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Author Topic: Perverted Wishes  (Read 89489 times)

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Offline Lanzlo

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #350 on: September 14, 2007, 03:52:28 PM »
Granted. You are now as wide and deep as you are tall. Hey, 'Round' is a shape...

I wish I had a mint condition copy of the first issue of Superman.

Offline Sherona

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #351 on: September 14, 2007, 03:56:12 PM »
Granted. As you walk down the street the clouds burst forth and rain down mint conditions of superman comics...however now everyone and joe has them and they are worth nothing.

I wish I had one of those voice activated typers..easier on my fingers lol

Offline BK Geno

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Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #352 on: September 14, 2007, 10:50:57 PM »
Wish granted, the voice typist is dyslexic.

I wish I was less sarcastic.

Offline Ixy

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #353 on: September 15, 2007, 11:17:12 AM »
Granted: you are now mute and lack fingers with which to type.  But as a consolation prize, you have a cheery outlook on life in general, as if from nowhere.

I wish I had Miss September-- and Mister September-- as my roommates.

Offline Lirliel

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #354 on: September 15, 2007, 11:18:30 AM »
Wish granted, but seeing as your miss October they want nothing to do with you.

I want it to be december!

Offline Ixy

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #355 on: September 15, 2007, 11:20:43 AM »
Granted, but as such you missed me as Miss October and can't find the back issues.

Oh, and you're in the opposite hemisphere, so the weather totally sucks.

(oops, forgot wish...)

I wish that America would socialize its medical care.

Offline Kalen

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #356 on: September 17, 2007, 06:06:46 AM »
Done, but after your tax hike, you can barely afford to feed yourself.

I wish that my dog would sleep through the night!

Offline Sethite

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #357 on: September 17, 2007, 07:01:06 AM »
Wish granted. But after the first night your dog is still sleeping...with the eternal sleep.

I wish I could write without using keyboard or pen.

Offline Kalen

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #358 on: September 17, 2007, 07:40:31 AM »
Done.. as a quadruple amputee, you are left with little choice.

I wish I could clone myself, to get more done..

Offline BK Geno

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Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #359 on: September 17, 2007, 10:01:09 AM »
Wish granted, the clones resemble Mini-me and are retarded, and seek to kill you.

I wish I did not have an ingrown toenail.

Offline Kalen

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #360 on: September 17, 2007, 10:29:15 AM »
You are now missing a toe. 

I wish to lose weight.

Offline BK Geno

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Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #361 on: September 17, 2007, 10:35:25 AM »
Wish granted, you lose all body fat, muscle, and organs. BECAUSE YOU ARE A ROTTING CORPSE!!! MUWHAHAHAHAHA!

I wish my ex was not so mean to me.

Offline Lanzlo

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #362 on: September 17, 2007, 07:05:19 PM »
Granted. She's still as mean, but you're now legally re-married to her.

I wish that D&D 4.0 would come out sooner.

Offline BK Geno

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Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #363 on: September 17, 2007, 07:25:01 PM »
Wish granted, but is so convoluted that no one could possibly understand it.

I wish E would stop dropping posts and PMs.

Offline Kalen

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #364 on: September 18, 2007, 06:17:53 AM »
It does, because nobody is posting to it. 

I wish I was making double my salary.

Offline Sethite

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #365 on: September 18, 2007, 07:52:34 AM »
Wish granted. But next day after your salary is doubled, you're fired.

I wish I could disband European Union.

Offline BK Geno

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Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #366 on: September 18, 2007, 09:46:30 AM »
Wish granted, but it returns the day after disbanding as the World United Union.

I wish my final project was done, and would pass for my final class.

Offline Brandon

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #367 on: September 21, 2007, 01:39:45 AM »
Granted you pass your class successfully but just before the test the school decides to increase the requirements for your degree by 20 classes

I wish I could get paid well just for my good looks

Offline BK Geno

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Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #368 on: September 21, 2007, 02:23:07 AM »
Wish granted, but you get in a horrible car accident, losing said good looks, making a total of 20 bucks.

I wish I did not have to listen to the Islamic vs Christianity conversation going on behind me right now.

Offline Zaer Darkwail

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #369 on: September 21, 2007, 04:29:24 AM »
Wish granted, your now deaf.

I would wish I would have more time play WoW undisturped by distraction.

Offline Kalen

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #370 on: September 21, 2007, 07:33:40 AM »
When the superflu kills everyone but you, you have all the time in the world...

I wish my office had no politics.  *sighs*

Offline NornSavant

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #371 on: November 14, 2007, 05:34:57 PM »
Wish granted as the ruthless office manager arises to utterly crush all resistance to his petty demands smashing morale like so much cheap crystal and scattering cliques and friends alike to the hot winds of outsourced cheap telephone support. Now all chains lead to him!

I wish I could be more Zen.

Offline Kalen

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #372 on: November 15, 2007, 06:56:52 AM »
You become much more Zen.

Unfortunately, you HAVE to, as you are wrongly imprisoned, and are beaten daily by the other prisoners.. adopting a Zen attitude is your only escape.

I wish I wasn't so busy at work!

Offline Lirliel

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #373 on: November 16, 2007, 01:52:33 AM »
Wish Granted, you get moved into a low dark basement, fired and wondering where your stapler went ;)

I wish that I could see WT live in my backyard! :D

Offline Kalen

Re: Perverted Wishes
« Reply #374 on: November 19, 2007, 07:19:50 AM »
Your backyard, house, and neighborhood are all trashed by the onrushing fans.

I wish I could have the money to travel.