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Author Topic: 1001 Things not to say to your Boss  (Read 16256 times)

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Online Kiari03

Re: 1001 Things not to say to your Boss
« Reply #275 on: January 22, 2011, 06:54:18 AM »
Your wife told me to give you back your balls. You've earned them.

Offline Xandi

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Re: 1001 Things not to say to your Boss
« Reply #276 on: January 22, 2011, 06:58:05 AM »
The comb over is not working

Offline lenka

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Re: 1001 Things not to say to your Boss
« Reply #277 on: January 22, 2011, 06:59:47 AM »
"Go F**k Yourself Mother F***er!"

Sorry...tried to keep it clean!...would love to say that to my boss!

Online Kiari03

Re: 1001 Things not to say to your Boss
« Reply #278 on: January 22, 2011, 07:11:36 AM »
Were you born with that wedged up there? Or does it just come with the job after years of struggling to make it to the top only to be stuck managing...well...us?

Offline Insanityenviesme

Re: 1001 Things not to say to your Boss
« Reply #279 on: January 22, 2011, 07:23:15 PM »
Hey..Can I borrow your pants? and shirt and suit as well?

Offline BeaconOfSpirit

Re: 1001 Things not to say to your Boss
« Reply #280 on: January 22, 2011, 08:31:29 PM »
Look, just because YOU wouldn't know common sense if it crawled up your !?* and bore young, doesn't mean I've forgotten mine. If you insist on proceeding with this stupidity, you're doing it solo. - Actual quote to boss after being threatened with being fired if I did not attempt to fish the lighter he dropped into the fry vat out of it. Predictably, the lighter exploded about a minute later. HE lost two fingers. Moron. Then again, he still had a job. I didn't, lol.

Offline forestgrrl

Re: 1001 Things not to say to your Boss
« Reply #281 on: January 22, 2011, 10:01:23 PM »
screw you, i'm going home!

Offline Dissonance

Re: 1001 Things not to say to your Boss
« Reply #282 on: January 23, 2011, 02:32:03 AM »
I love this job because you look so much dumber than the other bosses I had before you!

Offline BeaconOfSpirit

Re: 1001 Things not to say to your Boss
« Reply #283 on: January 23, 2011, 08:32:23 AM »
Do you ever read Dilbert and get a creepy sense of familiarity?

Offline Villain

Re: 1001 Things not to say to your Boss
« Reply #284 on: January 23, 2011, 04:03:40 PM »
Hello boss, this is how much I hate you:

I hate you more than cancer

I hate you so much that when I compare you to Hitler, he seems to be an all right guy

I hate you so much that I wish that when I throw myself off the top of this building (because I will if you speak to me once more) I hope that I will land on either you, your car or something you value

Offline DTW

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Re: 1001 Things not to say to your Boss
« Reply #285 on: January 23, 2011, 05:28:02 PM »
Why was I late because my car brokedown and I had to ride through the the desert on a horse with no name. Midway through the trip it began to pour and stop because I had to get out of the rain and it feld good to be out of the rain.


After nine hours I let the horse run free  , 'Cause the desert had turned to sea. There were plants and birds and rocks and things  and there was sand and hills and rings and then I just got here.


By the way did you know The ocean is a desert with it's life underground  And a perfect disguise above  and  that under the cities lies a heart made of ground  But the humans will give no love?


Offline blue rose

Re: 1001 Things not to say to your Boss
« Reply #286 on: February 04, 2011, 12:15:53 PM »
Uhm yes. Those are my panties.

Offline Keaira

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Re: 1001 Things not to say to your Boss
« Reply #287 on: February 05, 2011, 02:00:19 PM »
Where are my clothes?

Now that's a good question but I think you should ask your brother. Just make the wife isn't around. Oh and would you mind asking him to drop my dress off for me? Tell him he can keep my panties as a souvenier though!

Offline Endorphin

Re: 1001 Things not to say to your Boss
« Reply #288 on: February 05, 2011, 05:19:13 PM »
"I really didn't want to talk to that customer, so I put her on hold and went to lunch. The meals at that place are so good!"

Offline DGblitz

Re: 1001 Things not to say to your Boss
« Reply #289 on: February 05, 2011, 11:03:41 PM »
...Well you know, if scheduling was handled a bit better, and someone else was working this department too, I could of called off sick today.

Reply I wished I could give, upon my boss asking why I came to work sick today.

Offline Keaira

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Re: 1001 Things not to say to your Boss
« Reply #290 on: February 05, 2011, 11:36:32 PM »
(I have that same problem but they never seem to listen to me)$


"You know what? Just shut up, stop pretending to know what you're talking about, and go back into your office so that i can go back to doing both our jobs. Run along now!" *waits until he is our of ear shot* "I don't get paid enough for this."

Offline Endorphin

Re: 1001 Things not to say to your Boss
« Reply #291 on: February 06, 2011, 03:44:56 AM »
"You want what? You gotta be f@#kin' kidding!"

Offline Xandi

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Re: 1001 Things not to say to your Boss
« Reply #292 on: February 06, 2011, 04:07:51 AM »
Go sit down, answer the phones and leave me alone while I do your job.

Offline idiotisjolly

Re: 1001 Things not to say to your Boss
« Reply #293 on: February 13, 2011, 05:23:27 PM »
Casual friday is the same as Casual sex friday right?

Offline Iniquitous

Re: 1001 Things not to say to your Boss
« Reply #294 on: February 13, 2011, 05:39:58 PM »
You do realize that I was the one dressed as the dominatrix at the Halloween party yes?

Offline Kimbersqk

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Re: 1001 Things not to say to your Boss
« Reply #295 on: February 13, 2011, 08:13:18 PM »
I delegate you to do your own work and not bother me. I have enough to do without your work added.

Offline evaa

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Re: 1001 Things not to say to your Boss
« Reply #296 on: February 20, 2011, 04:38:11 AM »
I think you have forgotten to zip your pants and there are still stains from your pees....

Offline Drow Denizen

Re: 1001 Things not to say to your Boss
« Reply #297 on: February 20, 2011, 01:06:35 PM »
"I'd call you a cunt, but you lack both the depth and the warmth."

Offline BeaconOfSpirit

Re: 1001 Things not to say to your Boss
« Reply #298 on: February 22, 2011, 09:28:54 PM »
WOW, Drow... I am SOOO stealing that line. That's bad... I love it.

"It would probably be easier to hear me if you pulled your head out of your ass for a moment."

Offline Villain

Re: 1001 Things not to say to your Boss
« Reply #299 on: March 10, 2011, 09:40:33 PM »
"THIS IS SPARTA!!!"