Started by Marguerite, April 07, 2009, 11:41:20 PM
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Quote from: Marguerite on April 28, 2010, 12:37:27 AMSuch great joy to see that this post is still relevant because I was insulted by someone online letting me know that because I did not want to show my breasts, I was not a 'true Domme'.
Quote from: Eden on April 28, 2010, 09:33:02 AMRiiiight, because 'true dommes' don't have dignity or self respect. *rolls eyes*
Quote from: Nicholas on April 28, 2010, 03:51:09 AMDid I mention that I love you, Marg?
Quote from: Marguerite on April 07, 2009, 11:41:20 PMFive years ago, five long years ago, I had entered into the lifestyle of BDSM. Yes, I was under the age and had befriended older and experienced BDSM lifestylers.
Quote from: Beguile's Mistress on April 28, 2010, 11:30:05 AMA therapist friend of mine who sometimes cousels couples in D/s relationships says that the best Doms don't let you know you're being Dommed. They don't make it obvious.
Quote from: Marguerite on April 28, 2010, 11:33:01 AMYes, you are correct Torch in that the SSC was heavily ignored but I was not one to wait it out and I did put myself at great risk for anything to happen. I found out a few years later the male who I mentioned was arrested for sexual crimes. I could have been one of his victims but my curiosity and arrogance might have saved and given me a risk. Above all, this was my experience, I was a foolish female to do such a thing at a such a young age but I wrote this to make a point that my experience is my own. I do not condone underage individuals to participate in the lifestyle and like you, I let them know to wait until he or she is eighteen. I appreciate your words Torch especially for wanting to clear things up.
Quote from: Cherri Tart on April 28, 2010, 11:42:25 AMok, what the hell does showing your breasts have to do with being a Domme? idiot... *glowers blackly at foolish person*
Quote from: Marguerite on April 28, 2010, 11:33:01 AMSome think being dominated takes a whip and a ball gag to do the job. I agree it is subtle and can get by without a lot of people realizing it.
Quote from: Cherri Tart on April 28, 2010, 01:57:50 PMthere is a LOT of ignorance on the subject. i could go on about that at length (and might later, but now i am short on time). to most people, outside at least, it IS all about sex - kinky sex with bondage and spankings, and the sub is viewed in a 'victim-esque' way and as weak while the Domme is some bitch with a stick up her ass who is sadistic and likes to beat people - it's sad, but i believe that 90% of Americans have some form of that veiwpoint.
Quote from: Nicholas on April 28, 2010, 12:30:06 PMI couldn't agree more. I seriously am quite tired of people who just assume that it's all about sex.
Quote from: Marguerite on April 28, 2010, 02:16:49 PMThere is a stigma of revealing you are a lifestyle individual. I know I have only revealed such items to close friends and family. It is all about how you go about revealing it and when it is appropriate. Not really a good idea to invite your relatives over to watch a paddle session but instead gift them a book on BDSM lifestyle.
Quote from: Nicholas on April 28, 2010, 02:52:16 PMI am quite careful to who I reveal my lifestyle choice as well. And yes, I do agree. it is all about how you approach the subject if you reveal it. It takes a whole lot of sensitivity and maturity.
Quote from: HairyHeretic on May 06, 2010, 04:12:17 PMA code, eh? Do we get a special handshake and secret decoder ring too? :)
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