So I finally broke down and got someone else to rent this movie. Best dollar I never spent. Or so I wish I could say. I owe my friend Rick a dollar. I am going to have to apologize for making him rent this. Well, not like I twisted his arm, really, he was curious just like I was. But I feel bad because I'm about to inflict this on him tomorrow.
But dear God, I was right. They tried to make Conan into yet ANOTHER 'epic' fantasy, when Sword and Sorcery just don't work that way. The only thing they got right, was that Conan was a solo player for the most part. That's it. S&S stories are episodic, they focus on more personal goals, like wine, women and loot, not some sort of revenge quest that spans about 20 years.
Why can't anyone get it right? Turn it into a TV series, for heaven's sake, that would actually work better than his butcher job. And why Jason Momoa? I mean the man can't act, and HE KNOWS IT! He even said so in an interview!
*Sigh* At least I didn't spend any money on this at the theatres.