Public Nudity

[Neroon]

I am almost certain that the subject heading here for this entry will have caught some attention. However, I’m not really posting anything here for the prurient. So, apologies to any who have got this far hoping for something juicy.  We’ve had a bit of a mini heatwave here, so people have been going about in far less than they usually wear.   So I was reminded of something I wrote for a yahoo group a few years ago.  The question had been asked about public nudity; specifically, what we thought of it and whether the laws should be altered. Well, being me, the inevitable answer was as follows.

Baring one’s bigotry

OK, I’ll admit to being really shallow here, and I feel really really guilty about it. I mean, I know that I should be much more tolerant than I am, especially of other people’s appearances, but I’m not. I can be a really intolerant so-and-so, but being the polite person I am, I keep it under my hat and go and fume about things afterwards at home, much to my Dark Lady’s amusement.

Now there’s one of my problems. Hat wearing is already slightly frowned on today, with the assumption that if you wear a hat, you’re eccentric at the very least.  OK, I might just put my hand up to the slightly mad thing, but really it’s no more than a mild eccentricity, not anything certifiable, honest!   Anyway,  I guess I’d best get back to the point.

So if public nudity is accepted and widespread, then hat wearing will be even more unacceptable and, without a hat, where then will I hide my bigoted opinions? I suppose I could try to hide some of the prejudices, that my political adherence to the extreme centre produces, in the crevice between my buttocks, perhaps also in the fold of skin between my second and third chin and maybe under the great flaps of flab at my sides that glisten with perspiration as I make my way through the world. But there is so little room there and I have so many daft opinions. Do I really want to harm the aesthetic perfection of my form by stuffing stuff into every nook and cranny that my plumpness affords?

I think it will give us poor men a hard time

And then that idea of hiding my opinions touches on a uniquely male perspective here. If I were nude always, how would I then be able to hide my (positive) opinions on some of the female forms around me? I mean, in some cases what I thought would stand out like a sore thumb! And worse, what about after a heavy session on the booze, when brewers’ droop had set in? How could I explain to someone, who felt slighted by a lack of visible attention, that it I really thought she looked great today but that the other thing was just the booze talking? And talking of going to the pub, how will I carry my beer money? Remember, all of my crevices are already choc-a-block with my daft opinions.

Does your bum look big in what exactly?

Worse, given the obvious physical lie detector that will perk up (or not) at odd moments, how on earth will I be able to answer my Dark Lady when she asks, “Does my bum look big in this?” The nudity thing adds a whole new terror to the male mine-field of trying to navigate a safe answer to that question. And further more, the “this” to which she would be referring would be nothing at all, and the implications of getting a “wrong” answer here would make the Pentagon’s preparations, when they discovered Kruschev shipping missiles to Cuba, seem small beer indeed.

Say no to public nudity now!

For the sake of humanity, keep this under wraps- literally- and stop the terror before it begins. Let’s stop this madness and keep our eyes safe. After all it’s bad enough seeing octogenarians wandering around Tesco’s in thongs and bikinis as it is! It’s no wonder I shop at Sainsbury’s.

[Oniya]

I think the 'no pockets' argument will be the hardest one for people to counter. 

[Trieste]

Now, now. I've said many, many times that it's not fair that you get to take your shirt off when it's blazing hot outside and yet we have to deal with it or wear something that, if it's small enough, is woefully inadequate for those of us with ample assets.

You're just supporting the sexist establishment, Neroon.

[Neroon]

I'm perfectly happy to cover up in the summer.  The word doesn't need to see my man-boobs!

[Trieste]

Yes, but it's still a choice!

[shadowspale]

I have to agree somewhat with Neroon. I think the decision to wear clothing or not should be an individual's  choice but at the same time I believe forcing me to view old, wrinkled, flabby bodies would be cruel. Maybe place either an age or fitness level would stop my going blind. That isn't even addressing the fact that I wouldn't want my own imperfections placed on display.

[Dakota]

Society and public opinion sucks, although it's true that the world isn't as sexist as it used to be, it is still woefully ignorant, I'm a firm believes in equality for all, if a woman wants to relieve herself from the blistering heat then let her remove her top, simple as that, us guys can do it yet the law prevents our female opposites from doing so.
Is that law there to protect our female counterparts from the perverts of our kind, or simply because our kind is still somewhat sexist?
Sorry just something for y'all to think about lol 

[shadowspale]

Double standards exist everywhere sadly. Women can be just as bad about imposing them as men. A friend of mine was recently denied a job by a female employer due to her being "too pretty". I have yet to understand how the way she looks had any bearing on her ability to do the job.

[Paradox]

Trieste-- the answer to that is to take your shirt off and just wear a bikini top; if anyone comments, just say you're going swimming later.

[Beguile's Mistress]

The idea of using your derriere to hide your opinions would seem rather apropos.

Many people are told to shove their opinions there, or are accused of pulling them from there.  Of course, there are also the ones who have lost 50 percent of their filing space and are derided for having a half-ashed (sic) opinion.

[Autumn52]

Kudos to Neroon for being brave enough to voice his opinion. I think that when it comes to public nudity, there should be places one can be afforded this right, places that afford the rest of us the option of looking or not. (such as nude beaches) I mean if nudity was allowed everywhere then that takes away the choice of the viewer. Some people are not ashamed of their bodies at all and I say good on ya' if you are one of them. I just get a little upset when my choices are taken from me, in this case, the choice of whether to view naked bodies or not. I don't think it boils down to the comfort of the individual. As part of a civilized society we sometimes have to think of others before our own personal comfort. We do it everyday in other areas, why not this? Well that is my two cents.