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Author Topic: male tendency, anyone else experience this?  (Read 2400 times)

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Offline linggaTopic starter

male tendency, anyone else experience this?
« on: January 23, 2010, 05:40:58 PM »
I donít know if this is considered non adult but I donít know where else to put it, and Iíll keep it as clean as possible. So Iíve noticed certain annoying habits male rpers have when there doing a mating scene and Iím curious if anyone else has had the same annoyances. This is a tally if anyone else agrees or am I just insane. There are three main things that Iíve noticed in patterns of male rpers, details, rushing, and inconsistent sense.

First details, does anyone else notice that there are certain details male rpers will focus on while ignoring all others? Like with clothing, one minet the character will have clothing and the next itís suddenly not there. Not because it was taken off or moved but because the male doesnít even comment on clothing while he starts a thrust. For most part the only thing they are detailed about is their male anatomy, but only physical description. Most completely ignore the atmosphere and feeling of emotions.

Second is rushing, this is connected to details closely. Iíve noticed with most males they rush events such as tearing her clothes off and immediately start mating. It robs from the role play because it limits the partnerís actions. Tearing cloths off will definitely have a reaction, moving over her getting ready will definitely have a reaction; the initial thrust will have a reaction.

Finally Iíve noticed inconsistent sense. What I mean by that is doing something that makes absolutely no sense given the atmosphere of the rp. The best way I can illustrate this is explaining a non-con. Itís happened so many times before; my char will be bound forced and such. Her temperament is aggressive and angry and I clearly illustrate this. Yet males still think itís a good idea to have her perform oral at this point. In reality the result would be a hard bite to some important anatomy. However to keep with the rp your forced to go from aggressive to weak and scared and it robs from the development of my char.

Does anyone else have similar problems like this? Iím not saying all males are this way, I am male and I am not and so are several of my rp partners. I have noticed this tendency in a large part of the male population in all adult sites I have been on.

Offline Idle

Re: male tendency, anyone else experience this?
« Reply #1 on: January 23, 2010, 05:59:08 PM »
I can't say that I am as you have described. I really enjoy the detail, it's what makes it better to me. I do know what you're talking about, though. Well, not with female characters since I don't play them much at all, but with male characters. The lack of detail is a big turn off, especially with the clothes there and then disappearing thing. It is also hard to enjoy the moment that the characters are having in the rp when they are involved in sexual activity. It makes finding a good, long lasting rp hard to find.

Offline Oniya

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Re: male tendency, anyone else experience this?
« Reply #2 on: January 23, 2010, 08:46:48 PM »
Speaking as a female, I'll sometimes make subtle reminders about things like that - like when one character was being tied down, I'd mention how her clothes padded the cords, or the bit about how she wants to bite him.  I might make a reason that my character doesn't bite (such as knowing that he'll do worse to her), but assuming that she's mad, I'll throw out things like her glaring at him and plotting what she can do after he's done.

Offline linggaTopic starter

Re: male tendency, anyone else experience this?
« Reply #3 on: January 23, 2010, 10:00:02 PM »
Speaking as a female, I'll sometimes make subtle reminders about things like that - like when one character was being tied down, I'd mention how her clothes padded the cords, or the bit about how she wants to bite him.  I might make a reason that my character doesn't bite (such as knowing that he'll do worse to her), but assuming that she's mad, I'll throw out things like her glaring at him and plotting what she can do after he's done.
lol i do that most the time but even then sometimes they dont get the hintsXD the biting part they genuinely do but i know ill get people competly ignoring the fact she has cloths. or they'll do like "removes her cloths" which is just not fun at all.

Offline Whoami

Re: male tendency, anyone else experience this?
« Reply #4 on: January 25, 2010, 05:44:43 AM »
I'm with you on this Lingga; an important part of role play is the suspension of disbelief, and that demands detail and consistency, both of actions and character. As regards forgetting about clothing, I assume this may come from the influence of the porn industry, which, boringly as far as I'm concerned, seems to always cut from fully clothed to naked penetration in a flash.

Offline linggaTopic starter

Re: male tendency, anyone else experience this?
« Reply #5 on: January 25, 2010, 10:43:08 AM »
I'm with you on this Lingga; an important part of role play is the suspension of disbelief, and that demands detail and consistency, both of actions and character. As regards forgetting about clothing, I assume this may come from the influence of the porn industry, which, boringly as far as I'm concerned, seems to always cut from fully clothed to naked penetration in a flash.
XD clothing disappearing s just one example, i wouldn't know if it relates to porn i actually don't watch any o.0 i'm glad i'm not the only one that's noticed this behavior. considering what i asked do you guys feel females do the same thing? iv never seen a female display similar characteristics unless their lieing about their sex. then again iv have relatively few female partners compared to male.

Offline Beguile's Mistress

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Re: male tendency, anyone else experience this?
« Reply #6 on: January 25, 2010, 10:55:45 AM »
I prefer a lot of detail, also.  I love drama, excitement, give and take between characters.  I like my character to have a voice and if she's going to be forced I like her to be able to resist.  Look at it as foreplay.  In a consensual romantic scene posts that describe the setting, the characters and their feelings, give detail about what they're doing only add to the story and the ultimate act of pleasure.  In a non-con story the same can be said for describing how the characters meet, their motivation, the feelings of anger, hatred, humiliation, fright, fear, terror, etc.  I also believe that in a non-con story all the details leading up to the final taking of my character are important as well as all the details of the act itself.

When I read a story (and I do read many stories on the various forums) that has the act performed nearly right away and turns a strong and determined character into a whimpering, sniveling submissive, my interest is derailed almost immediately. 

A story that is sex, sex, sex from post 10 throughout the story isn't necessarily a bad thing as long as it's set up that way to start and can be enjoyable if there is at least a little detail, interaction between the characters and descriptions of setting, feelings, clothing, behavior, etc.

I'd rather do no role play at all than do one that doesn't have a story (plot) and equal footing for the characters at least at the beginning, and the ability for the character to still be a force to be reckoned with throughout the story.

On a side note, I've been complimented several times on my descriptive abilities so if you write with me and don't let me express myself you may be missing out on a good thing.
« Last Edit: January 25, 2010, 11:24:31 PM by Beguile's Mistress »

Offline lordfirozahn

Re: male tendency, anyone else experience this?
« Reply #7 on: January 25, 2010, 11:16:05 AM »
speaking from a males point of view ...its not just males that do this but alot of beginnning roleplayers in general...
Its your wargamer types that think they have roleplayed before but get lost when you add any true detail into an event because then at that point they dont know how to react...
I find that the more detail I can put into a roleplaying event the better the event turns out for all involved and makes for most memorable moments in life

Still dreams of Beguile's Mistress's rose against her cheek...

Offline Torch

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Re: male tendency, anyone else experience this?
« Reply #8 on: January 25, 2010, 11:58:13 AM »
What you are describing is simply bad and/or inexperienced fictional writing. Nothing much to do with the sex of the author at all.


Offline DarklingAlice

Re: male tendency, anyone else experience this?
« Reply #9 on: January 25, 2010, 02:09:10 PM »
The only tendency I have seen in males over females when it comes to erotic RP is the annoying male tendency to misinterpret the word erotic as meaning "must include sex". As for detail, consistency, etc. I think that has more to do with an inexperienced RP partner, regardless of gender.

Oh, and if they insist on having their chara do something stupid a good bite might be a bit educational... ^_^

Offline consortium11

Re: male tendency, anyone else experience this?
« Reply #10 on: January 25, 2010, 03:20:31 PM »
I think I'm often the opposite in some ways. In pretty much all of my non-con/extreme scenes my characters end up using a gag on the victim (I can think of one where it didn't and for that one a "bite" just didn't fit the tone), to the extent that I'm starting to get a little bored of them...  :P

Then again, there are worse things to be bored with...

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Re: male tendency, anyone else experience this?
« Reply #11 on: January 25, 2010, 04:03:59 PM »
The only tendency I have seen in males over females when it comes to erotic RP is the annoying male tendency to misinterpret the word erotic as meaning "must include sex". As for detail, consistency, etc. I think that has more to do with an inexperienced RP partner, regardless of gender.

Oh, and if they insist on having their chara do something stupid a good bite might be a bit educational... ^_^

I've always found it most effective.

Offline WhiteyChan

Re: male tendency, anyone else experience this?
« Reply #12 on: January 25, 2010, 04:09:04 PM »
*Has never, to his knowledge which happens to be quite extensive in everything other than this, done that*

Might have something to do with the fact that I'm never the one doing the tearing of clothes or whatever xD

As previously mentioned, I think that's just bad roleplaying.

Offline Josietta

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Re: male tendency, anyone else experience this?
« Reply #13 on: January 25, 2010, 04:21:25 PM »
I completely see where you are going with this.  If you are finding a RP partner forcing something on your character like in a Non Con session, the oral bits, think of how your character would react. Even if they might not bite, and if they can't in the case of having a gag put in place, think of other details that -you- as a detail oriented writer would see your character doing. It may not mesh well with whats going on at the moment but it would add more to the story. Example, I am in a NC RP where my character was gagged and forced to perform oral, she puked on the guy. Plain and simple. It wasn't expected really, but thats how I viewed my character as reacting.  In the end, you should just do what you feels right. I found that sometimes, a good writer will learn from others and improve their writing with time and experience. You just have to help them along the way at times.

Offline consortium11

Re: male tendency, anyone else experience this?
« Reply #14 on: January 25, 2010, 06:52:45 PM »
I completely see where you are going with this.  If you are finding a RP partner forcing something on your character like in a Non Con session, the oral bits, think of how your character would react. Even if they might not bite, and if they can't in the case of having a gag put in place, think of other details that -you- as a detail oriented writer would see your character doing. It may not mesh well with whats going on at the moment but it would add more to the story. Example, I am in a NC RP where my character was gagged and forced to perform oral, she puked on the guy. Plain and simple. It wasn't expected really, but thats how I viewed my character as reacting.  In the end, you should just do what you feels right. I found that sometimes, a good writer will learn from others and improve their writing with time and experience. You just have to help them along the way at times.

And don't I remember it...  ;D

Offline Josietta

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Re: male tendency, anyone else experience this?
« Reply #15 on: January 25, 2010, 11:16:17 PM »
And don't I remember it...  ;D

*laughs* I should hope you'd not forget a scene like that! :P  ((for those interested in said scene you can find it in Consort and My thread Deadlands in the Extreme section))

Offline linggaTopic starter

Re: male tendency, anyone else experience this?
« Reply #16 on: January 26, 2010, 12:33:22 PM »
im seeing a lot of people say that's not a male tendency but a tendency for new rpers. which only means i have stupidly bad luck when it comes to finding an rp partner

Offline Torch

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Re: male tendency, anyone else experience this?
« Reply #17 on: January 26, 2010, 12:47:27 PM »
im seeing a lot of people say that's not a male tendency but a tendency for new rpers. which only means i have stupidly bad luck when it comes to finding an rp partner

Well, it isn't just bad luck, but if it bothers you that much, simply be a little more particular when choosing a writing partner. For example, when I take on a new story and write with someone with whom I've never written, I not only check out their O/O's page, I look at their introductory thread, I read through some of their current and past games, I even see how they interact in some of the non-gaming threads.

This way, I know exactly what sort of a writing partner I'll be working with. Otherwise, its basically a crap shoot.

Offline Oniya

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Re: male tendency, anyone else experience this?
« Reply #18 on: January 26, 2010, 12:51:13 PM »
Yes, Torch has some very good points there.  Look at how people write in the social areas, and you'll have a fair idea about how well they can put a sentence, paragraph, or post together.

Offline WhiteyChan

Re: male tendency, anyone else experience this?
« Reply #19 on: January 26, 2010, 01:04:30 PM »
Yes, Torch has some very good points there.  Look at how people write in the social areas, and you'll have a fair idea about how well they can put a sentence, paragraph, or post together.

Well, see, even with that - in the social areas, I use smileys all over the place, my grammar and spelling are usually ok but not always perfect, I use * to denote actions and almost never write anything more than a sentence or two for said action... but, when I roleplay, all of that changes into a perfectly formed post... *shrugs* Maybe that's just me, but, I would never judge someone's roleplaying ability by how they acted in the socializing areas.

Offline Beguile's Mistress

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Re: male tendency, anyone else experience this?
« Reply #20 on: January 26, 2010, 02:05:26 PM »
That's why it's important to check back through the writer's history if there is one and read the way they post in stories.  Also, chatting in PMs can sometimes help.  Seeing your post above, Whitey, tells me a lot about your abilities as a writer but I'd still want to read, or at least glance over, your stories to get a better idea of how you write.  I don't go be the socializing threads to judge writing ability.

Offline DarklingAlice

Re: male tendency, anyone else experience this?
« Reply #21 on: January 26, 2010, 03:57:52 PM »
Also, chatting in PMs can sometimes help.

Couldn't agree more. In fact I would go so far as to say that chatting in PMs always helps. I rarely start a story without a number of PMs going back and forth about what each player wants and expects, it has worked pretty well for me thus far.

Offline linggaTopic starter

Re: male tendency, anyone else experience this?
« Reply #22 on: January 26, 2010, 09:51:58 PM »
Couldn't agree more. In fact I would go so far as to say that chatting in PMs always helps. I rarely start a story without a number of PMs going back and forth about what each player wants and expects, it has worked pretty well for me thus far.
i only agree to an extent. i talk in pm's langthy to find out what they want and expect in an rp. but i dont use the literacy they use in the pm itself to judge them. when i type on forums and topics like this im not in my story wrighting mode. i dont capitalize my I's and i talk somewhat childishly at times. however if you go to my posts and view my rp's you can see im far more literate then the childish short of typeing i do here.

Offline Cold Heritage

Re: male tendency, anyone else experience this?
« Reply #23 on: January 29, 2010, 11:47:00 PM »
Mostly my experience is the notion that because I play games with codified rules I cannot roleplay at all, or the notion that because I don't crank out 2,000 words a post I'm not worth playing with.

Offline Chris Brady

Re: male tendency, anyone else experience this?
« Reply #24 on: January 30, 2010, 06:09:23 PM »
i only agree to an extent. i talk in pm's langthy to find out what they want and expect in an rp. but i dont use the literacy they use in the pm itself to judge them. when i type on forums and topics like this im not in my story wrighting mode. i dont capitalize my I's and i talk somewhat childishly at times. however if you go to my posts and view my rp's you can see im far more literate then the childish short of typeing i do here.

This may be part of the problem, Lingga.  You present yourself in all that you do, and if all they see is this, then the ones YOU MIGHT want to be working with will ignore you, because you are portraying yourself as someone who doesn't care.

For myself, I use proper grammar and spelling (As best I can) in everything I post, because these are the types of players I'd want to attract.