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Author Topic: Perverted Wishes  (Read 89453 times)

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Offline Muff Diver

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #550 on: May 03, 2008, 06:56:08 PM »
Granted, but no women ever returns your calls after touching you.

I wish I had telekinetic powers

Offline Sethite

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #551 on: May 04, 2008, 04:38:42 AM »
Granted, but you can't control it and soon after you're accused of sexual harrasment.

I wish I had a statue of mine in the Trafalgar Square.

Online WyldRanger

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Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #552 on: May 05, 2008, 07:41:04 AM »
granted...and it's knocked over as soon as it's finished.

I wish my sinuses didn't drain down my throat.  :(

Offline Kalen

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #553 on: May 05, 2008, 07:57:23 AM »
Granted.. but they drain down your face instead. 

I wish I had the inspiration to write something today.

Offline Sethite

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #554 on: May 05, 2008, 10:24:57 AM »
Granted. But when it's finished, somone accuses you for stealing his idea and you have to pay enormous fine.

I wish I could be a model.

Offline Krule

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #555 on: May 08, 2008, 04:24:51 PM »
Granted, your a Model.. a model car, no longer human I've afraid.

I wish that I could travel though time.

Offline Muff Diver

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #556 on: May 09, 2008, 02:43:27 AM »
Granted, but you run out of time-travel mojo and are stuck somewhere in the 1800's.

I wish I was so close to Cherri that I could glomp her. :)

Offline Kalen

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #557 on: May 09, 2008, 08:43:18 AM »
You are!  But psssst... you're late for work, and have to WALK home.

I wish that healthy food tasted GOOD.

Offline ShrowdedPoet

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Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #558 on: May 22, 2008, 02:05:16 PM »
Wish granted but now chocolate taistes like cardboard.

I wish I could sleep all day.

Offline Seara

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #559 on: May 22, 2008, 03:43:51 PM »
Granted, now you are in a coma and never wake up.

I wish that all my friends hadn't moved away.

Offline ShrowdedPoet

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Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #560 on: May 22, 2008, 06:25:22 PM »
Wish granted, none of your friends moved away, they all died

I wish that my husband was no a jerk.

Offline Maeven

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #561 on: May 22, 2008, 10:35:48 PM »
Granted and now he is wonderful and wants to be with you ALL the time, leaving you absolutely no time for yourself. 

I wish that my dogs could talk.

Offline Maeven

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #562 on: May 22, 2008, 11:00:20 PM »
I wish salad shooter really did help me every day.

You are supposed to change or "pervert" the wish of the person above you, Joe. 

Offline Kalen

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #563 on: May 23, 2008, 06:24:51 AM »
To get the thread back on track... here's how it's done, Joe.

Wish granted, Maeven... but as your dogs talk to you all night, all you hear about is the taste of the water in the toilet, and longwinded rants on the smell of a poodle's ass as compared to a pomeranians.  Not to mention, your dogs constantly telling you sarcastically "Who's a good girl... what a GOOD girl!"  when you do anything.

I wish that my hands weren't so cold!




Offline ShrowdedPoet

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Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #564 on: May 23, 2008, 09:21:23 AM »
Wish granted, now they're on fire. . .  O.o

I wish that it was four o clock already. . .

Offline Zaer Darkwail

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #565 on: May 26, 2008, 08:57:58 AM »
Your clock turns to four....permamently and time stops forever for you and there are no people around (because they all are in the past and your in future). Everything around you freezes and you are trapped in timeless limbo forever until you die on old age.

I wish I get to play test Warhammer Online and play Dark Elves.

Offline ShrowdedPoet

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Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #566 on: May 28, 2008, 09:53:39 AM »
Wish granted but you are now a part of the game and there's a huge monster after you, if you get killed in the game, you die in real life. . .

I wish I could run away from life and start fresh somewhere else.

Offline BlackRose

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #567 on: May 28, 2008, 09:57:11 AM »
Granted, but you find the same problems with your new life.

I wish I didn't sleep all the time

Offline ShrowdedPoet

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Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #568 on: May 28, 2008, 09:58:09 AM »
Wish granted, now you never sleep no matter how tired you get and eventually die from sleep deprevation.

I wish I didn't feel like I was going to vomit.

Offline BlackRose

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #569 on: May 28, 2008, 10:02:10 AM »
Granted, because you already did. Everyone always feels better afterwards.

I wish I wouldn't die from sleep deprevation... *sadface*

Offline ShrowdedPoet

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Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #570 on: May 28, 2008, 10:20:53 AM »
Wish granted, now you are sleeping beuty and a handsome knight has to come and kiss you (violating your manhood while he's at it) just to wake you.

I wish that I didn't have to pay bills.

Offline BlackRose

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #571 on: May 28, 2008, 10:25:26 AM »
Granted. You have no more bills cause you're homeless.

I wish that I could get paid well to sit here on E.

Offline ShrowdedPoet

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Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #572 on: May 28, 2008, 10:35:11 AM »
Wish granted, but that's all you do, you get no exercise, get obese, get diabetes and heart disease and eventually die. . .

I wish that I didn't have to put up with stupid people.

Offline BlackRose

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #573 on: May 28, 2008, 10:44:01 AM »
Granted. Now you're stupid and other people make the same wish about you.

I wish some people would wake up already! I'm bored :(

Offline Paradox

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #574 on: May 28, 2008, 10:44:52 AM »
Granted. Now you're stupid too, so you'll fit right in instead of having to tolerate them.


Edit- Damn. BlackRose beat me to it.


BR- You're wish is granted. We're all awake...and ignoring you.

I wish I had pants on.
« Last Edit: May 28, 2008, 10:46:36 AM by Paradox »