I met this woman and started chatting with her. I spent four hours talking to her that first day. Shortly after I said goodbye, she IMed me again to tell me she felt like she really needed to tell me that she was really a guy.
His name was Jonny, and he said that he was 22, gay, and a former model. He told me that his dad had died, and he lived with his boyfriend and his mom. He told me a lot of things, but mainly, he taught me a lot. When my daughter told me that she was gay, I handled it perfectly, because of Jonny.
Jonny and I got close in real life too. Though we never met, we spent hours on the phone. A few years ago, around Halloween, Jonny wasn't answering his cell phone. A few days after that, someone answered his phone. Once I said who I was, this person introduced himself as Jonny's significant other, and went on to say, "Honey, I'm sorry to tell you this, but Jonny died a few days ago."
It turns out that Jonny lied to me about everything. He was 26, lived with BOTH parents (his dad was still living), and none of his family knew that he was gay. He even had a pretend engagement with his best female friend so that his parents wouldn't figure it out. I could literally spend hours listing the things that he lied out. I even thought his death was a lie, until I read his obit and read comments from his friends and family.
Which kinda brings me to the biggest lie. He told me that he used to be overweight but had lost it all. Turns out, he was morbidly obese. He had chest pains, but put off going to the doctor because he was afraid of seeing the way the doctor looked at him. He finally gave in when he was having trouble breathing. His boyfriend took him to the hospital, but by the time they got him into an exam room, it was too late. He died of a pulmonary embolism.
It really hurt that he lied to me about so many things. Especially since some of it was stuff I really would have related to... being overweight, not liking to go out in public, being afraid that your family wouldn't accept the real you. I was furious with him for a long time, but that gradually melted away into an understanding that he didn't lie to hurt me. He just wanted to be someone else for short spaces of time, and online gave him that opportunity. The friendship we shared and the things he gave to me were real, in spite of the lies.
Leonis, I would honestly just chalk it up to a lesson learned. Never lend money unless you are perfectly fine with the idea that you will never get it back. Money just tends to get in the way of friendship, and even people with the very best of intentions screw up or have something happen where they can't pay you back. And money makes us all weird.