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Author Topic: Writing sample  (Read 797 times)

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Offline XandriaTopic starter

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Writing sample
« on: October 19, 2010, 09:20:44 PM »
I guess I should jump right in while I'm waiting for approval.  This short sample is excerpted from a chapter in a fan fiction story I'm currently working on.  Hopefully it will give you an example of my writing style.  Comments and critiques are most welcome. Thanks for reading!

Catherine stood in the courtroom, numb with shock.  She simply could not believe this was happening.  The cold, impersonal words of the judge pronouncing her fifteen-year marriage over and granting Michael's request of no alimony, barely registered with her.  Feeling bile rise in her throat, she tried desperately to think about what had gone so wrong and why she had been so naïve she didn't see it coming.  Their marriage wasn't the most fulfilling perhaps, but it was comfortable and she had been confident that she and Michael would grow old gracefully together, secure in the warm companionship nurtured through many years of intimacy.  She and Michael met when they were in high school, and for her at least, it was love and adoration at first sight. After a whirlwind romance, neither one could wait to get married, and marry they did, the summer immediately after graduation.  She learned early on that he was not going to be the most attentive of husbands, and he rarely remembered her birthday or their anniversary.  Yet, every now and then, just as niggling doubts about his feelings for her started taking root, he'd surprise her with a romantic dinner out, or a wildly expensive gift and she would be reassured of his love and devotion.  He had a knack for knowing exactly what she needed, and she took that as proof he cared about her deeply.

Throughout their marriage, Catherine remained in awe of Michael, and saw him as her hero in a wondrous fairy tale come true. A knight in shining armor who had come charging in to take her away from the broken home she hated so much. He had promised to take care of her the rest of her life, which is exactly what she thought she needed.  He told her how beautiful she was, and how lucky he was to have such a generous and selfless wife. He had often jokingly referred to her as the ‘trophy’ wife who hadn't married very well. Determined to see him succeed, she gave up her own dream of finishing a PhD in Archaeology for Michael's career. Working as many jobs as she could to put him through university, nobody had been as proud as she had been when he became known as the most gifted advertising agent New York had ever seen.  Content to work part-time as a research assistant for the University's Archaeology department, she indulged her passion for ancient symbolism, but nothing held a candle to her dedication to Michael.  The majority of her time was devoted to helping him build his career and then later his own wildly successful advertising firm, which had propelled her and Michael to the top of New York society. 

In retrospect, the signs had all been there, but she'd been too blind to see them.  The growing emotional distance between them, increasingly frequent late nights away from home, and finally the new personal assistant. When Michael had insisted he needed a full-time personal assistant, Catherine had protested only because she thought that was what she had been doing all these years.  He had smiled and patted her cheek explaining that he wanted to give her a break and some time to enjoy life a little bit more.  Oh how she loved him! So thoughtful!  Of course, most other women would have had warning bells going off in their head and started digging around for evidence of the truth, but not Catherine. She trusted him implicitly and desperately needed to believe in him because deep down, the thought of facing life alone absolutely terrified her.

However, six months ago, in a cruel unthinkable twist, Michael finally shattered her world completely when he calmly came home and announced that he had never loved her, and that he was leaving her for his beautiful new, and younger personal assistant Stephanie.  Handing her the divorce papers, he told her it was nothing personal, just business, and walked out of her life forever. Too speechless to say anything, she looked up and slammed back against the wall as though she'd been punched in the stomach. The icy blond Stephanie was looking at her with a triumphant smile from the passenger seat of Michael's new Ferrari. It was impossible to miss the gigantic diamond ring glittering on the perfectly manicured hand that dangled out the window. She watched in disbelief as Michael climbed in the car and leaned over to engage in a passionate kiss with Stephanie before starting the car and zooming away, the loud roar of his car engine echoing in the cul-de-sac. Slumping to the floor, the divorce papers slipped out of her hands and for the first time in over fifteen hears, she felt very afraid.

Offline Stormrider

Re: Writing sample
« Reply #1 on: October 20, 2010, 07:37:14 PM »
very nice...if you would like I would be glad to start a role play with you. I know it needs to be PG in the beginning but I am confident you will be approved and then we can move it to other more intimate writting. Would you be interested?

Offline XandriaTopic starter

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Re: Writing sample
« Reply #2 on: October 20, 2010, 08:21:43 PM »
Thanks Stormrider!  :-)

Sure, I'm game.  I warn you though, I'm a total newbie here, and to forum role-play in general!

Offline Stormrider

Re: Writing sample
« Reply #3 on: October 21, 2010, 03:03:21 PM »
not a problem... I have not been in long but would be glad to give it a shot. Do you have any ideas of what you might like to plat?

Your story deals with a broken marrage. Is that the topic you would feel comfortable with.

other ideas might include and I KNOW THEY MUST STAY PG in here:
a story around the song "Stacy's Mom"
or any number of other song or story lines you can think of. let me know hat you might be interested in

Offline XandriaTopic starter

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Re: Writing sample
« Reply #4 on: October 21, 2010, 06:51:20 PM »
Actually I don't have a particular story line in mind.  This writing sample was from a longer short story I'm writing, and I just posted it to give an idea of my structure and style.   :-)

Stacy's Mom, good song, I liked it as soon as I heard it! :-)  Certainly could be interesting! lol  But I'm open to lots of other ideas too.  Some of the genres I like are:

Historical
Sci-Fi
Fantasy
Old West
Horror
Mystery
Suspense

Just to name a few!

What about you? What do you gravitate to?

Offline Stormrider

Re: Writing sample
« Reply #5 on: October 21, 2010, 07:08:27 PM »
so far in hear it has been romance and some adventure. How is your approval process coming along?

Offline XandriaTopic starter

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Re: Writing sample
« Reply #6 on: October 21, 2010, 07:28:24 PM »
I have NOOOO idea! hehe.  All I know is I've written more in the past two days than the past two months, and it's been much more fun than I expected.  Hopefully, I'll find out in a day or two, I still have a couple more questions to reply to, good thing tomorrow is my day off! :)

So as far as a plot goes, I'm pretty open.  We can use my story here, or we could always use another writing prompt of some sort, like a song or poem etc.  What's your favorite movie(s)?