[Blog Series]Miss Marguerite & The City - Day 84

[Marguerite]

Nov 8th [84] - Familia Is Familia Is Crazy Familia

Spending time with the familia is almost like laying in bed for a good week and catching up on sleep. I catch up on the chisme's (gossip) going on in the neighborhood and be able to reconnect with family members. Some individuals may not be up to spending a few of their weekends with the familia. I can understand that but for me, the familia is a priority second to my first of school. Third comes the submissives who I have warned that if he or she cannot take having to wait for me or see that I can get my beauty rest before paddling them, well, there is the front door. Hell, I even make it a goal not to bring around lovers or submissives to the familia.

Have you ever seen criminal shows where a suspect is being interrogated to the point of tears? The interrogators are usually familia members and the suspect are the lovers and submissives. The last time I brought a lover around it was my faja, lil Mar-Mar and three of the six cousins who surrounded him on the couch and asked him a slew of questions. Where do you live? Where do you work? Do you work? How much money do you make? Any criminal records? Ever smoked or done hard drugs? What are your intentions with our cousin/daughter/sister? How long have the two of you gone out? Plan to do anything illegal with her? You know she does not drink or smoke, are you going to get her into that? What is your religion? Your ethnicity? Family values? Any kids? Want to have kids? So on and so on.

Yes, my familia did ask him all of these things. He did not pass once lil' Mar-Mar voice he was an asshole and was not good enough for me. A few weeks later, we broke up once it was revealed he had been dallying with his sometime ex but I was fine once I caught the eye of another male lover. Soon after, the two of us dated and it was a good relationship but once I moved to San Francisco, the passion dwindled. Honestly, I have chatted about the fate of any romantic partners and my familia with other family members. The cousins as well talk on how it will be difficult to find a partner who can take the interrogation along with the judgment the familia will have to see if he or she is good enough or even will stick around to become part of the familia.

For one cousin in law, it took him two years before he was officially accepted by the familia and even then another three years before he was given the permission to ask my female cousin to marry him. If it takes about an average of five years (the second cousin in law took around five years to be found official family member) to be accepted by the familia, it leaves out a lot of men and women willing to commit to five years of being tested and watched by relatives for any slip up's or mistakes. When I mean the familia watches, I have been asked to find out the dirt on cousin's lovers by going through their computer, wallets and cell phones while the rest of the familia distracted him or her from what was going on in the background. Did I go through with it? Hell yes. I have no shame in what I did because I was lucky to find he had a lot of pictures of his relatives and even gave to charity.

Yes, our familia is crazy but it is the way to make sure someone plans to stick around in the long run rather than hit it and quit it. Would you not want to know your partner is not a serial rapist or even has the love for underwear and high heels? I like to know if my man wants to wear my heels so I can buy him his own pair rather than stretch out or break one of the heels. The day spent with familia started with breakfast and ended with watching a few Spanish soap operas while enjoying a glass of chocolate vino. Now you know what are the tactics the familia uses if I ever were to bring another male or female about. As of yet, I have not brought anyone around that I do not think would handle the familia and their wild antics. A few of the familia members know about my polyamorous lifestyle and just let me know to bring around the couples but ready them for interrogation and handcuffs. My favorite.

Miss Marguerite & The City

P.S. I love comments.

[HairyHeretic]

When I mean the familia watches, I have been asked to find out the dirt on cousin's lovers by going through their computer, wallets and cell phones while the rest of the familia distracted him or her from what was going on in the background. Did I go through with it? Hell yes. I have no shame in what I did because I was lucky to find he had a lot of pictures of his relatives and even gave to charity.

I have to say, I would have a real problem with this. I value my privacy, and if I found out someone had done that I would consider it to be a serious betrayal of that privacy.

If you want to know something, ask. I'll either answer, or tell you why I won't answer. There are degrees of trust and privacy, and I won't reveal very private things to someone until I've known them long enough to trust them. An act like that would destroy any level of trust built up. Remember that judgement goes both ways.

[Marguerite]

That it does Hairy and while those tactics are extreme it is how some familia members have known to find out information about others. Not excusing their actions nor my own but what works for one family may be inappropriate actions for another. Yes there is the betrayal of privacy but some of the familia do not apologize for it and I cannot force them to change how they feel on the matter. As of now I have yet to seen any snooping considering most of the relatives are busy with the new baby but I am always ready for another inquisition.