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Author Topic: Future foretold :D  (Read 391 times)

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Offline elenisilTopic starter

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Future foretold :D
« on: April 30, 2009, 06:04:36 PM »
My brother sent me this via email.  Had a good laugh :D

I see that since these headlines are dated 2029, I guess that means that the World did not end after all in the year 2012 per the Mayan calendar.
 
Enjoy learning about our FUTURE !!!
 


 
HEADLINES FROM THE YEAR: 2029

Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the seventh largest country in the world, Mexifornia, formerly known as California.

White minorities still trying to have English recognized as Mexifornia's third language.

Spotted Owl plague threatens northwesternUnited States crops and livestock.

Baby conceived naturally! Scientists stumped.

Couple petitions court to reinstate heterosexual marriage.

Iran still closed off; physicists estimate it will take at least 10 more years before radioactivity decreases to safe levels.

France pleads for global help after being taken over by Lichtenstein. No other country comes forward to help the beleaguered nation!

Castro finally dies at age 112; Cuban cigars can now be imported legally, but President Chelsea Clinton has banned all smoking.

George Z. Bush says he will run for President in 2036.

Postal Service raises price of first class stamp to $17.89 and reduces mail delivery to Wednesdays only.

85-year $75.8 billion study: Diet and exercise is the key to weight loss.

Average weight of Americans drops to 250 lbs.

Global cooling blamed for citrus crop failure for third consecutive year i n Mexifornia and Floruba.

Japanese scientists have created a camera with such a fast shutter speed they now can photograph a woman with her mouth shut.

Abortion clinics now available in every High School in  United States

Senate still blocking drilling in ANWR even though gas is selling for 4532 Pesos per liter and gas stations are only open on Tuesdays and Fridays.

Massachusetts  executes last remaining conservative. 

Supreme Court rules punishment of criminals violates their civil rights.

Average height of NBA players is now nine feet, seven inches.

New federal law requires that all nail clippers, screwdrivers, fly swatters and rolled-up newspapers must be registered by January 2030.

IRS sets lowest tax rate at 75 percent.

Floruba voters still having trouble with voting machines.

I Love This Country!

It's The Government That Scares Me!

 

Offline Azazer

Re: Future foretold :D
« Reply #1 on: May 05, 2009, 02:13:40 AM »
That is incredible. xD I love it.

Offline elenisilTopic starter

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Re: Future foretold :D
« Reply #2 on: May 05, 2009, 02:48:30 AM »
I got a big kick out of it as well :D

elen

Offline The Overlord

Re: Future foretold :D
« Reply #3 on: May 05, 2009, 07:11:07 AM »

Not too hard to tell the political leaning of the guy that wrote that, is it? <_<

Offline Inkidu

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Re: Future foretold :D
« Reply #4 on: May 05, 2009, 07:28:55 AM »
Not too hard to tell the political leaning of the guy that wrote that, is it? <_<
Remember this is the off topic. Sacred ground, sacred ground. XD

Offline elenisilTopic starter

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Re: Future foretold :D
« Reply #5 on: May 05, 2009, 10:49:52 AM »
No it's not and even though we argue over our differing views he is still my brother and I love him anyway *grins*

Offline Azazer

Re: Future foretold :D
« Reply #6 on: May 07, 2009, 02:28:51 AM »
Got anymore stuff like this? o: