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Author Topic: Perverted Wishes  (Read 89495 times)

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Offline MusicNeverDies

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #775 on: August 04, 2008, 11:53:08 AM »
You do make up your mind, but it's not the for the thing you're trying to think of a solution for.

I wish I had an identical clone so I could be in two places at once.

Offline Hollin

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #776 on: August 04, 2008, 08:57:19 PM »
Granted....but all your friends like her better and never come to see you anymore.

I wish I could get a solid 8 hours sleep for a change.

Offline Kalen

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #777 on: August 05, 2008, 06:03:56 AM »
Granted, but it's the wrong 8 hours.

I wish I could be utterly emotionless.

Offline Maeven

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #778 on: August 09, 2008, 10:53:22 PM »
Granted but because you are utterly emotionless, you alienate everyone around you and die completely alone. 

I wish that I cared more about climbing the corporate ladder. 

Offline dart

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #779 on: August 10, 2008, 11:19:41 AM »
granted, but on the day when you were going to become president of the business you trip and knock the secretary off balance causing the cafe the secretary was holding to spill all over the CEO. This doesn't make the CEO happy. In fact you are immediately fired and thrown out the doors by huge bodyguards.

I wish I had a life.
« Last Edit: August 10, 2008, 12:18:35 PM by dart »

Offline The Great Triangle

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #780 on: August 10, 2008, 06:10:38 PM »
Granted.  You find a 1 up mushroom and eat it.  You now have an extra life.  When you die, you will come back to life, forcing you to go through the agony of life and death once again.


I wish I was a living, breathing, real life dragon.

Offline dart

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #781 on: August 11, 2008, 01:23:22 PM »
One day when walking you trip over something. You look back and its a glass orb. you pick it up ad suddenly you see the ground rushing up to you. you close your eyes. Your skin starts to itch. you move to scratch it but suddenly you fall on your face and find out you hands and feet have shrunk. you walk you try to look at yourself but realize that you neck has becoume strange. you decide to start to crawl around. everyone seems to be afraid of you. when you gett to the nearest shop you glance at the glass and then stop in your tracks  you suddenly see yourself. and realize what you are. A flightless komodo dragon. eventually animal control comes to capture you and you are shot when you try to get away from them. you have wished to become a dragon, and thus you have died a dragon. you wish has been granted.


I wish I had the same powers as one of The Wonder twins.

Offline Mathim

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #782 on: August 11, 2008, 04:18:22 PM »
Granted, but since there is no other twin around, that renders it useless. (I think...don't know if that's accurate about their powers, that they're co-dependent.)

I wish my clothes weren't so tight around my thighs while I'm riding my bike.

Offline Inerrant Lust

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #783 on: August 11, 2008, 05:13:12 PM »
Granted, but since there is no other twin around, that renders it useless. (I think...don't know if that's accurate about their powers, that they're co-dependent.)

I wish my clothes weren't so tight around my thighs while I'm riding my bike.

Granted; your pants fall down to your ankles during your bikeride, interfering with your stride and sending you veering into the curb, half-naked.

I wish I could have a crush on the olympic gymnists without feeling like a dirty old man. (I'm only 18! :'()

Offline The Great Triangle

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #784 on: August 12, 2008, 06:53:20 AM »
Granted.  You're now a three foot tall chibi.  Good luck thinking of yourself as an old man now!


I wish Xylophone puppy adverb grugnir.

Offline Muff Diver

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #785 on: August 16, 2008, 02:52:57 AM »
Granted... I guess. Take it away, Xylophone Puppy!

I wish I was a beautiful mermaid with the perkiest seashells in all the ocean. *wink, wink*

Offline dart

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #786 on: August 16, 2008, 12:07:05 PM »
granted. congratulations You are now the flat chested mermaid who owns the worlds largest seashell's
(don't ask exactly what you want, and you won't exactly get what you want. *laughs* mwa hahaha Ok I have had my fun for today)

I wish I had a better sense of humor.

Offline Josietta

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Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #787 on: August 16, 2008, 12:23:40 PM »
Granted. You are now known as Mel Brooks.

I wish fairytales really did come true.

Offline dart

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #788 on: August 16, 2008, 02:40:36 PM »
they already do... in books and story's.

I wish that the next wish I could grant.
« Last Edit: August 16, 2008, 02:48:42 PM by dart »

Offline MusicNeverDies

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #789 on: August 16, 2008, 05:08:30 PM »
Granted, however due to the paradoxical nature of the situation, Paradox explodes. Take this as a positive or negative, we at E have varried opinions on the issue.

I wish it was Monday.

Offline dart

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #790 on: August 16, 2008, 06:24:40 PM »
granted. the government  has now taken away all weekend and replaced them with Mondays.thank you for makeing us all work more. (note where I am it is a Saturday)

I wish the days were back to how they originally were  (T.T)

Offline MusicNeverDies

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #791 on: August 16, 2008, 06:28:55 PM »
Oddly enough, that is actually a great way to fix my problem. I approve of your work on my wish.

They are, but I hunt you down for making the wish.

I wish I hadn't burnt the popcorn.

Offline dart

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #792 on: August 16, 2008, 06:35:31 PM »
granted. the popcorn fine. but now your house burns down.  :o

((( I only wanted there to be weekends, I don't care if it is still Monday  :'( )))

I wish I couldn't be found by those hunting me.  :P

Offline MusicNeverDies

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #793 on: August 16, 2008, 06:39:04 PM »
Granted. The people specifically hunting you do not find you. But Michale Jackson and Richard Simmons do.

I wish that the movie I wanted to rent had been in stock.

Offline jstarz

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #794 on: August 17, 2008, 01:17:47 PM »
Granted, but the DVD is degrading and its their only copy.

I wish I had some cake.

Offline dart

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #795 on: August 17, 2008, 04:26:22 PM »
granted. someone ordered a 3 story cake and it arrived at your front door. I just wonder how you are going to pay for it. :o

I wish wasn't so lazy and unmotivated.

Offline The Great Triangle

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #796 on: August 18, 2008, 12:44:04 PM »
Granted.  You now live your life with a crazy stalker chasing after you.  If you relax for one moment or care to beleive that you're truly alone, you'll end up tackled and mauled.  That should get you moving!  Good luck bathing though.

I wish I was a lesbian.

Offline Mathim

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #797 on: August 18, 2008, 12:54:39 PM »
Granted but all the laws against discrimination are repealed and you're ostracized by your community and family for your lifestyle.

(Pretty good one, eh?)

I wish my friend Mike hadn't wasted his life.

Offline MusicNeverDies

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #798 on: August 18, 2008, 12:56:41 PM »
Granted, but since he was doing better things he never became your friend in the first place.

I wish my life was less like a bad soap-opera.

Offline The Great Triangle

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #799 on: August 18, 2008, 01:09:22 PM »
Granted.  It's now like a bad action movie.  Your sudden ability to kick ass is impressive, and the random sex is fun, but all of the explosions are a little bit grating, and the fact that computers can do anything through the magic of hacking is just plain irritating.

I wish I didn't have a headache.