Okay, usually, I hate them, the Chuck Norris jokes and Chuck Norris facts...
some are stupid and can't even be comprehended. for example....well okay, I only ever remember the funny ones...but most of the rubbish ones are terrible, like when chuck Norris lost a fight to MrT...and in response invented racism. Now I'm pretty sure that neither MrT or Mr Norris want to be associated with this 'fact'.
But here are some ones I did find amusing....
Chuck Norris counted to infinity. Twice.
Death once had a near Chuck Norris experience.
Chuck Norris can successfully divide by zero
Who's more awesome? Chuck Norris or God? Trick Question. Chuck Norris is God.
Chuck Norris doesn't use email. He staples notes to kittens and Roundhouses them to their required destination.
Chuck Norris visited the Virgin Islands...now they're just called 'The Islands'
Now this one is a little long, but this has to be my personal favourite.
Chuck Norris and two cowboys are sat by a fire, out in the wilderness, surrounded by the wagons and the cattle one night. The first cowboy turns to Chuck and the other guy and says, "Why, I remember back in the day, when this place was overrun with injuns. Not the nice kind though, the nasty ones like the headhunters, they really did go for your scalp. I once took on four of them at once, using just a knife." He sits back, smug, nods to the two Cowboys and grins, spitting baccy onto the floor.
The second cowboy lights a cigar and says, "That ain't nothin'. I remember one time, I was taking a dip near a waterfall, no weapons, no clothes, no nothin'. When a cougar came up and tried to kill me. Well we all know what happened to him." He too, leans back on his little perch, tipping his Cougar-skin hat to the pair.
Chuck Norris stays ever silent, refusing to be part of this game of macho-bravado, whilst slowly stirring the coals of the fire with his penis.