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Author Topic: Tipping Etiquette  (Read 18401 times)

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Offline TheGlyphstone

Re: Tipping Etiquette
« Reply #50 on: July 11, 2011, 04:11:43 PM »
It might be different if they got a decent wage as an employee and then its optional to tip, I get great service then I might be willing to leave something.

As dkabn said, they don't get a decent wage. Waitstaff, or any other hospitality workers who recieve tips, can legally be paid less than minimum wage, as long as their pay wage + average tips bring them up to the minimum wage.

Offline Envious

Re: Tipping Etiquette
« Reply #51 on: July 11, 2011, 07:38:08 PM »
I don't tip unless the service is good. When I do tip, it's a big tip.

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Re: Tipping Etiquette
« Reply #52 on: July 12, 2011, 08:24:08 PM »
We rarely have a bill over $30 because we chose to spend as little as we can. Generally we have the rule of $10 a person. If the service is bad, they get $1. If the service was decent, but a little slow with no apparently good reason (it not being busy or the waitress just sitting there chatting instead of doing their job), they get $3. If it was good service, they get $5.

If the bill is more than $30, then all those go up by $2 (bad service = $3, decent service = $5, and good service = $7). If the bill is, for some insane reason, more than $70...then it all goes up by $4 (bad service = $5 though if it's really bad then they only get $1, decent service = $7, and good service = $9).

That's the system I've always used and plan on continuing to use. *shrugs* Though there have been times that the service was so bad that I only left a quarter and times that it's been so good that I leave them 50%.

Offline Caela

Re: Tipping Etiquette
« Reply #53 on: July 13, 2011, 05:24:41 PM »
All I'm gonna say on this. Have a good day and at least THANK people who do things for you. You didn't have to. :) Think on that.

I bolded the section of this I wanted to ask about. Did you mean that they didn't have to do something for you? If so then my response to that is that yes they DID. We're talking about employees in the service industry, doing for you (as the customer) is their JOB. I do agree with thanking people for their service and always try to give waitstaff a smile and to treat them kindly (my bad day is not their fault) and to be polite but make no mistake, they do have to do for you.

My other issue is that it's called a "gratuity", it's meant to show gratitude for a job well done. If someone isn't doing their job well they don't deserve extra money and I will not feel obligated to give it to them. Yes their wages suck, but they chose that job (maybe through circumstances but they did choose to apply for it) and it is their obligation to do it to the best of their ability. For good service I tip well, for poor service I won't tip at all and I won't lose any sleep over it.


Offline RubySlippers

Re: Tipping Etiquette
« Reply #54 on: July 25, 2011, 09:48:19 AM »
As dkabn said, they don't get a decent wage. Waitstaff, or any other hospitality workers who recieve tips, can legally be paid less than minimum wage, as long as their pay wage + average tips bring them up to the minimum wage.

Woody Guthrie "Vigilante Man"

My simple response if they want better wages its up to the workers to get them, not ask me to make up what they are not getting. Form a PAC, form a lobby group, form unions, strike and do what they can to get better wages and better laws on taxes. Then tipping could be elective I could say keep the change on a $5.35 check and that would be a tip I would likely do that since I did that when traveling with my military father in other countries. But its principle for me the first thing that has to be there is a proper wage and living conditions first and that is up to the workers to get.

I simply state if you get a wage, set a fee for service or get a salary then you don't need tips the wage should be enough the fee set for your time enough or the salary enough on its own. The modest exception I have is if you only make tips and its my choice to tip - buskers, bathroom attendents, homeless people do some service for me then a small gratuity is fine these groups don't set fees or get a wage or salary.

Offline jj

Re: Tipping Etiquette
« Reply #55 on: July 25, 2011, 10:24:30 AM »
I over tip by way to much and i know i do it. I had a waitress job as a teenager it lasted one day , i could not stand it. I have never done any thing so hard for  me since i was not cut out for it. the only time i don't tip is is the service was just plain awful.

Offline eternalnight

Re: Tipping Etiquette
« Reply #56 on: July 26, 2011, 07:05:05 PM »
I noticed that some people said that in some places the minimum wage for serves is around $3/hr. Where I live (Which is somewhere in America), it's been raised to $4.29/hr. If you think about it, that is literally nothing. Can you imagine working all day, working your butt off and end up only making only $30? That's a bit on the extreme side and would happen if the person didn't get any tip whatsoever. It's not like all the people in the service industry choose to be in that industry. The fact that the potential for tip is there because it allows people to make more than the average person who works only on the state minimum wage outside of the service industry.

I have been working in the service industry for the past couple of years and let me tell you, it's not fun. I've dealt with all sorts of people during this time and it can get a bit frustrating. It's not our fault that the government decides to have the minimum wage for servers to be a certain amount and then expect us to receive a certain percentage of tip. But many of us do try to work hard for that tip. Even when I provide the best service I can to earn the tip. But when I do work hard and then receive nothing to only 10% for my efforts, it can get extremely frustrating. The job is how I make a living, is it really my fault that I only get paid a certain amount of money hourly? Sure, people could form unions, form strikes, but what good would that do in the long run? During that period, people wouldn't be working, only making it harder on themselves. And on the other hand, someone also mentioned that at the expense of raising the wages for people in the service industry, menu items will be raised in order to make up for the labor costs of the company.

It's a business and those people will do whatever they can to assure that they can get the most profits. So even if you feel like the tipping system is ridiculous and you feel like you have no obligation to tip the person who just provided the service to you, just think of the fact that they are trying to make a living and that you very well could have been in the same position that they are in. When it comes to earning money, serving is one of the jobs that would earn you more money that being a retail associate or working part-time at a gas station.

This is just my take on it, coming from personal experience. I don't expect everybody to agree with me, just that they take it into consideration. I don't want to start an argument or anything like that, either. This is just my take and nobody is obligated to see things the way that I do.

Offline Maeven

Re: Tipping Etiquette
« Reply #57 on: July 27, 2011, 11:15:13 AM »
This is a subject near and dear to my heart since I spent about 10 years in the service industry working various levels, low end diners, big cooperate mid to upper end chains and high-boutique establishments.  I was even a cocktail waitress at a big club for a few months.

I think it was Trieste that mentioned that restaurants pay their bussers, hostesses and bartenders a regular salary so why not their wait staff. In all of the businesses I worked (where those persons were employed) this was not the case. The wait staff pay those folks out of their tips. In the case of the higher end establishments, it was a set fee of 3% of the persons total sales. Bartenders also are only paid the reduced wage and generally it was customary to tip them out as well. Same with places that had food runners. So... Say you are lucky enough to clear 20% of your sales in cash tips, you're giving 3-4% to the other staff that makes it happen.

It really makes sense though.  You go to restaurant partly because you wish to be served.  The service fee is automatically added in some cases (large parties, hotels, etc). A majority of the time however, the set price is for the product, the food. That price covers the cost of the chef, the management and the general overhead. It does not include the experience which depends on the quality of the service. An entertaining and attentive server can make your meal. Even if the steak sucks, they can make it all better by providing excellent service.

As to the suggestion that it would be better if they "fought" for higher wages... The more incentive (remuneration above the "standard" 15%) there is for that server to provide quality service, the better your overall experience. If the wage were set and the pay was the same no matter what service they provide, you can be certain that in most cases you are going to be provided the bare minimum to get by (cruise lines are
 a perfect example - you aren't getting exemplary service because there's not that additional incentive.) and
frankly, do you really want to go out for a nice meal and have your $30 dollar steak served with the same care that you get from the drive through attendant?




I am posting from a mobile so pardon my mistakes. It's difficult to edit.

Offline Kate

Re: Tipping Etiquette
« Reply #58 on: July 28, 2011, 08:02:47 AM »
give them a card with your phone number

Doesnt cost you anything and its very flattering :)

Offline Lilias

Re: Tipping Etiquette
« Reply #59 on: July 28, 2011, 08:33:31 AM »
Flattery doesn't pay the bills. Phone numbers bring all the stalkers to the yard, though. ;)

Offline Kate

Re: Tipping Etiquette
« Reply #60 on: July 28, 2011, 08:35:58 AM »
then you can blackmail them for stalking you.

gimme cash or ...

Offline Lilias

Re: Tipping Etiquette
« Reply #61 on: July 28, 2011, 08:37:13 AM »
Isn't that a tad too much work to save a few bob?

Offline Kate

Re: Tipping Etiquette
« Reply #62 on: July 28, 2011, 08:39:46 AM »
hmm good point ... probably giving them 20 dollars makes more sense.

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Re: Tipping Etiquette
« Reply #63 on: July 28, 2011, 11:11:22 AM »
I went out to dinner one night a week ago with my nephews.  They are 13 and 15 and eat like lumberjacks.  Our bill came to approximately $60.00.  The boys are also used to having their mother cater to all their quirks such as a plate of spaghetti with the sauce on the side.  Among all of the dishes that were ordered two came from the kitchen incorrect.  Our fault?  The kitchen's?  Hers?  Who knows.  She cheerfully returned the dishes and came back with them done to our liking.  She overheard a conversation between the boys about wanting to share two dishes and brought extra plates that weren't asked for.  Drinks were kept filled as was the bread basked without our asking.  She treated the boys as respectfully as she treated me, even calling them sir which puffed them up immensely.  All in all she went the extra mile that made a nice dinner out a fun experience.  The boys checked out the name of the place and told me they want to come back again on their next visit.

20% of $60.00 would be $12.00 or the cost of an entree but I felt the extra serving of professionalism and personal treatment merited more so I left $20.00, nearly 35% of the total.  I was pleased to do it and when I saw the older car and heard the two squeals of "Mommy" when I saw her being picked up I was glad I did.

Offline TheGlyphstone

Re: Tipping Etiquette
« Reply #64 on: July 28, 2011, 11:30:51 AM »
I went out to dinner one night a week ago with my nephews.  They are 13 and 15 and eat like lumberjacks.  Our bill came to approximately $60.00.  The boys are also used to having their mother cater to all their quirks such as a plate of spaghetti with the sauce on the side.  Among all of the dishes that were ordered two came from the kitchen incorrect.  Our fault?  The kitchen's?  Hers?  Who knows.  She cheerfully returned the dishes and came back with them done to our liking.  She overheard a conversation between the boys about wanting to share two dishes and brought extra plates that weren't asked for.  Drinks were kept filled as was the bread basked without our asking.  She treated the boys as respectfully as she treated me, even calling them sir which puffed them up immensely.  All in all she went the extra mile that made a nice dinner out a fun experience.  The boys checked out the name of the place and told me they want to come back again on their next visit.

20% of $60.00 would be $12.00 or the cost of an entree but I felt the extra serving of professionalism and personal treatment merited more so I left $20.00, nearly 35% of the total.  I was pleased to do it and when I saw the older car and heard the two squeals of "Mommy" when I saw her being picked up I was glad I did.

+1 faith in humanity.

Offline Beguile's Mistress

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Re: Tipping Etiquette
« Reply #65 on: July 28, 2011, 11:37:06 AM »
*smiles*  Thank you.

Your remark make me think of something.  How often does the bad service or attitude we might receive from a server follow the a less than proper tip?  Even a simple thank you given sincerely can make the experience better for the next person, too.

Offline Star Safyre

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Re: Tipping Etiquette
« Reply #66 on: July 28, 2011, 01:18:54 PM »
Given that Mr. Fyre's mom worked as a waitress as a single mom for much of his childhood and my own stint in food service, we tip every time.  Even if the service is bad, we tip.  Even if the order is messed up, we tip.  Even if we just ordered a coffee just to be able to sit down, we tip.

Once we were eating a complimentary breakfast at a restaurant for which the attached hotel gave out free meals with the stay.  It was a chain restaurant, so most of the customers were paying.  The free breakfast was a sort of a la carte deal with a certain number of items for free.  When we were done, we had no idea how to tip the server, who had actually been very nice and accommodating.  On top of that, we were traveling so we had zero cash on us.  We dug around in our wallets for change, and we had no coins on us except for a Sacagawea dollar that he had gotten as a souvenir on another trip.  He's walk around with that coin in his pocket for years.  We left it for the server because we couldn't bear the idea of just getting up and walking out without giving something to the server.

Offline Maeven

Re: Tipping Etiquette
« Reply #67 on: July 28, 2011, 02:57:28 PM »
One of the most memorable, if not THE most memorable, experiences I had waiting tables was a table of twenty-something's that were super high maintenance and the tip they left was either non-existent or so minimal as to be non-existent.  About an hour and a half after they'd gone, one of the people from the party taps me on the shoulder. He offered profuse apolpgies for his rude dining companions and handed me a 20 dollar bill.

It was so incredibly sweet! I was blown away.

(Then there was the time the drunk lady puked all over my table. That was pretty memorable too, but another thread entirely!)
« Last Edit: July 28, 2011, 02:58:32 PM by Maeven »

Offline TheGlyphstone

Re: Tipping Etiquette
« Reply #68 on: July 28, 2011, 03:38:22 PM »
Heh. I've actually started accumulating a few Sacagawea dollars and including one as part of tips I leave at restaurants. I know they're just money, but I think they're nifty.

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Re: Tipping Etiquette
« Reply #69 on: July 28, 2011, 03:44:16 PM »
That's a cool idea.

*heads of to find the few stashed away SOMEWHERE*

Offline Lilias

Re: Tipping Etiquette
« Reply #70 on: July 28, 2011, 03:48:03 PM »
I hope my mum has kept some of the 2004 Olympics euro coins for such purposes...

Offline Kate

Re: Tipping Etiquette
« Reply #71 on: July 29, 2011, 11:07:51 AM »
Well i think 1/3 of the cost of everything else seems to be the outcome that puts smiles on peoples faces and makes sense.

100 dollar meal for two ... tip them 30 or so, anything less than a solid note 20 really is insulting (unless its a lunch or something then really just stick to 30 percent),

being known as a good tipper I am sure opens some doors in your next incarnation, you just feel like shit if you don;t and feel good if you do (the difference is worth it)




Offline Cecilia

Re: Tipping Etiquette
« Reply #72 on: July 29, 2011, 02:33:26 PM »

My simple response if they want better wages its up to the workers to get them, not ask me to make up what they are not getting.But its principle for me the first thing that has to be there is a proper wage and living conditions first and that is up to the workers to get.

I wonder if your "simple response" is making any effective change in the world.  Do you stop to explain your particular stance so you don't just come across as a being completely unappreciative of other's hard work or worse?     Though, I'm not entirely sure how I'd take it if I'd just busted my ass to serve you a plate of hot delicious food to be told, "I'm not tipping you because I'm thinking you need to work harder at standing up for your own wages.  But, thanks for the great service anyway, it was awesome."



On another note...

My brother took his company out to dinner for their holiday party.  It was an excellent meal and there were plenty of servers for his party of thirty or so.  WHen the time came to sign the bill and add the tip, he handed it to his wife and asked her to fill in the tip and sign on the line.  A little while later, the host of the restaurant came by with a very concerned look on his face and asked if everything was okay.  My brother was confused and said that he was very pleased, that everything was terrific.  Then, the host handed him the slip and asked if maybe they had offended him in some other way as the tip was a bit less than he had expected.  My sister-in-law never even looked at the total amount but simply put in a tip that seemed "like enough" of $50.  On a $3,500 bill.    My brother pulled out his glasses and looked at it closely and fixed it. 


Offline Trieste

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Re: Tipping Etiquette
« Reply #73 on: July 29, 2011, 03:16:57 PM »
>.> $50 times seven would still be a crappy tip on that bill, percentage-wise. Good on the manager to stand up for his employees' tips, though!

Offline Cecilia

Re: Tipping Etiquette
« Reply #74 on: July 29, 2011, 03:26:00 PM »
Yeah. If he hadn't said anything, my brother would never have known, and, actually, it would maybe have been bad for the business.  "That company came over and they only tipped $35 when we had ten people running around like crazy all night long!"   My brother took it up to 30% and they seemed happy with that.