I probably should have posted in this thread a long time ago. My issues are probably more situational than chemical, but I'm seeing a lot of the symptoms - sleep issues, irritability, appetite issues, no sex drive, a general feeling of 'why bother' - and there's really no one here to talk to.
Last night, I laid in bed awake until nearly 4AM - at least, that's when I stopped looking at the clock. I can't help thinking about the fact that I'm not getting enough hours at work, and there are envelopes that I'm frankly terrified to open. I've been sending Mr. Oniya job listings (he's no longer working at the puppet booth, due to 'issues' with the owner), but from the amount of attention he's giving them, I'm starting to think I should start looking for 2BR apartments and/or moving services instead of at the employment classifieds.
I almost went downstairs to swipe a sleeping tab from the scrip that my roommate just went off of. (They switched her to Ambien, and we were going to take the extras from her past scrip to the local P.D. to get properly disposed of.) Don't worry - I 'know too much' to be a danger to myself.
As it is, I didn't manage to drag myself out of bed until almost three PM. The alarm went off several times at 10, but I couldn't see the point. Mr. Oniya asked if I enjoyed getting to sleep in, and for the first time, I said 'No.'
I also snapped at everyone when the plans that we'd made for Christmas dinner (a roast) were almost up-ended because the little Oni decided she wanted turkey. Mr. Oniya called the whole house together for 'a meeting', and I said in front of everyone that I was concerned about making a dinner that was going to end up sitting in the fridge as leftovers until it grew fuzz. When the roommate was asked what she'd prefer, she asked 'well, what did you say.' I lost it. I stalked off downstairs, saying that I'd already weighed in on this. Mr. Oniya called after me that we were discussing it, and I said that I was fed up with it.
It went downhill from there, and I think I scared the little Oni by getting angry with Daddy. It never hit 'shouting' levels, but it was definitely not 'Happy Families'. On top of this, I've managed to hide the little Oni's Christmas present from me in a too-safe place. I can't find it. She's got lots of presents from everyone else, but this is just the fecal icing on the cake for me.