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Author Topic: Dealing with Depression ~ A Personal Point of View  (Read 102053 times)

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Offline steele

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Re: Dealing with Depression ~ A Personal Point of View
« Reply #950 on: May 21, 2014, 02:23:29 PM »
Hi every one and this blog is incredible ...
My name is James I was diagnosed and involuntarily retired in 2011 with Parkinsons then upon further review it was updated to Parkinsons plus and the plus is not good . It just means the progression can be up to 10 or 20 x faster. I have since become a group leader/moderator of online support groups that i wont mention here ..but if you send a pm I will provide with a support group for any ailment or fear that you have.
 
I would like to share this with all .. it says alot  ALOT...

Thanks and may whomever you choose to be your higher power . I wish prayers of Solace for all...

The Mayonnaise Jar

When things in your life seem almost too much to handle, when 24 hours in a day is not enough, remember the mayonnaise jar and two cups of coffee.

A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of him.

When the class began, wordlessly, he picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and fills it with golf balls.

He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was.

The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured it into the jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls.

He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was.

The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else.

He asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with a unanimous “YES”¯.

The professor then produced two cups of coffee from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar, effectively filling the empty space between the sand. The students laughed.

“Now,”¯ said the professor, as the laughter subsided, “I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life. The golf balls are the important things - God, family,

children, health, friends, and favorite passions.

Things, that if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full. The pebbles are the things that matter like your job, house, and car. The sand is everything else -- the small stuff.”¯ he said.

“If you put the sand into the jar first,”¯ he continued, “There is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls.

The same goes for life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have room for the things that are

important to you...”¯ he told them.

“So... pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Worship with your family. Play with your children. Take your partner out to dinner.

Spend time with good friends. There will always be time to clean the house and fix the dripping tap. Take care of the golf balls first -- the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand.”¯

One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the coffee represented.

The professor smiled and said, “I'm glad you asked. It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem, there's always room for a couple of cups of coffee with a friend.”¯

Offline Tigataga

Re: Dealing with Depression ~ A Personal Point of View
« Reply #951 on: May 21, 2014, 05:26:16 PM »
I'm very sorry, Tigataga.  My heart goes out to you.  What did the crisis team say?
Not a whole lot really, just tried to calm me down and talk me out of it, which they have.
Honestly, I'm thinking of dropping a lot of stress in my life, involving and including some of my friends. I don't want to talk about it in public, so PM me if you wanna know more/help me decide.

Offline Remiel

Re: Dealing with Depression ~ A Personal Point of View
« Reply #952 on: May 21, 2014, 05:44:02 PM »
Well, for what it's worth, friendships are important to keep, even if it seems like they don't care.

The trick is figuring out who are your real friends and who are just there for appearances' sake.

Best of luck, buddy.  I don't know you, but I can certainly sympathize with your situation.  The way I look at it is this:  in choosing life, you're always leaving the door open for something to change.  You never know the future, after all.  Who knows?  Tomorrow might be the day your life starts to turn around.

But with death, you're closing the door on any potential awesomeness that may have otherwise happened to you.   Best to hang onto hope, then, no?

Offline BAMF

Re: Dealing with Depression ~ A Personal Point of View
« Reply #953 on: May 21, 2014, 06:55:52 PM »
Well, for what it's worth, friendships are important to keep, even if it seems like they don't care.

The trick is figuring out who are your real friends and who are just there for appearances' sake.

Best of luck, buddy.  I don't know you, but I can certainly sympathize with your situation.  The way I look at it is this:  in choosing life, you're always leaving the door open for something to change.  You never know the future, after all.  Who knows?  Tomorrow might be the day your life starts to turn around.

But with death, you're closing the door on any potential awesomeness that may have otherwise happened to you.   Best to hang onto hope, then, no?

Quoted for truth. This is the thought that got me through every single time I've contemplated it. Hang in there. You've got plenty of people rooting for you, even if they are strangers.

Offline Athos

Re: Dealing with Depression ~ A Personal Point of View
« Reply #954 on: May 22, 2014, 12:10:33 AM »
Well, for what it's worth, friendships are important to keep, even if it seems like they don't care.

The trick is figuring out who are your real friends and who are just there for appearances' sake.

Best of luck, buddy.  I don't know you, but I can certainly sympathize with your situation.  The way I look at it is this:  in choosing life, you're always leaving the door open for something to change.  You never know the future, after all.  Who knows?  Tomorrow might be the day your life starts to turn around.

But with death, you're closing the door on any potential awesomeness that may have otherwise happened to you.   Best to hang onto hope, then, no?

I also have to quote this for its truth. As I said in my message to you, of you need to talk I'm always available via PM.

Offline RhedynTopic starter

Re: Dealing with Depression ~ A Personal Point of View
« Reply #955 on: May 22, 2014, 05:32:16 AM »
http://soldmysoulfor.tumblr.com/post/86396296208/more-have-had-to-call-the-crisis-team-been

I'm so sorry you have been in such a dark place Tigataga, it took a lot of strength from you to make that call and reach out for help ~is proud of you~

Hi every one and this blog is incredible ...
My name is James I was diagnosed and involuntarily retired in 2011 with Parkinsons then upon further review it was updated to Parkinsons plus and the plus is not good . It just means the progression can be up to 10 or 20 x faster. I have since become a group leader/moderator of online support groups that i wont mention here ..but if you send a pm I will provide with a support group for any ailment or fear that you have.
 
I would like to share this with all .. it says alot  ALOT...

Thanks and may whomever you choose to be your higher power . I wish prayers of Solace for all...


Thank you and welcome, steele. I've heard that story before but thank you for the reminder of it, it's definitely a message to keep in mind. I'm sorry to hear about your diagnosis, I think it's wonderful that you are investing your time in helping to lead/moderate support groups, they are so very important and helpful.


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Re: Dealing with Depression ~ A Personal Point of View
« Reply #956 on: May 22, 2014, 07:12:19 AM »
I will say that sometimes we have people in our lives that hinder our own recoveries.  Maybe it's that person that we've known since we were kids, who keeps embroiling us so tightly in their problems that we can't focus on our own lives.  Or that relative who makes dismissive comments about what (for us) are massive milestones.  Cutting those people off - the ones that do little more than sap any energy and enthusiasm from our already strained reserves - can be like taking a diseased limb off of a tree. 

Just make sure to keep the healthy ones.

Offline Remiel

Re: Dealing with Depression ~ A Personal Point of View
« Reply #957 on: May 29, 2014, 01:20:38 PM »
Stumbled across this the other day, found it tangentially appropriate.

Starring Harry Shum, Jr, of Glee fame, and narrated by the guy who does the "True Facts About..." videos.


Offline RhedynTopic starter

Re: Dealing with Depression ~ A Personal Point of View
« Reply #958 on: May 29, 2014, 03:20:19 PM »
Oh, great find!

Offline Night Stalker

Re: Dealing with Depression ~ A Personal Point of View
« Reply #959 on: June 05, 2014, 10:34:57 PM »
Leaves Good Thoughts and Hugs for all

Offline CriminalMindsFan

Re: Dealing with Depression ~ A Personal Point of View
« Reply #960 on: June 11, 2014, 10:18:14 PM »
Depression is one reason I began to share stories that I wrote earlier in my life using the web and doing that led me to doing roleplays for the first time in my life. But now problems with roleplays can cause me to suffer on and off depression.

Offline RhedynTopic starter

Re: Dealing with Depression ~ A Personal Point of View
« Reply #961 on: June 12, 2014, 07:54:15 AM »
I'm sorry to hear that, CriminalMindsFan. One of the things I really hate about my depression is how it feels like it takes the things I enjoy and can make them triggers for me.

~offers hugs and leaves more for everyone who visits~

Offline Adammair

Re: Dealing with Depression ~ A Personal Point of View
« Reply #962 on: June 13, 2014, 07:35:49 PM »
it feels like it takes the things I enjoy and can make them triggers for me.

This. Exactly this.

I simply want depression to go away, and to be happy. That's all. But, it's like I don't know what happiness is. Would I recognize it if I was happy? Many people (maybe, most) would say they had a happy childhood. When I think back, I can't honestly say that, since I can't remember a time when I was really happy.

I want to escape from the depression and the negativity, but nothing seems to work anymore. It's almost as though hope is draining from me drop by precious drop, and I can't find the leak, let alone fix it.

*offers warm, friendly hugs to any who want them*

Offline Aislinn

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Re: Dealing with Depression ~ A Personal Point of View
« Reply #963 on: June 13, 2014, 07:46:30 PM »
I've learned over the years that depression is a daily battle. Some days are worse than others. On the days that are bad, it's as if I have to choose to let the depression have me for that day or choose to make something of it.

I freely admit that there are days that I don't have the strength to fight and I give up, but I don't let that trickle over into the next day. If I have a 'down' day, I make a special effort the following day to wake up and actually say out loud " Nope...you had me yesterday. You will -not- have me today. Today I will find something that makes me happy. "

I thought it a bit silly at first but it's worked for me. I find now I have more up days then down days.

~leaves hugs for everyone~

And it's probably a moot point but if anyone every needs someone to talk to, my pm is always available.  ;D

Offline RhedynTopic starter

Re: Dealing with Depression ~ A Personal Point of View
« Reply #964 on: June 14, 2014, 10:31:24 AM »
This. Exactly this.

I simply want depression to go away, and to be happy. That's all. But, it's like I don't know what happiness is. Would I recognize it if I was happy? Many people (maybe, most) would say they had a happy childhood. When I think back, I can't honestly say that, since I can't remember a time when I was really happy.

I want to escape from the depression and the negativity, but nothing seems to work anymore. It's almost as though hope is draining from me drop by precious drop, and I can't find the leak, let alone fix it.

*offers warm, friendly hugs to any who want them*

I found it took me years to recognise my happy days from my down ones. I can usually tell them apart now, particularly if I have a particularly low day followed by a good day. For a long time I couldn't tell the difference, I guess because there wasn't much difference between them. I truly hope that things improve for you Adammair.

~takes some hugs and gives some back~

I've learned over the years that depression is a daily battle. Some days are worse than others. On the days that are bad, it's as if I have to choose to let the depression have me for that day or choose to make something of it.

I freely admit that there are days that I don't have the strength to fight and I give up, but I don't let that trickle over into the next day. If I have a 'down' day, I make a special effort the following day to wake up and actually say out loud " Nope...you had me yesterday. You will -not- have me today. Today I will find something that makes me happy. "

I thought it a bit silly at first but it's worked for me. I find now I have more up days then down days.

~leaves hugs for everyone~

And it's probably a moot point but if anyone every needs someone to talk to, my pm is always available.  ;D

I agree so much that it is a daily battle. Like you there are days I give up, usually because my mind tells me that it won't hurt to just wallow in it for a day. The problem comes from getting back out of it again. I really like how you stand up to it and find the strength to take a more positive hold. One of the things I've been working really hard with doing is making myself look for happiness in my days and gratitude for what I have in my life already. It has helped me a lot.

~grabs some Aislinn hugs too~

Online Conflict

Re: Dealing with Depression ~ A Personal Point of View
« Reply #965 on: June 14, 2014, 11:56:18 AM »
Hello, all. I have been trying a new tactic to combat depression, and it seems to be working wonderfully, so I thought I'd share and see if it helps anyone else.

I have been approaching the problem of sadness from an extremely empirical point of view. I pay the closest attention to my mood, and when it changes, and draw conclusions based on that. For example, I was wallowing in misery one day a couple of weeks ago, when I somehow managed to get up, walk to the kitchen, and make myself dinner. I hadn't eaten all day, and when I had finished the meal, I noticed that my mood was noticeably better. Pretty obvious, right? Well, ever since, when I recognize that I'm down there in that pit, one of my primary strategies is to make myself go make some food, because I know I will be happier after it. It's a logical leap the first couple of times, but I think of it as "If I perform this action, I will feel better." This is one of the simple techniques that I use; there are many others, like piling up my bed with books and other random crap so I have to keep moving and not just lie down.

The idea is to contextualize sadness as a problem, like a logic puzzle or something you're trying to figure out. It's impossible to fight a faceless enemy, but when you have a clearly defined problem and a reason to solve it, the ideas come faster, and you can try and see if they work. It's possible that what I'm describing is nothing but a heavy dose of the placebo effect, but hey, the placebo effect is a tool too. Whatever works.

Anyways, I'm not sure if this will help anyone else, but I think it's worth a shot, to keep some kind of a mood journal and try to pin down what exactly changes your moods. Feel free to PM me if you need to talk or if you think this will help and want more details or something. Good luck to everyone out there, and stay strong.

Offline RhedynTopic starter

Re: Dealing with Depression ~ A Personal Point of View
« Reply #966 on: June 14, 2014, 12:02:21 PM »
I think that's a good approach, Conflict. Thank you for sharing.

I do a similar thing with art. I have to force myself to be creative, usually in my art journal, but it definitely helps. I think a big part of battling depression is finding your triggers. Keeping my art journal has shown me a pattern of behaviour in what has set of my down mood each time. It has certainly been very helpful for me.

Offline CriminalMindsFan

Re: Dealing with Depression ~ A Personal Point of View
« Reply #967 on: June 14, 2014, 04:02:41 PM »
I wish depression was talked about as widely as cancer because I think the world would be better, if more people talked about depression as openly as cancer.

Offline RhedynTopic starter

Re: Dealing with Depression ~ A Personal Point of View
« Reply #968 on: June 15, 2014, 07:10:02 AM »
Absolutely. I do think the topic is beginning to open up more to mainstream discussion, at least it is in the UK. There have been a number of wonderful programs on TV over the last year or so taking a look at depression and opening it up as a talking point headed by numerous people in the public eye. Every little helps, I think, to work some way to banishing the stigma attached to it and helping others who don't know what it is like to understand in some way.

Offline Sarabi

Re: Dealing with Depression ~ A Personal Point of View
« Reply #969 on: June 17, 2014, 01:35:06 AM »
I'm only 29 but feel that my life is coming to a close. I used to be very creative and wanted to be a novelist but depression took all that away. I sleep upwards of 20 hours a day due to not having the motivation to do anything else. Hopefully coming here will change that.

Offline RhedynTopic starter

Re: Dealing with Depression ~ A Personal Point of View
« Reply #970 on: June 17, 2014, 03:42:49 AM »
Welcome, Sarabi. I'm sorry to hear you are going through a rough time with your depression, as you can see there are a lot of us that struggle with it so I hope you can take some sort of comfort in knowing you're not alone. I just wanted to say, as difficult as it is, don't give up on your dreams. I have to force myself to be creative sometimes but doing so really helps me. There will be better times on the horizon, I have faith in that, they can just take a really long time to arrive.

Offline Dirtythesnapper

Re: Dealing with Depression ~ A Personal Point of View
« Reply #971 on: June 18, 2014, 03:40:35 PM »
This. Exactly this.

I simply want depression to go away, and to be happy. That's all. But, it's like I don't know what happiness is. Would I recognize it if I was happy? Many people (maybe, most) would say they had a happy childhood. When I think back, I can't honestly say that, since I can't remember a time when I was really happy.

I want to escape from the depression and the negativity, but nothing seems to work anymore. It's almost as though hope is draining from me drop by precious drop, and I can't find the leak, let alone fix it.

*offers warm, friendly hugs to any who want them*

I feel the same way about my childhood memories. I don't remember the good and the few goods i do remember seem to have a stain on them. My memories are simply a conglomeration of regrets.

I actually ended up on E because of my depression. I never really roleplayed until this year because until this year i always had other supports in place to hold me up against the depression. I don't have most of those supports anymore so i end up on E roleplaying another life to escape my own. If i kept going on i would feel like im whining and complaining so i'll leave it at that.

Offline RhedynTopic starter

Re: Dealing with Depression ~ A Personal Point of View
« Reply #972 on: June 22, 2014, 05:37:53 AM »
~leaves hugs for all~

I had a rough day yesterday, woke up feeling really sad and I just couldn't get away from feeling sleepy.
Today is going better and for that I am grateful.

Offline RhedynTopic starter

Re: Dealing with Depression ~ A Personal Point of View
« Reply #973 on: June 22, 2014, 01:43:03 PM »

Online Oniya

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Re: Dealing with Depression ~ A Personal Point of View
« Reply #974 on: June 22, 2014, 03:37:21 PM »
Blanket forts for the win.

And Nerf guns.  Lots of Nerf guns.  Reba-McIntyre-in-Tremors levels of Nerf guns