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Author Topic: [NC][Seeking More Players Who Want an In-Depth Game!] Burden City  (Read 33032 times)

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Offline Aiden

Re: [NC][Seeking More Players Who Want an In-Depth Game!] Burden City
« Reply #300 on: December 14, 2010, 03:47:44 PM »
Looking forward to those profiles in progress.

The game has not closed recruiting, feel free to drop by the OOC and say hello and browse our subsection.  XD

Offline Prototype

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Re: [NC][Seeking More Players Who Want an In-Depth Game!] Burden City
« Reply #301 on: December 14, 2010, 07:15:23 PM »
So now that I am accepted I wish to have some RP which is more adult oriented. :) This would be the character that I would wish to play and this seemed to be the most fitting roleplay to start with for some reason. ^^ Hopefully this character is good enough. Thank you.<
( Check On's and Off's in Signature )

Act I. The Profile
Birth Name: Keleseth Delmoore
Name: Keleseth
Alias: 'Shade'
Age: 25
Sex: Male
Orientation: Heterosexual
Profession: Acquires information from the crime world, hands them over to the Detective or sells it for the highest bidder depending on the situation and the information.
Role: Investigator undercover as a criminal, or perhaps more of a criminal than an investigator depending on the situation.
Alignment: Chaotic Neutral

Act II. The Diagnostics
Height: 176 Cm
Weight: 76 Kg
Hair: Short dark brown.
Eyes: Dark green
Skin: Tan white.
Birth Mark: Few on his upper chest and back.
Tattoos: He has tribal fashioned tattoo on his right shoulder. ( Image )
Distinguishable Mark/Scar: Over his neck there is a scar of a cut running from under his ear till his left shoulder, had an accident.
Model: Keanu Reeves

Act III. The Dossier
Likes: Information, subtlety, perfect job, money, red wine, vodka, smoking, precision.
Dislikes: Arrogance, hypocrisy, betrayal, drug addicts, his stepfather.
Attitude: Keleseth tends to keep away from most conflicts, staring from a far and dislikes to draw too much attention. Usually the guy in the dark table in the back of the bar, or the man who walks away when fight breaks loose. He is neutral in most cases, and is ready to watch or even kill an innocent in order to stay under cover. His personal intentions are unknown, but he does double dealing between the crime lord and detective staying in the gray area and is rather unpredictable.
Habit/Twitch: He tends to smoke allot or always have a drink between his fingers, sometimes talks to himself and taps the tips of his fingers against the table when sitting.
Quote: " The only thing I regret about killing you, is that I can only do it once. "

Weapons

9mm with silencer, usually holstered and hidden on his belt which is covered by his long black coat.


Bullet proof vest under the coat and a black long sleeved shirt to hide it.


Fiberwire mostly used to strangulate and remove a threat quietly. The wire is thin yet strong which makes it easy to force breathing to stop.


Tylenol, a sedative that knocks the person out and puts them to deep sleep a fast acting drug needed for self defense or other reasons depending on the situation.


A pair of handcuffs.


History:

Keleseth Delmoore or 'Shade' was born in a poor family, father was a drunkard and mother had to spend most of the time on the work to pay the rent and so the 'family' would have food on the table. Leaving young Keleseth alone or on the streets. From a young age he already had walked around with the wrong types, stealing, breaking and generally causing trouble trough out the city with his young friends.

At the age of sixteen he had joined a street gang, he had ran from his home and settled near his friend never really seeing his family as those who cared about them choosing the street life among his friends in his hood they were a trouble to anyone who tried to restrict their freedom. Still young and naive he sunk deeper and deeper into his new direction of life.

At the age of eighteen the street gang had developed far enough that they were stealing larger properties such as car radios, cars themselves, went into empty houses and emptied them to sell what ever they could take and buying drugs, alcohol and occasionally taking whores from the big city. Though they didn't see that their lives were going down hill, crimes got bigger and they got more bold going for tougher and harder places to empty they had become a major problem trough the small neighbourhood.

At the age of nineteen they decided that it was time to hit the city, they got themselves some guns and masks. Thinking that it was time to go for a bank so they formed a plan having the get away car, guns, ammunition. Having some contacts with the crime lord it wasn't hard to acquire, they promised twenty five percent of the cut if they pulled it off. The job however went horribly wrong as they were catched after a shootout, Keleseth was lucky to survive and decided to give himself in. For the next five years he was in a prison, seeing the horrible life that went on there, he felt like he was thrown into hell yet he wasn't a weakling, not agreeing to take a beating and being reduced to nothing but dust he stepped against those who tried to make him their personal slave, he had earned respect and acquired quite a much of information over the past five years.

One day he was taken to a meeting with the detective, and offered a job to go under cover, earn his freedom back by working for them and finding out all the information he could. Apparently the guards had overheard some conversations and it was known that Keleseth had information that would be useful, not being directly in contact with the Crime Lord he wasn't really known to anyone and would had been a perfect bite to see who is behind all the rising chaos, to gain evidence and enough information to take them all down. Keleseth had no choice, and any chance to get out from the hellhole he was going to take it. Agreeing to work for them he received a brief training how to use guns and certain weapons at his disposal, pretty much thrown out and told that he would bring every bit of info back, and that escaping them would be a foolish thing to do.

« Last Edit: December 15, 2010, 12:06:42 AM by Prototype »

Offline AngelsDemonsCode

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Re: [NC][Seeking More Players Who Want an In-Depth Game!] Burden City
« Reply #302 on: December 14, 2010, 11:54:57 PM »
Prototype, welcome to Burden City.

Offline Prototype

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Re: [NC][Seeking More Players Who Want an In-Depth Game!] Burden City
« Reply #303 on: December 15, 2010, 12:00:15 AM »
Is this approved? Or must I wait for a GM to approve?

Edit: As it seems you are a GM haha, my mistake. :)
« Last Edit: December 15, 2010, 12:05:07 AM by Prototype »

Offline Aiden

Re: [NC][Seeking More Players Who Want an In-Depth Game!] Burden City
« Reply #304 on: December 15, 2010, 01:38:21 PM »
Welcome to the game Prototype, feel free to ask any questions if you have any. I know my character can use someone who sells information.

Offline AngelsDemonsCode

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Re: [NC][Seeking More Players Who Want an In-Depth Game!] Burden City
« Reply #305 on: December 22, 2010, 12:47:59 AM »
Act I. The Profile


Birth Name: Theolinus Jason Wendell.

Name: Theo Wendell.

Alias: Bad Angel.
 
Age: 29-years-old (Current) and 26 to 30-years-old (Apparent).

Sex: Male.

Orientation: Heterosexual.

Profession: Indebted Bodyguard.
 
Role: Criminal.

Specialty: Con Man.

Alignment: Crime Lord.



Act II. The Diagnostics

Height: 6 feet and 2 inches.

Weight: 207 pounds.

Hair: Blonde, cropped and styled in a professional but trendy fashion.

Eyes: Dark brown.

Skin: Rather pale complexion.

Birth Mark: N/A.

Tattoos: One large angel wings tattoo that start from his shoulder blades and stops at the ends of his flanks. He plans to have a tattoo of this picture of Margaret Asher, his current ‘service’ and crush, between the shoulder blades.

Distinguishable Mark/Scar: N/A.



Act III. The Dossier

Likes: His job, and that seems to be it, in the eyes of everyone that sees him at work or on breaks. He likes to plan, organize, think and dream of his job and what to do the next day. He likes organization and neatness in his life. His criminal life as well since it's the only life he knows of after all these years. He also like going to church and attending daily mass. Volunteering at Shared Burden every Sunday (his rest day, as the Bible states it should be) and helping those in need. The Crime Lord, whoever they are, since they're keeping some form of order to Burden City's criminal underworld. Hard work and diligence evident in other criminals' works so it shows they actually had to work for their items. Theo likes being useful as possible to anyone that he is working with and vice versa.

Theo enjoys his work getting done and the results being good but he receives far more pleasure from staying in anonymity and people not knowing his identity. Theo’s memories of his adopted parent, Father Michael Wendell Vincent Hill. His religion, as noted before, is a big like of his. Though he’s unwilling to say it now, due to complications, he is slowly starting to like Margaret Asher. The woman he has been assigned to take care of due to a debt he owes to Luca Ludwig, a friend/coworker of his. He likes how quiet and tranquil she seems to be. He also likes activities that makes him think and use his brain. (As in crosswords, sudoku or anything like those.) A good meal and non-alcoholic drink isn't something he won't turn down either. It's unknown what his sexual pleasures are though.
 
Dislikes: Anything that makes him steer off his current path or distract him too long. This includes alcohol consumption, risk taking, outdoing, drug taking and the other 'fun' activities the Criminals seem to be doing these days due to the high rolling life they live in Burden City. He dislikes unnecessary noise. (Believing there's 'constructive noise' and mere 'noise'.) He isn't interested in rubbing elbows, so to speak, with other people. He hates glory hounds who do whatever they can to get attention even if it means someone gets hurt. He dislikes touchy feely people or anyone that can’t take ‘no’ for an answer when he seriously means it. Criminals who have no sense of morals or a set of rules, meaning they just do whatever they please and not think of the consequences of it, also earn his ire here.

People who bad mouths or mocks the Lord whether or not they know about his religious side. Anyone that mocks him for his beliefs and they know that he doesn’t like that. Making a mistake in his plans or unable to go through with something due to something inane or ridiculous. He also hates Luca's blatant misuse of Margaret's trust and sleeping with other women and Margaret's utter devotion to someone who seems to care little for her well being. Theo does not like it when someone attempting to persuade him from the Crime Lord's side on the basis she/he is doing more harm than good. Someone attempting to blackmail him and they don't even have a favor they need paid back from him and someone refusing to let him pay a debt since he is a man of his words and hates to leave things unfinished.

Attitude: A man of few words and even fewer noticeable gestures, Theo isn’t the talkative, suave, aggressive or socially charming as most people envision con people to be. Nor the womanizing, sly talking con man that Luca perpetuates in his own brand of work. He has slight contempt for Luca’s shenanigans or anyone that encourages that stereotype but doesn’t out right hate show boaters like Luca. Instead he has still has a deep respect for people like him but likes to do his own thing due to him being more of a lone wolf type of guy. That and he find the jokes and cracks unneeded and simply distracting from the job. While he’s willing to work with others just as long it is as it is – work. He doesn’t like small talk during a job and only tolerates Luca’s because he’s known the man for a long time.

He is surprisingly religious, due to his early upbringing, and refuses to say the Lord’s name in vain and dislikes anyone who does it around his presence and knows it. He is loyal and generous to those he feels like deserves it but will not hesitate to deliver swift retribution to those who wronged him. He is a man that enjoys silence and long bouts of solitude to himself though a casual conversation with someone he trusts isn’t something he won’t mind. He can be approachable and amiable when he desires to be but doesn’t do that a lot of times in order to keep people out of his heart and to avoid weakness. Though he doesn’t believe in the ‘Law of the Jungle’ or ‘Winner Takes All’ motto the other criminals has, he keeps himself on his toes and ready for anything at all times. When he finds something that he likes, he will really like it. He will become obsessive over it though he won't admit to that. He'll do whatever it takes to get that one thing he wants, short of killing or outright stealing it. This applies to both non-living things and living things.

Theo is also a man of his word and will repay any debt he made for a person. Be it from a few seconds ago or a few years back, he’ll repay it in equal measure due to his sense of honor. While this has gotten him in some hot water every once and a while, he is willing carry out what the person wants him to do. He has a strong sense of honor and justice and will not tolerate anyone trying to say otherwise. He can be selfish and rough like anyone but he attempts to control it to the best of his abilities. But he is, deep down in the end, still a confused kid that simply forced himself to grow up and toughen up when the only person who cared for him died. He is still a bit confused and lost so he attempts to hide it with his other aspects of personality and shield himself from anyone's attempts to take advantage and hurt him.

Because of this, he is a bit romanticist and likes to fantasize of impossible things or things that he wishes to happen. He can become depressed or despondent at a drop of a hat for some reason but quickly forces himself to suck it up and move on. He may seem robotic or cold at first glance due to him being so proper and stern but he still has feelings. It's just he simply attempts to hide it and in turn attempts to find something -a connection to anything- that will make him feel like his life was worth something after all these years. It may explain why he hasn't had sex for a while or even bothered to attempt to make contact with other people, wanting something more special than just quick sex but his high standards and admittedly cold nature makes it difficult to communicate with him.

Habit/Twitch: Scratches the back of his neck when flustered and averts his eyes when he's trying to talk to someone that he likes.

Quote: "I know I'm like a machine but I still have dreams."

Weapons:

Guns:

Two Beretta 96 (15 rounds per magazine. Keeps two magazines on him at all times and carries them on him on the back of his belt.)

Bersa Thunder 380 (8 rounds per magazine. Keeps a magazine on him at all times and carries them on him through an ankle holster but only uses it when on a ‘job’. Will not use it when he is a civilian.)

Hand-to-Hand:

Garrotte (Keeps in pocket, carries it with him at all times.)

Throwing knives (Three knives per use. Keeps strapped on a shoulder holster but only uses it when on a ‘job’. Will not use it when he is a civilian.)

Two knuckle duster knives. (Hides it in his pants pockets and carries them at all times)

Chemicals:

None.

History: During a snow storm in New York in 1981, December 24 to be exact, an unknown woman abandoned her infant child on the steps of a Catholic church. The residing priest there, Father Michael Wendell Vincent Hill, immediately heard the wails of the child and went to the front steps to see what it was about. There he found the small wicker basket lying on the ground. Inside it was a little baby, no more than a few months old, tucked in the soft blankets. The child was crying its heart out, either hungry or hurt or cold or all of the above. The priest took the child inside to save it from the cold without a second thought. After the child was fed and tucked in, and finding out the baby was a boy after a needed diaper change, the priest looked for any signs of the boy's identity or the mother's. All he found was a single note that was tucked in between the folds of the blanket. In it was written:

His name is Theolinus. Please take care of him.

Seeing it a pity to leave the child with only a first name, Father Michael gave him his middle name for the last name. The woman was never found nor was there a clear explanation on why she had decided to leave the child at that particular church. The priest adopted Theolinus, or 'Theo' as he is known now, and raised him as his own child. The priest made it his mission to let Theo stay in the church (his home, literally) and be brought up in a normal childhood. It seemed to have worked, as Theo studied and was educated under the church’s roof. It was his home for the next thirteen years before Father Michael died in his sleep. Seeing no more reasons to be there, he gathered all his belongings and left New York the same year in 1994. He stayed under radar for three years before he eventually drifted into a bad crowd of punks and kids with criminal records as he couldn’t fend for himself. Theo soon learned about the ways of conning from an expert that was in the gang, earning the nickname ‘Bad Angel’ due to his religious beliefs and the fact he worked with them.

He left the group in 2001 due to differences and disputes in the gang. And a wise choice to do so as the gang was caught months later after a failed heist and were sentenced to life without parole. In 2004, he met Luca Ludwig –The Gentleman Thief– when the German drifted into a small town he was also staying in. Surprisingly, they hit it off well and did some jobs with one another when they needed a partner. Five months later, however, both of them were caught by the police with the intent to rob a bank but had no proof. Realizing that only one of them could get away from this, Luca let himself take the fall for it in order to help Theo out and ended up serving five months in jail as consequence. As a result, Theo ended up indebted to Luca until Luca said otherwise. They both moved to Burden City in 2005 but he left it a year later due to personal matters he needed to attend to. He still hadn’t paid fully back the debt he owed to Luca and he promised the man before he left that he will.

Theo has returned to Burden City, paying off the debt he earned when he allowed Luca to take the fall for his own crimes six years ago. He has let the criminal underworld know that he has returned so the Crime Lord may call him up for any help if he/she wishes to do so. He never has seen the Crime Lord himself though he respects the person for having so much power and apparent control of the crime ridden city. He’s staying with Luca, residing in Margaret’s rarely used room, while he is there. His job while he is there in Burden City is to watch Margaret Asher, Luca’s fiancée, until Luca feels like she’s safe. He’s been observing her for some time and has been slowly falling in love with her from afar. Cliche as it sounds, it's true. He hasn't admitted to Luca about this perdicament yet since he rather not get the ire of the man.
« Last Edit: December 22, 2010, 10:58:15 PM by AngelsDemonsCode »

Offline WiseFool

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Re: [NC][Seeking More Players Who Want an In-Depth Game!] Burden City
« Reply #306 on: December 22, 2010, 04:08:41 PM »
Hello all - this looks seriously tasty - Queen be Damned Sheiba suggested I take a look and a stab - how may a noob like me with a sense of wry humor as well as subtle macabre fit in?

Wise Fool

Offline Amelita

Re: [NC][Seeking More Players Who Want an In-Depth Game!] Burden City
« Reply #307 on: December 22, 2010, 07:24:28 PM »
Hi WiseFool :)

If you like what you see in the threads of our subforum, I'm sure you'll fit right in!

Take a read, put together a good character profile here and me or another GM will take a look ;D

Ame



ps. The game is addictive... Just a heads up... ::)

Offline AngelsDemonsCode

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Re: [NC][Seeking More Players Who Want an In-Depth Game!] Burden City
« Reply #308 on: December 23, 2010, 12:12:10 AM »
Hello all - this looks seriously tasty - Queen be Damned Sheiba suggested I take a look and a stab - how may a noob like me with a sense of wry humor as well as subtle macabre fit in?

Wise Fool

All slots (except Crime Lord and Head Detective) are open and ready to take anyone in if they're interested. There are three classes you can choose from:

Victims - Exactly What It Says On The Tin. The people that will get harmed from either the Investigators or the Criminals for whatever reason. They can be a waitress or a politician (like the mayor) or anything like that. They can also be corrupt as well, acting out as criminals since no one is really clean here in Burden City. Make sure to answer the part in where you show which crimes (like rape, murder, kidnapping) is acceptable for you.

Investigators - They work for the Head Detective if they're good. They'll investigate the Criminals' crimes and attempt to jail them. There's a team specifiably set to hunt down the Crime Lord. They can either be good or corrupted. Corrupted meaning they abuse the law to their own ends or actually work for the Criminals.

Criminals - They work for the Crime Lord whether they like it or not. If you're a Criminal in Burden City, you have to answer to her. Or you help the Head Detective out for whatever reason. They'll be the ones making a muck out of Burden City. They can be Anti Villains like we have running about or Complete Monsters. They must have a specialty they excel in. You should first check out the other profiles we have here to see what specialty your character could have if you choose to be a Criminal.

Well, I hope that helps you out. If you're interested, just fill out the character application you'll find in the first page and put it up here so one of us, the GMs (which consists for Aiden, myself, Amelia and Christa McGinn) will see to it and evaluate whether or not you need to make some improvements on it before we let you in or we let you right on in. It's greatly recommended that you have a storyline with one of the already active roleplayers ready since it'll help you get into the game easier.

To see the profiles of all the characters more easily, and to see which ones are still active, please go here and go to 'Characters' and see among the Criminals, Investigators and Victims. If you have any questions or concerns let me, Amelia or Aiden know about it soon as possible through here or via PM. Christa is out of the country at the moment so she's busy.

Offline Kate

Re: [NC][Seeking More Players Who Want an In-Depth Game!] Burden City
« Reply #309 on: December 23, 2010, 08:02:24 AM »
i HAVE pm'ed the crime lord a candidate character i had from a "guys and dolls" thread.

Hopefully its accepted.

Offline Amelita

Re: [NC][Seeking More Players Who Want an In-Depth Game!] Burden City
« Reply #310 on: December 23, 2010, 08:11:15 AM »
i HAVE pm'ed the crime lord a candidate character i had from a "guys and dolls" thread.

Hopefully its accepted.

Our Crime Lord (Christa) is out of the country and a very busy bee these days so it might be a while before she responds ;)

Please post your character in this thread and use the template provided on page 1. Thank you and merry Christmas! ;D

Ame (co-GM)

Offline Amelita

Re: [NC][Seeking More Players Who Want an In-Depth Game!] Burden City
« Reply #311 on: December 23, 2010, 08:14:13 AM »

Victims - Exactly What It Says On The Tin. The people that will get harmed from either the Investigators or the Criminals for whatever reason. They can be a waitress or a politician (like the mayor) or anything like that. They can also be corrupt as well, acting out as criminals since no one is really clean here in Burden City. Make sure to answer the part in where you show which crimes (like rape, murder, kidnapping) is acceptable for you.


Please note that 'Victim' characters are basically just everyday people in Burden City. The amount and type of of harm done to them is up to you ;)

Offline AngelsDemonsCode

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Re: [NC][Seeking More Players Who Want an In-Depth Game!] Burden City
« Reply #312 on: December 23, 2010, 08:18:23 AM »
i HAVE pm'ed the crime lord a candidate character i had from a "guys and dolls" thread.

Hopefully its accepted.

I'm sorry but the Crime Lord slot has already been filled by Christa McGinn. She's simply busy for the time being.

Offline Amelita

Re: [NC][Seeking More Players Who Want an In-Depth Game!] Burden City
« Reply #313 on: December 23, 2010, 08:23:52 AM »
Heh, I think she meant she PM'd Christa, not that she was applying to be the crime lord ;)

Offline AngelsDemonsCode

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Re: [NC][Seeking More Players Who Want an In-Depth Game!] Burden City
« Reply #314 on: December 23, 2010, 08:25:01 AM »
Heh, I think she meant she PM'd Christa, not that she was applying to be the crime lord ;)

Ah, I see.

Offline Kate

Re: [NC][Seeking More Players Who Want an In-Depth Game!] Burden City
« Reply #315 on: December 23, 2010, 08:31:55 AM »
my intention was to work under a crime lord - who has more general aspirations... my character has a focus.


Act I. The Profile
Birth Name: Heather Gizeni
Name: Heather
Alias: Golden Goose

Age: Mid 30's
Sex: Female
Orientation: Bisexual, Dome.
Profession: See below

Role: Criminal
Alignment: She believes she is helping the world become what it wants to be - ie Criminal.

Act II. The Diagnostics

Height: 5'5"
Weight: 90 lbs
Hair: Deep Blonde
Eyes: Grey
Skin: Fair
Birth Mark: None.
Tattoos: None
Distinguishable Mark/Scar: Light-Scar on the back of her neck- hair usually covers it.

Act III. The Dossier

Likes and interests:

People suiting / aiding or believing in her business.
Fine dining
High-class functions
Associating with the rich
Money
Shaming those who cross those she likes
Occult / Witchery / Paranormal.
Refined attire.

Dislikes:

Fast food
Those who think low of her business
Cheapskates
Cheap dresses
Rock and Roll (she prefers trance)
Loud music (she thinks its distasteful she believes music should be a background thing unless going to a concert)

Attitude:  Dominate Traits : Vain / Arrogant

Heather is business savvy and highly decadent. Being involved in the creation of people suited for extreme kinks has seemed to rub off on her family, most are considered highly perverted by others standards, Her sharp tongue is quick and often used before thinking which has caused considerable tension with others in the past.

In contrast to her business she comes over as refined and well spoken and is quick to explain her interests believing being honest and open about it with the right people is the way forward for the culture and herself a vital part for it. She prefers people who speak their mind but does feel like taking timid people under her wing, mainly to use later. She does have a strong dominatrix need within her which she tries to keep in check but often this does come to the fore when in the presence of meek people. She does believe people should dress according to their personality and as such is quick to suggest or even purchase clothing she believes suits their nature. For her not seeing so clashes with her view of what should be, which ends up grating her.

She is fascinated by the paranormal and would be quick to offer a seance or offer her own home or places she owns as meditation sanctuary for those who would use it. Once any level of similarity is found between her interests and another she does become trusting and would offer employment or liberties of her own possessions.

Habit/Twitch: Has a habit of coughing when she is hearing something she doesn't want to hear. Often swears when angry
Quote: "Perhaps hon... perhaps. Leave it with me."

Weapons:
Tranquilizer Pistol.
Small-Bottles of Chloroform

History:

The Gizeni family specializes in selective breeding of people to perfectly cater for exotic sexual needs of the rich and powerful. Regardless of race or gender this family sees everyone who is beautiful or has sexual characteristics over and above the average as cattle to be experimented with and bred - such that specialized lineages emerge. Many porn-star freaks come from this families doings and heather plans more to come, however lineages specializing in beauty or other exaggerated virtues also fetch handsome prices - all of which she is interested in monopolizing... and more. Ideas of her services being requested openly is a dream she has.

Specialty

Highly Dubious breeding and body changing clinics (which performs unregistered and unapproved practices - i.e. illegal medical practices)

Possible Crimes for Victims

Robbery: No
Kidnapping: Yes
Assault: Maybe
Arson: No
Blackmail: Yes
Forced Criminal Activity: Yes
Rape: Maybe
Murder: No
« Last Edit: December 23, 2010, 09:47:55 AM by Kate »

Offline Amelita

Re: [NC][Seeking More Players Who Want an In-Depth Game!] Burden City
« Reply #316 on: December 23, 2010, 08:45:09 AM »
She looks good, Kate.
I'd love to see a little more in her 'personality' part and a little more detail in her likes and dislikes: Perverted can mean one thing to me and another to the next person, and I assume she likes or dislikes something other than sex-related things as well...? :)
A more substantial picture of her, is what I'm asking for I think ::)





Offline AngelsDemonsCode

  • Sweet Soul, Sour Smile.
  • Lady
  • Enchanted
  • *
  • Join Date: Sep 2010
  • Location: Somewhere Hot, Somewhere Cool.
  • Gender: Female
  • Prostitution is the world's oldest profession
  • My Role Play Preferences
  • View My Rolls
  • Referrals: 0
Re: [NC][Seeking More Players Who Want an In-Depth Game!] Burden City
« Reply #317 on: December 23, 2010, 08:52:36 AM »
Okay... well...

It would be nice if you simply put Personality into her Attitude in order to keep in line of the character applications Lady Reign made. The Likes and Dislikes aren't just for sexual ones but also non-sexual ones and please don't generalize everything and go 'all sexually perverted' or 'people judge others likes'. It's too vague and honestly doesn't cover anything at all when one reads it. And her history is something that is about her and not just her family.

And, really, can you please give her one specialty she's good at that will could cover all the possible crimes you've mentioned? Like porn star training or something among those lines? Because it'll be a pain to add all of that in her Specialty.
« Last Edit: December 23, 2010, 08:54:11 AM by AngelsDemonsCode »

Offline Kate

Re: [NC][Seeking More Players Who Want an In-Depth Game!] Burden City
« Reply #318 on: December 23, 2010, 09:46:12 AM »
Fair enough comments - have updated her.

She ok ?

Offline Amelita

Re: [NC][Seeking More Players Who Want an In-Depth Game!] Burden City
« Reply #319 on: December 23, 2010, 07:38:22 PM »
Much better :)

I think you're good to go, but let's wait for Angels to comment, she's head-GM ;)

Offline AngelsDemonsCode

  • Sweet Soul, Sour Smile.
  • Lady
  • Enchanted
  • *
  • Join Date: Sep 2010
  • Location: Somewhere Hot, Somewhere Cool.
  • Gender: Female
  • Prostitution is the world's oldest profession
  • My Role Play Preferences
  • View My Rolls
  • Referrals: 0
Re: [NC][Seeking More Players Who Want an In-Depth Game!] Burden City
« Reply #320 on: December 24, 2010, 01:24:48 AM »
Kate, welcome to Burden City. You were already in since Amelia approved of you and your profile is alright. Just head on over to the subforums linked here a few posts up. Drop by the OOC to let others know about you and your characters and see if you can get yourself an invite to the Group Event we're having.

I hope you have a good day at Burden City and your character will be posted up in the Criminals section and added into the directory around today I think.

Offline Gravik

Re: [NC][Seeking More Players Who Want an In-Depth Game!] Burden City
« Reply #321 on: January 09, 2011, 04:50:12 PM »
Hi guys. Here's my character sheet. I look forward to writing with you guys soon and I know I've written with a couple of you in other group games. :D


Act I. The Profile
Birth Name: Marcus Andrew Evans
Name: Marcus Evans
Alias: Marcus or Mark.
Player: Gravik
Age: 29
Sex: Male
Orientation: Heterosexual
Profession: Investigator
Role: Undercover Investigator for BCPD
Alignment: Investigators
Active: Yes


Act II. The Diagnostics
Height: 6’2
Weight: 220; Muscular
Hair: Short, brown
Eyes: Green
Skin: Tanned complexion
Birth Mark: None visible
Tattoos: A black tribal arm band on his right upper arm
Distinguishable Mark/Scar: A scar roughly four to five inches in length right below his left shoulder blade.
Model: Chris Evans


Act III. The Dossier

Likes: Women. Cars (especially his classic 1970 Mustang). Getting the job done in a timely and clean manner. Mixed drinks. He doesn’t have a particular favorite, but tends to lean towards Tequila based drinks. Staying in shape. Light BDSM (Ties, handcuffs, etc). Some romance. Teasing/foreplay. Brunettes.
 Dislikes: Rapists. Impatience. Cheap Beer (Marcus had his share in high school). Super “easy” women. Rice burner Japanese cars. Heavy BDSM. Not finishing something.


Attitude: Marcus can be very cocky and he can have a big ego at times, though he tries not to let those get in the way of the job he’s focused on. Marcus is the type who likes to finish something to completion. Basically, he’s the type of guy who never gives up on something. Marcus is also a very sociable person and has never had trouble meeting new people or talking to strangers. Also, if there is something on his mind that is bugging him, he isn't afraid to let it be known.

Habit/Twitch: Marcus tends not to show when he’s nervous but when he is he tends to crack his knuckles.
Quote:  “I have never been lost, but I will admit to being confused for several weeks.” – Daniel Boone

Weapons:
  • 2 fourth generation Glock 19’s. Marcus keeps one on him at all times, usually attached to a shoulder holster that is easily concealed under a zipup hoodie. Accompanied are a suppressor and two additional magazines. The other gun is generally kept in the glove compartment of his vehicle, along with spare ammunition and another suppressor.
  • A modified 1970 Boss 429 Mustang.

History:
Marcus was born and raised in Burden City. While growing up, he never really got along well with his parents. His father had been in the military for over 20 years and was hoping that Marcus would take that path as well. Marcus had no intentions of joining the military. He’d always dreamed of being a police officer, which wasn’t something his father wanted for him. His father didn’t want him to end up a measly ass police officer that didn’t amount to anything. It seemed like whatever Marcus did, his parents disapproved of it, at least his father did anyway.

While going to school, Marcus was exposed to fighting, alcohol, and drug. While he did manage to stay away from drugs, alcohol and fighting he wasn’t able avoid. While he never actually did drugs, Marcus always claimed it was because his drug of choice was girls. He never really had any lasting relationships in high school, but he had plenty of hook ups and short flings.

Marcus was a natural athlete. His father had played college baseball at a division I league school. Baseball was something that interested Marcus from a young age, and if he hadn’t played baseball, his father probably would have disowned him. It was probably the only thing he did that his father approved of.

Marcus was a good student throughout high school. While he didn’t get a 4.0 GPA, he did manage to get all A’s and B’s. Between school, parties, baseball, and girls, Marcus didn’t spend a whole lot of time at home, which was something he was thankful for. The less he had to see his parents, the better of he was.

After high school was over, Marcus decided to go out of state for college. He took up an offer for a baseball scholarship much like his father had. Though, when Marcus got to college, he ended up becoming more interested in studying so that he could fulfill his dream of becoming a cop. He was able to finish and get his degree within four years and then it was off to get his law enforcement degree. Once Marcus got his degree, he moved back to Burden City to see if he could get a job as a police officer. He was able to, though of course he had to start at the bottom and work his way up from there. Marcus has now been with the BCPD for five years….

« Last Edit: January 09, 2011, 09:32:29 PM by Gravik »

Offline Amelita

Re: [NC][Seeking More Players Who Want an In-Depth Game!] Burden City
« Reply #322 on: January 09, 2011, 08:08:19 PM »
Can I eat him? ::)


Hi there. ;D

I like him, you've come up with a solid concept and a well written one at that.
I'd love a teeny little more in the attitude part (which is what many call 'character' in their profiles), but as long as you do that I think you're good to go and one of us will move your character to the appropriate thread.

(Are you aware of the other Marcus in the game?)

Offline Gravik

Re: [NC][Seeking More Players Who Want an In-Depth Game!] Burden City
« Reply #323 on: January 09, 2011, 09:39:18 PM »
Well, he won't bite....too hard at least. :D

Alrighty. I added some more to the attitude part. If you still want more, let me know. :)

Nope, I didn't see the other Marcus.

Edit: Now I'm aware of the other Marcus.
« Last Edit: January 09, 2011, 09:40:25 PM by Gravik »

Offline Amelita

Re: [NC][Seeking More Players Who Want an In-Depth Game!] Burden City
« Reply #324 on: January 09, 2011, 09:58:21 PM »
Thank you for that, and

Welcome to Burden City :-)

Your character will be posted in the appropriate thread. Feel free to drop by the OOC and if you need any help or explanations, don't hesitate to ask one of us GM's (myself, AngelsDemonsCode and Aiden are active at the moment)