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Author Topic: Breakup with the person above you!  (Read 290316 times)

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Offline DarkWorld0BrightHope

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Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9800 on: October 30, 2014, 06:56:47 PM »
I say, I do say dear fellow,  you most certain intrigue me.

This is not to say I like you, for I cannot honestly say for certain if I presently do or not, however I can say this for certain, that, for whatever you might think we have together, we do not. Not yet, that is.

Our relationship began far too early, before either of us could have gotten a chance to know the other, which I do regret, for I feel we have only just met. As such, for the time being, I must declare this relationship, that of a romantic nature, must be put on hold until such a time is that we do better know each other.

And so, I ask, if you would be quite alright if, for the moment, we could start over again, however, this time, just as friends.

If you need time to recover or consider my proposition, that's okay. We both need time, and that's all I'm asking for.

Take care.

Offline blue bunny sparkle

Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9801 on: November 02, 2014, 07:47:18 AM »
Dear DarkWorld0BrightHope,

You see, here's the thing. You move slow. I move fast. You are kind and considerate... I am a wild thing with little to no manners.
I want to live on the edge... while you, want to take time to like, I don't know... have a conversation or something.

Do you see the constraints this puts me in? And while I am a lover of constraints... I lean more towards the physical ones.

*zooms off her Ferrari, with squealing, spinning tires and a massive cloud of dust*

*yells out the window, hair flying*

Good bye! Goodbye!

Offline Wispyr

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Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9802 on: November 03, 2014, 11:55:59 AM »
Bunny,

We keep ending up back together.
We keep ending up back here.

You would think we'd learn, that we'd have figured out that it just isn't meant to be.
You're like an addiction, a sweet treat, a habit that I just can't shake. So familiar.

I need to get out though, I need room to grow, I need a chance to be a away from you.
This is good bye, again, I don't want to go through this any more. It's a chore.

Goodbye, forevermore.

Offline blue bunny sparkle

Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9803 on: November 03, 2014, 12:58:20 PM »
So there I was... at the laundry mat. Doing ya know... laundry. And big surprise, this girl comes up to me and says... I know that shirt, and I'm like. Oh no you don't. And she all, yes I do. And I'm like, oh yeah. And she says... its Wispyr's. And of course I'm like no way. And she's like, I've even wore it to bed. And I'm like... oh yeah, I don't wear clothes to bed. And she's like... oh yeah? And then we like started making out on top of the dryers. And...

I'm leaving you for her, sorry dude.

Bun Bun

Offline Kythia

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Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9804 on: November 11, 2014, 04:06:38 PM »
Oh just fuck off.

Offline Cayenne

Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9805 on: November 11, 2014, 04:56:33 PM »
Dear Kythia,

I thought you loved me. Turns out, not as much as I love myself.  I mean, if you can't love me, more than I love me, how can you possibly hope for us to remain together? I mean, as you've noticed, I haven't at any point stopped loving me, and this life is pure, and lovely! As such, I haven't left me at all! I've been with me all this time! When I touch me, I know exactly what I want! I am the of the same mind as me, because of my love for me.
 
I mean, when you touch me, it's like your struggling to find what I want! Desperately trying to please me that if you loved me even as much as I love me, you'd know right away! I wouldn't have to do all the work to give you directions and stuff!

You know what, this is rather a waste of my time, and since I love me, I am also considerate to me and my time.

Formerly yours, now all mine.

Cayenne~

Offline Kurzyk

Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9806 on: November 11, 2014, 05:03:48 PM »
Cayenne -

As sexy as you are, I'm just not a one woman guy... It's not gonna work, I just have too many women in my life and don't have time for you. Thanks for the good times.

K.

Offline Cayenne

Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9807 on: November 11, 2014, 05:16:41 PM »
Dear Kurzyk,

I can appreciate a man with some experience. He's made his mistakes, and 'Polished' his skills! It's too bad though, I mean, any rock polishing enthusiast knows that while the results are attractive, they also happen to be a good deal smaller.  Not saying that somehow you've worn most of the length and girth off your penis - not that I would know, since you've been whoring it out for far longer than we were together, but I do like the idea of emasculating you before I cast you aside! 

Yes, it is over. So feel free to stop reading this scathing review of your sexual prowess at this point, and know that I've moved on too, not because you weren't somehow talented, but I got the feeling you were just always holding back! Like, even subconsciously saving something for a little tail on the side, and while I wasn't particularly unsatisfied, I can't help but imagine how much more satisfied I'd be if you'd actually "Given me all your love".

But you know, I'm sure you'll do well with 2, 3, or even 10 other women, just remember how many great nations crumbled because they decided to allow themselves be spread too thin ;)

Cayenne.

Offline blue bunny sparkle

Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9808 on: November 11, 2014, 09:23:23 PM »
Dear Cayenne,

How many times do I have to tell you... how many times do I have to spell it out?

I. AM. NOT. A BUNNY.

And... I. AM NOT BLUE either.

*whispers* though I have been known to sparkle on occasion *winks*

So, since I am tired of you pouting that I am not a Bunny Smurf, I am leaving you. In my car. That is indeed blue.

Smurf-adios!




Offline Kazyth

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Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9809 on: November 11, 2014, 09:56:47 PM »
Bunny, darlin'...

I know that you like it rough.  I get that you dig pain, and normally I enjoy inflicting it.

But I would also like to get through one movie at the theater without having to muffle you with one hand, and punish you with the other.  I don't care if you're bored, I'm tired of getting kicked out!

We can't even have a meal in a nice restaurant without you trying to goad me into stabbing you with my salad fork.

Restraint can't be sexy too.

So I'm going to go restrain someone else.  Have a nice life.

KazBeast.

Offline blue bunny sparkle

Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9810 on: November 11, 2014, 10:52:51 PM »
Look here Kazyth.

We had some good times. Some bad times.

Our time in the Taco Bell bathroom just wasn't meant to last more than... oh, 20 minutes. Though when you thrust up against me at the sink and-- no! I won't speak of it! But it was filthy in good ways and bad, and bad in the best of ways.

But I need more! I want a better bathroom, a bigger big gulp... and more hot sauce!

I'm skipping out.

You return the tire key ring to the attendant please!


Offline Cayenne

Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9811 on: November 12, 2014, 09:29:27 AM »
Dearest Blue Bunny,

My love for you is like a ship on a vast sea, cradled so upon the breast of your crashing waves, kept warm and safe by your calm, near virginal waters on sunny days, and fed of your salty sea-life discharge.

That was of course until I came upon another boat (Yes, I'm sticking with this metaphor), and another, and another, and eventually a whole fleet of boats! All of whom, HAPPILY SAILING ALONG like we somehow didn't have some beautiful, poetic thing going!  "Oh how I love the sea!" They'd say to me with lurid smiles upon their faces as they sailed passed, their bows parting your warm waters, driving cutting in deeply, endlessly!

Anyway, I hope you enjoy offering so much "SAFE PASSAGE" to "SO MANY" because my "LOVE" for the "SEA" is over!

Sincerely,  The now HAPPILY landlocked Cayenne.

Offline blue bunny sparkle

Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9812 on: November 12, 2014, 11:05:53 AM »
You stole my heart. You cut it up. You doused it with flaming spices that ate my very soul.

And now you say... you want to go farther? Where the hell is there to go Cayenne?

We did it all - the depths of the ocean sex, the speeding car sex, the mile-high club (twice roundtrip), the Taco Bell bathroom sex (after Kazyth left), and oh my god! Lets not forget the alley sex! Or the bondage or bondage camp sex and that cage thing... and...

Um... what was I saying...?

Offline Rolo

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Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9813 on: November 12, 2014, 11:15:50 AM »
My dearest Carnivorous Bunny....

Since you mangled me in our last encounter I have had to have reconstructive surgery to repair the damage...Long story short I have a brand spanking new penis that I had augmented with extra length and girth and I am just afraid of what you will do to it.  So I must say farewell....

Offline Wispyr

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Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9814 on: November 16, 2014, 07:09:18 PM »
Rolo,

You were never my favorite. I'm going to play with Mounds now.

Bye.

Offline blue bunny sparkle

Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9815 on: November 16, 2014, 09:24:22 PM »
Wispyr,

You were one of my favorites... but... you know... now I have new favorites.

See ya round man.

Offline Kythia

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Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9816 on: November 16, 2014, 11:46:39 PM »
Remember yesterday, blue bunny sparkle?  Remember how I quite clearly and unambiguously said that if you raped one more sea lion I'd dump you, no ifs no buts?  And what did I come home to find you doing?  Seriously, what did you think was gonna happen.

Offline Rolo

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Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9817 on: November 17, 2014, 02:42:55 PM »
Dearest Kythia....

When you told me you had holey jeans I thought maybe you meant Holy jeans....Imagine the horror on my poor mothers face when we showed up for Sunday mass...Even the preacher stopped and took notice which did not set well with the head nun nor the choir boy....Needless to say I have been sentenced to a thousand hail Mary's and been dipped in the blood again for good measure....therefore I must bid adieu....

Offline Cayenne

Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9818 on: November 17, 2014, 06:09:16 PM »
Dear Rolo,

This might come as a shock, since you know, I was all orgasmic sounding, and super content seeming, but upon further reflection I decided that maybe I should kick you to the curb. I mean, a rolling stone gathers no moss, even though, there is literally no place on earth where a stone could continue rolling indefinitely, especially down an incline.  Yet, I don't really want moss on me, and I don't mean salty man discharge, I just mean -- it's time to change things up.

Did you know they suggest putting different sized perches in a birds cage so its feet don't become formed for only that size? That's exactly how I feel, I need some variety in my life! Before the insides of my vagina becomes a negative for your penis.

Anyway, I just thought you'd appreciate the reasoning, and wisdom that I used when determining this, that it might speed things along. Also, having hired movers who put your stuff on the curb earlier, I feel my efficiency of moving on is second to none, and of course, it is better to have loved and lost than never loved at all, just as it must be true to have been in a relationship with a highly efficient, high functioning, high reasoning individual who dumped you.

Toodles.

Cayenne~

Offline Boatman

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Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9819 on: November 18, 2014, 11:08:16 AM »
Sweet Pepper,

I had you pasted on the deckhead above my dingy dinghy sleeping pit so I could oggle you every night on long voyages.
But you became a bit frayed at the edges.
Then as time went by and the gathering mould turned your body a funny colour I had to cut all your erotic bits off one by one.

Dissecting you in that way broke my heart, but the result was you simply didn't turn me on the way you used to, so regretfully I decided to ditch you.
Although, I admit I did have slight twinge of the old yearning as I scraped you off, screwed you up and threw you over the side.

Anyway, all's well again now I've replaced you with Miss November.

xx

B


Offline Flower

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Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9820 on: November 18, 2014, 11:13:15 AM »
I decided you were just a rebound. I want my ex back. Thanks for the wild ride.

Offline Boatman

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Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9821 on: November 18, 2014, 11:27:50 AM »
Look, you knew there was only room on the motorcycle for one passenger when you hitched the lift leaving your ex at the side of the road.
Yes, the ride across the low hills and along forest trails with you holding on tight and close was wild.
But when I saw the saw the fear in your eyes, I knew we had no future.
I'm sorry but I need someone with adventure in their heart and loins.

I've paid for the room at the hotel, but by the time you come out of the wet room to read this note I'll be long gone.

B

Offline blue bunny sparkle

Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9822 on: November 18, 2014, 12:44:55 PM »
Dear Boatman,

You wanted adventure you said. And I gave you adventure.
Who ever said we needed to travel to find that when everything we needed was right here in this little toy chest of treasures and delights...
and tortures? Right in the badroom... I mean bedroom.

Whaddya mean you take it back? You want a simple life? A vanilla life? That's not what you told Dancing Flower.

*taps foot*

I can not stay with a man who is crying Boatman...


Offline Cayenne

Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9823 on: November 18, 2014, 02:15:23 PM »
Dearest Blue Bunny,

You know how you said I never write you letters? How romantic it would be for me to leave you little notes about how much I care about you, so you know, in the court of law, with some handwriting specialist you could make some case for me having had affections for you at one time.  Yet, for some reason, as soon as I sat down to write  I decided what I really like to write most is breakup letters.

I mean, they devote a whole intro for the 1988 to 1992 American television series Dear John to just that and they don't even change it up season to season! It's still the same "By the time you read this letter I'll be gone"

I don't cut and run though, I mean, leaving you with some once shared space where you can reflect on the lives we once had, in some sad sack premise for a series about an endless depression and attempting to fill the void left behind by little to no closure.  At least, I didn't think I would, I had every intention of reading this aloud to you, but then I realized cutting and running lets me get on with my life way faster and yanno, you can't try to use your charms to lure me into sex.

So yeah, by the time you read this letter, I'll be gone.

Among the things that will also be gone.

*Me of course
*All the things I liked
*Some of the things you liked
*Whatever petty cash was laying around.

Among the things that won't be gone
*This letter
*Stuff I don't like
*Whatever bills and such were laying around.

Sincerely, Cayenne~

Offline Boatman

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Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9824 on: November 18, 2014, 02:19:31 PM »
TO Bunny:

Dearest baddest of the bad Bunnies,

You have me wrong.
A misunderstanding perhaps?
I meant all of the things you have in mind but with a delectable seasoning of spice.

At 1000 ft below on trimix, or in the toilet of a plane in freefall, or on a high wire over a canyon.
Then, back in your badroom as relaxation.

I have you on hold Bunny.
All or nothing?
Time out.

Line dead.

~~~~~~

To Spicy Ma-tilde:

Loveliest C,

We've said everything we have to say.
The sex was perfect.
The romance sublime.
But not once did you say how much you loved my boat.

The choice was easy.

Bye.

« Last Edit: November 18, 2014, 02:20:33 PM by Boatman »