"Betrayal" seeks female for extreme noir tragedy

Started by Manoir, December 01, 2010, 10:26:41 AM

Previous topic - Next topic

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.


I'm now trying this with someone so can't take up on any more offers, but I'm going to leave this up for comments and suggestions for a day or so. I cant find a rule doing that breaks, but if I missed one I apologize and am fine with a moderator deleting it any time.

Hello, and thanks for your interest! I know the following setup is highly prescriptive as it appears, but I'm new here and after some false starts I've decided to risk showing some of what I'd conventionally conceal. However, it's in no way intended as a demand or fait accompli! On the contrary, if plot, characters, tone, style or anything else below appeals to you, I'd be delighted to entertain your responses, questions, comments, or story ideas along related lines. I've just arrived and am eager for guidance how to make this work best.

I've usually role played on IM, but would now like to try it on a forum.

Lyda and Will are s/m lovers and successful partners in an increasingly violent series of drug dealer holdups. But over the past month, Lyda's become first wary of and then alarmed by instability in Will's moods and rambling elements in his talk, references to other planes of existence and ritual practices out of dim oblivion.

Survivor of a family of religious fanatics, Lyda's acutely aware how badly major crime goes with mysticism and resolves, with some regret, to kill Will, though her ambivalence, along with a penchant for sadistic irony, dictates his death should be as lovingly contrived as possible.

It sharpens Lyda's purpose that she and Will have just pulled off an unexpectedly spectacular haul --  a suitcase of cash and drugs from a robbery-murder that left  behind bodies and enemies. And it assuages her regrets that any companionship and sexual needs will be handily taken care of by Cerise, a young speed freak of her recent acquaintance who takes to being hurt in ways compared to which Will's reactions have grown too familiar and less flamboyant with hard use.

At a celebration dinner over their fortune, Lyda slips Will a slow-acting strychnine analog, a lethal erotic stimulant. But in the course of the meal and some foreplay, he veers off into a monologue about trance states, seeing the future, parallel worlds -- then suddenly experiences an epiphany: "You're having an affair, aren't you,” he accuses, “with that little meth whore!”

Unnerved by his accuracy, Lyda confesses her infidelity. <improvisation would start here> But when Will becomes enraged and threatening, she’s had enough, decides “fuck the sex and tenderness,” pulls a gun and taunts him preliminary to pulling the trigger. He turns grim, but seems unafraid and dares her to shoot.

But when Lyda pulls the trigger, the firing pin falls on an empty chamber. Will shows her the magazine and chambered round he removed and she realizes he's known all along and set her up. He takes the empty gun away from her, draws a knife and advances on her, promising he'll make it as quick as he can and still “cleanse you of your transgression.”

Lyda backs along their hallway toward the bedroom, afraid but not despairing, for she holds out hope in the poison, from the early pangs of which she'd planned to distract Will with sex. That plan starts to look good again, even gets her a little excited, which can only help her execute the gambit...