'My modem? Yes, it's plugged into the phone line. Yes, I have dial-tone on that line. What brand? They told me it was an "internal". Oh, manufacturer? Let me look at it. No, my machine's not open. It's sitting on top of the monitor because I didn't have a Phillips head screwdriver. Won't it work like that?'
Actual. User. (Or, well, once he was convinced he had to put the modem in the computer.)