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Author Topic: Having difficulty finding RP partners.  (Read 4834 times)

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Offline HelplessTopic starter

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Having difficulty finding RP partners.
« on: September 08, 2020, 09:06:34 am »
So I first made my account in January and only met one RP partner that ended up ghosting.

I expected a lot more. I know my interests are quite specific.

I know they're not the most extensively written prompts. I know I didn't put a huge amount of effort into formating, with pictures and titles. But I'm literate and it shows. All the significant details are accounted for on my requests.

So are my ideas just shit? Or is there no one on the site that has similar interests?

I've been RPing for a long time and have been on other forums. I really like the vibe here, but I don't understand what the problem is. If there's 100% no interest in RPs like this; https://elliquiy.com/forums/index.php?topic=315454.msg15580737#msg15580737 https://elliquiy.com/forums/index.php?topic=322280.msg15487036#msg15487036 . I guess I'm just out? Like not to sound like a bitch, but it's feeling pretty final.


Offline Gypsy

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Re: Having difficulty finding RP partners.
« Reply #1 on: September 08, 2020, 10:38:05 am »
It is harder to find partners when your ideas are specific, especially if you've only really listed one idea.  The more you are open to other interests, the easier it is to find partners and forge something appealing to both you and your partner(s).

Your request is well written and clear as to what you want.  Your idea isn't shit, certainly, but it is very narrowly focused not only on a specific interest, but you're largely defining what you want your partner's character to be rather than the story or the character you will write.  That probably narrows the field a bit as well.

I wish I had more helpful advice. 

Offline HelplessTopic starter

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Re: Having difficulty finding RP partners.
« Reply #2 on: September 08, 2020, 11:02:16 am »
You don't feel that anyone on the forum will accept a pre-made character?
I have also found that people bump a little more than I would have expected, despite the rather firmly established site etiquette. I'm beginning to think I should be bumping every few days, even if I have nothing to add.
 
« Last Edit: September 08, 2020, 11:05:00 am by Helpless »

Offline Gypsy

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Re: Having difficulty finding RP partners.
« Reply #3 on: September 08, 2020, 11:15:51 am »
You don't feel that anyone on the forum will accept a pre-made character?

I'm certain that some would if the character catches their interest ... but I'm also pretty certain that the number of those that will are smaller than those who probably won't.

Offline HelplessTopic starter

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Re: Having difficulty finding RP partners.
« Reply #4 on: September 08, 2020, 11:22:52 am »
I don't really know how else to propose a roleplay orientated around characters setting the scenario.

Offline Nymphadora

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Re: Having difficulty finding RP partners.
« Reply #5 on: September 08, 2020, 11:23:59 am »
Bumping without adding anything significant or making substantial changes to the original post is against the rules. Staff can't be everywhere all of the time which could account for bumps that seem more frequent. I myself haven't headed into the request forums in a bit to be able to judge personally. I would not recommend bumping every few days without some additions and such though.

I agree with Gypsy, the requests are clear and well written. While there certainly could be someone who reads it and feels they could be drawn to playing a character you specifically want to play against, I have not found that to be the norm. A lot of people prefer to take the idea and elements then create a character to go with for you to play against. Not a rule at all, just something I have noticed over the years.

You might want to create and on and off thread as well. That can contain kinks you enjoy. Writing style preferences and much more. Often people like to see what potential partners are about.

Open things up maybe. Give folks some ideas they can maybe pick and choose from. Bump, yes, but make some good additions to make a bump worthwhile. :)

I hope this helps in some way...

I am sure being ghosted first thing had to leave a sour taste in your mouth. It's a sad reality on RP sites no matter how much most of us plead for some kind of communication...

Offline HelplessTopic starter

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Re: Having difficulty finding RP partners.
« Reply #6 on: September 08, 2020, 11:44:59 am »
I have quite a different experience from back when I was on now non-existent forums. The most contraversial thing I used to experience was people that only worked with their own set characters across any setting that fit and forcing them to fit where they don't. I have a lot of other ideas, but I've only really got this select craving at the moment. And I want to find someone that actually shares the featured fetishes, because I'll know what else will interest them from my personal RP library.

Am I more likely to get genuine writing partners through on-off? As I haven't had much engagement on the site since I did the Q & A upon account creation, I've neglected other features of the site. I am pretty sour rn tbf.

Offline Nymphadora

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Re: Having difficulty finding RP partners.
« Reply #7 on: September 08, 2020, 11:54:17 am »
Actually, putting it up in the One-Shot requests might be a good idea.

I can totally get what you are saying. And I'm certainly not trying to say you won't find someone either. Just hoping to offer some advice to help you out.

Creating an On and off is one place to start and posting the idea(s) in the one-shots classifieds as well. Try and get that itch scratched since you are craving it.

Having a post within your on and offs listing other ideas while marking your top cravings could open up discussions that lead to something that includes more of what you want right now. Same with listing more than one idea in a request post/thread. It might draw someone in and with a conversation may get you somehwere you never expected but really enjoy.

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Re: Having difficulty finding RP partners.
« Reply #8 on: September 08, 2020, 11:57:19 am »
Hi! So, just speaking from personal preference here in regards to the pre-made characters. I have absolutely no interest with playing a character that I did not create myself. So, if I'm in an X-Men game, despite how much I love Rogue and love her character, I will not play as her. I enjoy the freedom of molding a character to fit my preferences and build a personality that I can maintain throughout. I don't like having the anxiety of "Am I playing this character properly?"

When you post about a character that you want someone else to play, that narrows things down drastically. It gives off this vibe that you won't be happy with any tweaks to the character so someone can make it their own. It comes off as a very one-sided game where you're the only person getting anything out of it. I recently had a discussion about this with a partner of mine in the way their request thread was written. When you focus on who you want to be the other character, and not the type of character you, yourself, are interested in playing, or a dynamic that you are interested in having, you're narrowing your chances to find someone to fit that specific role.

I find that a general theme tends to work best with finding more applicants. "I'm looking for a hot MILF who seduces the landscaper" as opposed to "Looking for a hot MILF who seduces a landscaper by blackmailing him and threatening not to pay him if he doesn't submit to her. Also she needs to be a leather Dom and cuckolding her husband is a must."

Chances are, you're not gonna find EVERYTHING you're into all in one story. Everyone here has their own things that they enjoy and their own things that they are not comfortable with. So, your best bet is to come up with a general idea that you want to write and see who bites. Check out their O&O page (if they have one) or just ask what kinds of things they'd be into and see where you both lie. Writing with someone is a give and take.

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Re: Having difficulty finding RP partners.
« Reply #9 on: September 08, 2020, 12:03:38 pm »
As your current interest is sort of fetish oriented, you might have better luck using the ons/off matrix -- though checking to see if the people are active/looking for new stories before contacting them would probably help.  There's also the 'Find Partners' button -- the pictures seem to be broken there now, but it shows people who are marked 'Looking' and if they use the matrix, their interests show on the right hand side.

Also, it can help to engage with people on the forums - a lot of people find their stories from interactions in the forums.  Really, there's no 'set' way -- sometimes the best partnerships are formed just by catching the right attention at the right time.

It can be frustrating - especially when you have a story you'd really like to write.  I'm sorry for that, but I don't know any instant fix.  There are ideas that I've wanted to write that have never gotten a nibble, and others that have gotten lots of immediate interest -- and other than luck/timing, there was no real difference in presentation.   

I hope you find what you're looking for -- or at least something to improve your experience.

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Re: Having difficulty finding RP partners.
« Reply #10 on: September 08, 2020, 12:08:39 pm »
Have you considered being the one to approach others rather than waiting for them to find you? I have had the best luck in approaching others whose interest matches mine.  My first stop is almost always the On/Off threads, followed by the request thread of people who look compatible.  Then a PM to see if they are looking. So far it's served me well. But then I pretty much never have a focused craving but rather a general sense of what I want. 


Offline HelplessTopic starter

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Re: Having difficulty finding RP partners.
« Reply #11 on: September 08, 2020, 12:14:18 pm »
Have you considered being the one to approach others rather than waiting for them to find you? I have had the best luck in approaching others whose interest matches mine.  My first stop is almost always the On/Off threads, followed by the request thread of people who look compatible.  Then a PM to see if they are looking. So far it's served me well. But then I pretty much never have a focused craving but rather a general sense of what I want.

I hate to be approached with unrelated requests and can't bring myself to do the same.
« Last Edit: September 08, 2020, 12:18:14 pm by Helpless »

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Re: Having difficulty finding RP partners.
« Reply #12 on: September 08, 2020, 12:17:55 pm »
So a general response I'm getting is that I probably won't find anyone interested in playing this character, which leads me to ask how I can find an RP like this without specifying what I want from the other party. Given that it is the other character that basically drives/sets the whole scenario.

I'm also getting a lot of encouragements to check out on/offs. I'll try that out, but I'm just not feeling very confident anymore.

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Re: Having difficulty finding RP partners.
« Reply #13 on: September 08, 2020, 12:32:46 pm »
Am I still supposed to put my ad on Lords if by and large I prefer to play female characters?

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Re: Having difficulty finding RP partners.
« Reply #14 on: September 08, 2020, 12:40:19 pm »
Am I still supposed to put my ad on Lords if by and large I prefer to play female characters?
If you are talking about your O/O Thread, it will go in the Lords O/O's Threads.

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Re: Having difficulty finding RP partners.
« Reply #15 on: September 08, 2020, 01:00:19 pm »
So a general response I'm getting is that I probably won't find anyone interested in playing this character, which leads me to ask how I can find an RP like this without specifying what I want from the other party. Given that it is the other character that basically drives/sets the whole scenario.


For me, when someone asks for a character so detailed, it feels more like a commission than creative writing, you know? You can ask for certain characteristics that you like and would help the story to move forward, of course, but you can't ignore a potential partner's creativity. I believe the best thing to do is laying out your idea, what you want the story to be about, and what you'd like to find in the opposite character, but leaving room for discussion, and the other player's input into their own character.

Offline HelplessTopic starter

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Re: Having difficulty finding RP partners.
« Reply #16 on: September 08, 2020, 01:06:06 pm »
For me, when someone asks for a character so detailed, it feels more like a commission than creative writing, you know? You can ask for certain characteristics that you like and would help the story to move forward, of course, but you can't ignore a potential partner's creativity. I believe the best thing to do is laying out your idea, what you want the story to be about, and what you'd like to find in the opposite character, but leaving room for discussion, and the other player's input into their own character.

I'm not sure how to specifically phrase this request to that effect. I'd also like to point out that I made a separate request thread for a Mass Effect themed RP that had much more emphasis on the partner's own potential OC. I got ghosted on the one partner that started this and pissed off. This request, is also linked after the first.
« Last Edit: September 08, 2020, 01:15:54 pm by Helpless »

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Re: Having difficulty finding RP partners.
« Reply #17 on: September 08, 2020, 03:13:10 pm »
I'm not sure how to specifically phrase this request to that effect. I'd also like to point out that I made a separate request thread for a Mass Effect themed RP that had much more emphasis on the partner's own potential OC. I got ghosted on the one partner that started this and pissed off. This request, is also linked after the first.

Yeah, ghosting sucks and is sadly frequent thing. It is something you can mention in your on and offs thread. Meaning a plea for communication. And understanding that life happens but a quick note is appreciated if interest is lost or whatever.

I think the best thing you could do now would be to take a look through on and offs and other people's request threads. See what people do and hopefully feel inspired.

When I fist created my on and offs I was so unsure how to frame it or even word it. There are certainly a lot of ways you can go about it. I will say,phrasing requests, for me, are even harder! So I get it. Trying to put something out there that doesn't cause folks to feel possibly pigeon holed into a specific character as this discussion indicates is sort of the problem, can be hard! But as you can also see, the community here wants to help :) Hopefully that alone will keep you trying and then hopefully that trying will pay off!

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Re: Having difficulty finding RP partners.
« Reply #18 on: September 08, 2020, 03:34:11 pm »
Yeah, ghosting sucks and is sadly frequent thing. It is something you can mention in your on and offs thread. Meaning a plea for communication. And understanding that life happens but a quick note is appreciated if interest is lost or whatever.

I think the best thing you could do now would be to take a look through on and offs and other people's request threads. See what people do and hopefully feel inspired.

When I fist created my on and offs I was so unsure how to frame it or even word it. There are certainly a lot of ways you can go about it. I will say,phrasing requests, for me, are even harder! So I get it. Trying to put something out there that doesn't cause folks to feel possibly pigeon holed into a specific character as this discussion indicates is sort of the problem, can be hard! But as you can also see, the community here wants to help :) Hopefully that alone will keep you trying and then hopefully that trying will pay off!

I went ahead and made my O/O. In previous forums, it was just request threads. So rn, the whole O/O is looking/feeling a little redundant to me when I already detail the same interests in requests. I'm grateful for the assistance and discussion however.

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Re: Having difficulty finding RP partners.
« Reply #19 on: September 08, 2020, 04:31:15 pm »
https://elliquiy.com/forums/index.php?topic=324983.msg15586942#msg15586942 I made this. Hopefully I'll get something decent out of it  >:)

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Re: Having difficulty finding RP partners.
« Reply #20 on: September 08, 2020, 07:54:31 pm »
So is it any better? Am I more likely to get a partner now?

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Re: Having difficulty finding RP partners.
« Reply #21 on: September 08, 2020, 08:32:26 pm »
Better. You probably won’t get people knocking down your door, but your chances may improve.  Other things that can help yourself:

- Fill our the matrix. Yes, the Ons/Offs thing. Some folks prefer visual references, and it’ll increase your visibility.

- Create a thread for yourself in the Lords ONS & Offs board (yes, That gets confusing, I know.) Look at other people’s boards for ideas on formatting. Steal... er... be inspired by what you like most. Include writing samples so folks know what your style is like.

- Socialize. Put yourself out there. Join a group RP that interests you; even if it dies, you’ll have met some folks and out your name out there.

- Play in someone else’s playground. Yes, you’ve got ideas and stories you want to tell. So do other people. Find someone who seems compatible, offer to do one of their stories if it strikes your fancy. If things work out, then raise the possibility of them doing one of your stories, either concurrently or consecutively.



Best of luck!

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Re: Having difficulty finding RP partners.
« Reply #22 on: September 08, 2020, 08:38:52 pm »
Better. You probably won’t get people knocking down your door, but your chances may improve.  Other things that can help yourself:

- Fill our the matrix. Yes, the Ons/Offs thing. Some folks prefer visual references, and it’ll increase your visibility.

- Create a thread for yourself in the Lords ONS & Offs board (yes, That gets confusing, I know.) Look at other people’s boards for ideas on formatting. Steal... er... be inspired by what you like most. Include writing samples so folks know what your style is like.

- Socialize. Put yourself out there. Join a group RP that interests you; even if it dies, you’ll have met some folks and out your name out there.

- Play in someone else’s playground. Yes, you’ve got ideas and stories you want to tell. So do other people. Find someone who seems compatible, offer to do one of their stories if it strikes your fancy. If things work out, then raise the possibility of them doing one of your stories, either concurrently or consecutively.



Best of luck!

I made the O/Os already. I do write commissioned smut as a side gig, perhaps I should just link that stuff to my profile? Would that be on O/Os? Also I feel a little weird using like, gender locked subforums. Particularly as I largely play female characters, but have to post on Lords. I just find it a little confusing, do people click on Lord O/Os to find males that prefer playing female characters?

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Re: Having difficulty finding RP partners.
« Reply #23 on: September 08, 2020, 08:47:59 pm »
I made the O/Os already. I do write commissioned smut as a side gig, perhaps I should just link that stuff to my profile? Would that be on O/Os? Also I feel a little weird using like, gender locked subforums. Particularly as I largely play female characters, but have to post on Lords. I just find it a little confusing, do people click on Lord O/Os to find males that prefer playing female characters?

Speaking for myself only of course. But I don't go to say lords to look for people that write men, I go there to look up a specific guy and what he likes. And .. same for the others, or just to browse around. I think we are all just so used to knowing that the boards is for the person not what they write as it doesn't sound strange to us. And some play as both men and women, or everything in between.

If you made an on off thread, link it in your signature. Helps bring eyeballs to it. *points down* see how i have the threads I think people will be interested in there? That way if someone reads something I wrote and goes.. hmm wonder if Sara will be interested in my story about Thomas the Tank engine being possessed by a sex demon, they can easily find my on and off thread and my idea threads and look around

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Re: Having difficulty finding RP partners.
« Reply #24 on: September 08, 2020, 08:48:14 pm »
I made the O/Os already. I do write commissioned smut as a side gig, perhaps I should just link that stuff to my profile? Would that be on O/Os? Also I feel a little weird using like, gender locked subforums. Particularly as I largely play female characters, but have to post on Lords. I just find it a little confusing, do people click on Lord O/Os to find males that prefer playing female characters?
The gendered O/O have nothing to do with what you write but who you are, a male or female writer.  That's it.  If you are uncomfortable with that,  you can see about getting changed to a liege or legate.  They are non-gendered roles.  But there are plenty in both categories that write the other genders.