I... Am... Not... Gay! I think...(F/F, open to all)

[Blinkin]

Standard Disclaimer

The gender of the player and that of the character has no relation to the other. If you're male and want to play a female, a female and want to play a male or a wolf wanting to play a sheep; it isn't relevant to my willingness to write/roleplay with you.





I thought that I had my life pretty well figured out, all of my little ducks in a row and quacking away contentedly. I had a great job that I love in the Obstetrics department of the hospital; I was engaged to a wonderful guy who I loved desperately; a BFF that I would die for; I even had a loving dog to keep my toes warm on cold nights. At 24, I thought that , all in all, I was in pretty good shape.

I mean, other than the important things in life, I was even considered quite an attractive woman, just for that sugar on top feeling, you know what I mean? I admit that  I wasn’t very thrilled with my thick mane of mousy brown hair, but it did set off my hazel eyes and my high cheekbones that I inherited from my grandmother rather nicely, if I do say so myself. I had Good, clear and smooth skin that could probably use a little more time in a tanning booth, but good sunlight is in short supply when you work 2nd shift. Besides, everyone knows that too much sun ruins the skin. but I do  have my 36-C’s and the matching 36” hips; not to mention my slender waistline; I've gotten my fair share of compliments from the guys. Perhaps at 5'8, I was a little on the tall side, but that just meant, as my fiance' Keith says, that I have legs that "Go all the way up!"... Whatever that is suppose to mean.

So, yeah, I thought that my Life was motoring along pretty well for me. At least  until last night, that is. I mean, when a brick wall jumps up to smack you in the face, you sort of have to notice the sore nose, right?. Anyway, it had been a normal night of the usual grueling 12 hour shift, complicated by a set of twins that were 4 weeks early, that is. but I do so love taking care of the babies; maybe I'll even have one or two of my own someday, if Keith ever got his hands on the ball and decided to help set a date; as my mother told me many times,  she would expect to see no grandchildren before our marriage and while he may hate condoms, it's like my momma used to say as well, "there’s no lover without the cover." and he's wearing one  until I get that other ring on my finger, at least.

Anyway, As I was saying, I had been through a hard shift and all I wanted was to fall into bed and sleep for a couple of days.  It was around 12:40 in the morning when  I opened the front door of the apartment that Keith and I shared that my first hint filled my ears; A sound that reminded me strongly of a hyperactive chipmunk. It was  coming from our bedroom! On the way through the apartment,I greeted Cozy, our chocolate labby before I peered through the open doorway. What I saw wasn’t something any woman wants to see; your fiance in your bed with some teeny-bopper riding him like she was going for the gold buckle at a Sante' Fe rodeo! To say that I was pissed, was a vast understatement of the finest british royals; I was ready to get the butcher knife and - well, I wasn't sure what I would of done.
I'll have to admit that even while I was growing an understanding for Mrs. Bonnet when I actually looked at the bimbo bitch riding my ex-fiance'; Just seeing her on top of Keith, the glistening skin, the arched back, even her butt caused a totally unexpected reaction within me. Suddenly, I was hot; I mean sunburned privates hot! I could feel my nipples harden and my vagina dampen - hell, it felt like a waterfall between my legs.  I was so confused, so conflicted that I couldn't stand there; I had to get out of the apartment! I doubt that Keith even noticed that I had been in the place at all at that point.

For the next couple of hours, I just drove around town with the memory of the bouncing slut racing over and over through my head; the confusion over my reaction to it...I mean, I’m not gay; I’ve never had a sexual thought about a woman in my life and I- well, if I were being honest with myself, sex never did all that much for me. I mean, I did it mostly because I thought that you were suppose to do it;I had been intimate with a couple of guys before Keith, but I could count the number of orgasms that I had experienced on one hand. So, yeah, not so much fun for me. It never really seemed like that big of a deal to me.

I can admit that I can appreciate a woman’s good looks  and style… but I… have… never... been ... gay! well, I don’t think that I'm gay... now? I'm driving myself nuts over it.

Finally, near 3:00 AM, I gave up and called my best friend, Ronni; we had been friends since I started in the nursing program when I had been 18. Her real name is Veronica, but she had always been 'Ronni' to me; we share nearly everything in common… except for taste in men. She’s got a saint and I got a bastard. Anyway, I called and begged a sleepy Ronnie to meet me, I really needed to talk and I knew that her saint would understand eventually. Sometimes, you just needed a good girlfriend to share your troubles with and both of us have had our shares of middle-of-the-night emergencies.

We settled on a little diner near the hospital and  I was there when Ronnie came through the door. We had coffee… I added a big slice of pie, but that’s not  really relevant to the story; I’m a bit of a comfort eater; it’s why I spend so much time running in the mornings to keep my waistline in place and my butt from broopng half of the way down the back of my thighs.

Anyway, we talked for a good hour about what was really bothering me… no, not catching Keith cheating on me… weird, huh? It was all about my reaction to the little slut. Finally, Ronnie admitted that she knew a woman in her department who was a lesbian; if this was upsetting me so much, why not sit down and have a talk about it and maybe she could straighten me out, Afterall, I’m not gay, so talking about it with someone who was gay wouldn’t be in the least bit uncomfortable talking about my sexuality... riiiiigggghhhhhttttt! In the mean time, Ronni told me that I could sack out on her couch until I could find a place of my own. Besides, she loved Cozy, so at least I had a place to sleep.

It took me a couple of days to work up the courage to approach the woman that Ronnie mentioned and… well, we’ll see how that works out… wish me luck that I’m not really gay, ok?





Well... that's rather pitiful, isn't it? I'm looking for someone to play the more experienced woman who will become first Erin’s guide, then her lover, and in time her love as she’s taken deeper and deeper into a lifestyle that she had never imagined;  one that she secretly craves as much as she feared it.

I've set Erin as a 24 year old RN, but I'm happy to adjust that to whatever fits my partners preferences; from an 18 year old college student to a 30 year old mother of two kids. Whatever fits best into the story that my partner and I wish to write.

If anyone's interested in the story concept, please contact me via PM and I'll be happy to talk about a partnership.

[Blinkin]

Bumping it up the list.