whom who would want to try and help themselves with stones, I can name you a few stones that will help. (I make jewelry with the stones myself and sell them, but I believe that anyone who wants the help of the stones should be able to get them anyway they can.)

Okay, now that I have you all either looking at me like I'm crazy or interested,I'll tell you the stones and some info. You can either have a group together or a single stone depending on what you want. The single stones that work well alone are Lepidolite and Turquoise. Both stones at common and Turquoise comes in a lot of different dyes colors (no the dye doesn't effect the stones properties). Now you can either have a single piece or multi of the same piece and it will help with your depression. Now, the multi stones that I am going to list have an order that they need to be in and all work together to help with mood and to give energy. Citrine, Smokey Quartz, Lapis Lazuli, Rose Quartz and Garnet.
The stones in that order work at optimal levels with helping mood stabilizers and energy stones.

Sorry If I hijacked your thread, but I felt that if I posted something about the stones that they might help someone who was willing to give them a try. For those who look at me like I'm crazy, well the worst case is that you have some pretty stones, the best case they help. Anyway, if anyone whats more info from the crazy stone lady you can give me a pm. I hope that I didn't offend anyone and that my words may help someone.

Offline RhedynTopic starter

Re: Dealing with Depression ~ A Personal Point of View
« Reply #86 on: April 29, 2011, 03:08:26 AM »
Welcome loki and thanks for your thoughts. I don't think you're crazy at all! I use stones and crystals too (I'm an energy healer) as well as other more natural alternatives to drugs. The best one I have found for mood lifting and fighting depression is haematite, it works really well and on occasion smokey quartz. The latter is a little softer in its effects but is good when I find my computer time/gaming directly affecting my depression.

Offline loki

Re: Dealing with Depression ~ A Personal Point of View
« Reply #87 on: April 29, 2011, 07:44:35 PM »
Wow, I've never met another healer (other than my husband). I am also an energy healer as well. But I feel the need to tell you that you need to be careful with  Hematite. I have a few stone books and one holds a warning about it. Hematite should not be used where inflammation is present or for long periods of time. Just thought I would give you a heads up, just to be safe.




(side note: I would love to chat with you, Rhedyn about .... things sometime.)

Offline RhedynTopic starter

Re: Dealing with Depression ~ A Personal Point of View
« Reply #88 on: April 30, 2011, 03:04:31 AM »
I've never heard that warning before so thanks for sharing. I tend to work very intuitively with my stones on a person to person basis as I do when I do my hands on healing as some crystals just aren't suited to some people.

I would like that a lot! Feel free to PM me any time or add me on MSN to chat  :-)

Offline Sybl

Re: Dealing with Depression ~ A Personal Point of View
« Reply #89 on: April 30, 2011, 02:49:39 PM »
here I am again, back in the swamp of depression, the questions, the self defeating pit of despair. When will the cycle end? Will it end, the black trap of death looms all around me. Not mine, no that would be too easy. Who knows, maybe I am an attraction to the angel of death? Like a side show freak, I have tried to understand why life thinks it is okay to kill everything and everyone I love. I just want to give up, quit trying, quit feeling. Just stop, stop everything.. there is no sense to my life, it isn't like I am someone important. Just someone who tries to bring goodness, yet in return death swallows up all I care about.

Stupid me, last week I sent what I thought was something nice..to someone through email, not PM. He hasn't spoken to me since. I thought we were friends.. stupid me. Everything I touch eventually rots. I got the call tonight, my sister in law is home, dieing..I love her so much, she has always been an angel of mercy to those around her, she is 43, a wonderful soul, yet she dies, why her? she spent her whole life devoted to those in nursing homes, as a physical therapist, helping everyone, to keep active in one form or another. She has so much to live for, a husband who loves her, cherishes her.. why can't it be me? I am single, no significant other, all my friends are dieing, and I live..why?  they all have someone.......it isn't so hard for the angel of death to find me, I am only 1 person, well, this time, I don't count myself as 2, split or not, we have nothing we would not give up, to save someone who has More right to live.
I used to say life sucks, then you die.. for me, why not? life sucks and I watch those close to me drop off like flies, what did I do to deserve all this death, and not even my own? :'(

Offline RhedynTopic starter

Re: Dealing with Depression ~ A Personal Point of View
« Reply #90 on: April 30, 2011, 05:32:24 PM »
*hugs long and hard*

I'm so sorry to hear that Sybl, sending you much love and positive energy. I truly believe that everyone is important. You are important to us and have us here for you when you need us ...and when you don't...  ;)

Offline Sybl

Re: Dealing with Depression ~ A Personal Point of View
« Reply #91 on: April 30, 2011, 11:21:49 PM »
*hugs long and hard*

I'm so sorry to hear that Sybl, sending you much love and positive energy. I truly believe that everyone is important. You are important to us and have us here for you when you need us ...and when you don't...  ;)

Thank you Rhedyn..
  it means allot really. I guess when you hit that point of despair, nothing looks like it would get better. Sometimes I just feel so alone, and when friends and family get so sick...nothing makes sense.  thanks for the love and positive energy... *hugs you*

Sybl

Offline RhedynTopic starter

Re: Dealing with Depression ~ A Personal Point of View
« Reply #92 on: May 01, 2011, 02:51:01 AM »
I know how that feels all too well *hugs some more*

Offline sinnerangel

Re: Dealing with Depression ~ A Personal Point of View
« Reply #93 on: May 02, 2011, 11:36:56 AM »
Thank you for sharing your feelings.

I've been dealing with depression since 2005. Of course there have been better and worse peroids. Now I feel that I'm slipping into this world of emtiness and despair again. It's like all the colors disappeard and I can't do anything about it. The days are slipping away and out of my hand uncontrollably.


Reading your post and the comments make me feel less alone.

Thank you all

Offline Sybl

Re: Dealing with Depression ~ A Personal Point of View
« Reply #94 on: May 02, 2011, 11:51:39 AM »
Thank you for sharing your feelings.

I've been dealing with depression since 2005. Of course there have been better and worse peroids. Now I feel that I'm slipping into this world of emtiness and despair again. It's like all the colors disappeard and I can't do anything about it. The days are slipping away and out of my hand uncontrollably.


Reading your post and the comments make me feel less alone.

Thank you all

you aren't alone sinnerangel, there are many here ready to be your support, and once you are an approved member feel free to PM me, or any of us here.
We all have that "knowing" understanding.

Sending you good thoughts, and *hugs*

Sybl

Offline Sybl

Re: Dealing with Depression ~ A Personal Point of View
« Reply #95 on: May 03, 2011, 08:14:23 AM »
you aren't alone sinnerangel, there are many here ready to be your support, and IF you become an approved member feel free to PM me, or any of us here.
We all have that "knowing" understanding.

Sending you good thoughts, and *hugs*

Sybl

Sorry Sinnerangel,
 I meant to say if you become an approved member. ( Not being the original starter of this thread......... I couldn't modify my original response )

Offline sinnerangel

Re: Dealing with Depression ~ A Personal Point of View
« Reply #96 on: May 05, 2011, 03:52:47 PM »
Sorry Sinnerangel,
 I meant to say if you become an approved member. ( Not being the original starter of this thread......... I couldn't modify my original response )

Don't worry it's okay . 
I want to thank you for your kind words. I do hope I get accepted and we can get to know each-other better.

Till then: All the best

Offline Jated

Re: Dealing with Depression ~ A Personal Point of View
« Reply #97 on: May 17, 2011, 05:21:57 PM »
To be honest, it is hard facing things sometimes.  I used to hide, hoping that if enough time had passed, it would all go away. I too am a victim of sexual abuse.  Much of my life, up until I turned 18, was revolved around it.  I always thought of myself as an ugly unwanted person.  And if I was wanted, it was just for sex.  No matter if it was or not.  I felt that was all I was good for.  The earliest I can remember, I was being touched, around the age of 2.  I know people say you can't remember back that far, but all I CAN remember is that.  The day before my 16th birthday I was raped.  We had moved 1000 miles away from our pasts.  Mom wanted the best for us kids, and it seemed as thought we couldn't get away from the abuse.  3 months after moving, the rape happened.  I thought it was all my fault, and ended up moving out of the house at 16.  As hard as it was, I did it, at least for a while.  For years and years, all I could think was, It all has to be my fault.


Anyway, I am here at 37, an age in which I never thought I would make it to.  I am in a wonderful relationship with a beautiful and understanding woman.  I have forgiven all that have hit, touched, fondled, slapped, kicked, swore at, told I was nothing, told I was never supposed to be born....I forgave them all.  It took a while, but I did it. 


Depression.....HELL YEA.  Every minute of every day, I spend battling and I imagine that I will for the rest of my life.  My girl is very special.  One smile from her, makes it go away, at least for a short time.  I do hope that for everyone who does get down and depressed, that you can find a way to make it go away.  Even if for a few moments at first.  Being here in E, takes my mind away, to a special place, where I can write, and be creative.  I always try to be positive, and never negative.  At least, I can say for me... Looking up always feels better than looking down.

Offline RhedynTopic starter

Re: Dealing with Depression ~ A Personal Point of View
« Reply #98 on: May 18, 2011, 03:41:23 AM »
I think we all hide sometimes, I know I do when things feel too difficult to deal with. They never do go away though and eventually facing them is the only thing left to do.

Thank you for sharing with us Jated *offers hugs* I'm so pleased you have found someone special who understands and supports you. As difficult as it can be sometimes looking at things from a positive angle makes a whole world of difference to how we experience things and approach the past things we still have to deal with. Keep looking up  :-)

Offline AndyZ

Re: Dealing with Depression ~ A Personal Point of View
« Reply #99 on: May 18, 2011, 08:15:55 PM »
Been reading through this whenever I felt low.  I have depression also.  Now I'm all cut up, though, and wanted to say hi and that people can talk to me also.

Guess that's all I have to say on it, I guess...I'm not always very good at talking.