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Author Topic: Perverted Wishes  (Read 89480 times)

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Offline BlueEyedBard

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #2350 on: June 21, 2011, 10:17:41 AM »
Granted, and here you go. A real cute guy just posted in the social boards.

I wish to live in a Utopia on Earth

Online Captain Maltese

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #2351 on: June 21, 2011, 01:49:22 PM »
Welcome to the village Zlotjy in Serbia. It's in a valley so deep there's only sunlight an hour per day... in the summer. The main occupation is coaldigging. You have never been outside the village so you are sure it is Utopa.

I wish I owned a Maserati.

Offline elone

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #2352 on: June 21, 2011, 03:31:13 PM »
You have just been delivered a wrecked rusted hulk. But hey, it's a Maserati.

I wish I had more time to spend on Elliquiy.

Offline Davina

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #2353 on: June 24, 2011, 04:05:17 PM »
Sits in your lap effectively pinning you to the spot you're sitting forcing you to spend more time on E!

I wish I had a comfy man to cuddle with and snooze on

Offline Linwood Badr

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #2354 on: June 25, 2011, 10:07:56 PM »
Granted, but he won't let go so you both die from starvation.

I wish I had a photographic memory.

Offline Astrofig

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #2355 on: June 25, 2011, 10:26:03 PM »
Granted--you can now remember everything that has ever happened to you like a photograph, and lose the ability to form any new memories.

I wish I had a desk job.

Offline Fieryone

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #2356 on: June 28, 2011, 12:06:27 PM »
Granted but your boss is a jerk and fires you over a little misunderstanding.

I wish I had a perfect body.

Offline Undeniable Sin

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Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #2357 on: June 28, 2011, 01:15:05 PM »
Granted. Now no one will talk to you or hang out because they are intimidated by your perfection.

 I wish I had a good library in my back yard.

Online Captain Maltese

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #2358 on: June 28, 2011, 01:57:54 PM »
You now have a huge library in your back yard. And it is full of thousands of volumes. All out of date by a decade. Good luck looking for facts.

I wish I had a time portal to the Library of Ancent Alexandria, set to two hours before it was torched.

Offline Fieryone

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #2359 on: June 28, 2011, 04:27:39 PM »
Granted, but do to time difference in travel you arrive just as it goes up in flames.

I wish I had a Starship.

Online Captain Maltese

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #2360 on: June 28, 2011, 04:38:39 PM »
Congratulations. You are now sitting in the pilot seat of the strange ship that was found on a planet at the start of the first Alien movie. And you have been sitting there for a while...

I wish I was a real Captain.

Offline Fieryone

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #2361 on: June 28, 2011, 05:07:29 PM »
Done, but your boat is sinking fast.


I wish I could understand Animals.

Offline Adammair

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #2362 on: June 29, 2011, 06:27:13 AM »
Done, you now understand all animals completely, and realize that your housepets are plotting to kill you in your sleep.

I wish...to win back-stage passes for a meet-and-greet with Def Leppard and Heart at their concert, tonight.

Offline Braioch

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Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #2363 on: June 29, 2011, 06:30:13 AM »
Granted but first you have to 'earn' them :P

I wish I had a self-replenishing source cigarettes >.>

Offline Adammair

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #2364 on: June 29, 2011, 06:33:57 AM »
Granted but first you have to 'earn' them :P

I wish I had a self-replenishing source cigarettes >.>

'Earn them' how...by doing Heart? I might do Heart, depending...

Granted, you have a lifetime supply of self-replenishing candy cigarettes. ;D

Offline Braioch

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Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #2365 on: June 29, 2011, 06:37:21 AM »
You forgot to wish, and also, -.- candy cigarettes do not contain the nicotine necessary to prevent me beating stupid people with the nearest object. :P

I wish I hadn't had insomnia last night

Offline Linwood Badr

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #2366 on: July 16, 2011, 06:04:44 PM »
Granted, you just slept all day instead, missing several fantastic shows of dubious nature outside your house.

I wish I had a small, nice, cute pet.

Offline Adammair

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #2367 on: July 16, 2011, 06:10:21 PM »
Granted! You are now the owner of a small, rabid badger...but it's still nice and cute.

I wish to be surrounded by beautiful women, who serve me wine and sing me songs.

Offline Belle33

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #2368 on: July 16, 2011, 06:15:21 PM »
Granted.  There are four ladies at your beck and call.  And they are considered the most beautiful 90 year olds on this side of the planet.

I wish to be pampered by one of E's sexy men.  And by pampered - I do not mean diapered!

Offline Linwood Badr

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #2369 on: July 17, 2011, 07:31:40 AM »
Granted, unfortunately they get distracted by E, constantly, so instead of pampering you properly, they do as much as they can; when not working, cleaning your house, or walking the dog.

I wish I had the ability to use a technique or spell similar to Naruto's Shadow Clone Justu, so I could get everything I wanted done.

Offline Adammair

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #2370 on: July 17, 2011, 10:48:58 AM »
Granted. A little bit of you is in each Shadow Clone, so you end up with multiple personalities, and you don't remember what needs to get done.

I wish I had the ability to use a technique or spell similar to Naruto's Shadow Clone Jutsu, so I could get everything I wanted done. (You've already gained a clone, Loren. lol)

I'm kidding, of course. What I really wish for is to be able to switch bodies with someone of the opposite gender for one day, to see what it would be like.

Offline Linwood Badr

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #2371 on: July 17, 2011, 12:17:35 PM »
Granted, unfortunately said person has a bit too much fun in your body and other than having several new infractions on your record, you also have a rash where there otte not be.

I wish someone would fix my new personality disorder and still able to keep the shadow clones...

Offline dart

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #2372 on: December 03, 2011, 08:36:00 PM »
granted, You still have all your shadow clones, but now none of you have any personality at all.

I wish I could have the power to become unnoticeable whenever I don't want to be noticed.

Online Zaer Darkwail

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #2373 on: December 12, 2011, 05:15:41 AM »
Wish granted, now the whole world, any, world itself does not notice you. You disappear into alternative reality where is nothing; no time, no space nor atoms. You get stuck in said limbo for just a second and when you return the world has collapsed together and exploded in big bang three times already.

I wish I would get early 13th day access to Old Republic and able play my Sith Warrior earlier than 15th when I would get my game from Game Stop.

Offline Villain

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #2374 on: December 24, 2011, 12:28:48 PM »
Granted but theres a power cut....forever. Enjoy your game

I wish for a white Christmas