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The Elliquian Herald & Post
Issue 74 (Autumn) ~ August thru October 2017

Wiki Blogs Dicebot

Author Topic: Breakup with the person above you!  (Read 343086 times)

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Offline Xandi

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Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9575 on: July 19, 2014, 06:25:07 AM »
My dearest Bunny,

I regret to inform you that your shear beauty has made me look at the world in a different way.
You have allowed me to grow and become the person I am today and because of that I feel I
must release such a beauty so that the world can discover what I have, You are an Angel
here on Earth. How could I keep you all to myself? You taught me to be selfless and so
even though it hurts me now I can not hold you to me any longer. The world needs people
like you to shine and brighten the days of those who need a bright star. I release you
of our bond which was forged in love and tears. I release you back into the world to bring
the happiness you have shared with me to someone else. While I will miss you and I
know that I will never find someone like you, I will smile knowing that you are spreading
love and happiness. Thank you for sharing your soul with me. Good bye.
« Last Edit: July 19, 2014, 09:52:38 AM by Xandi »

Offline blue bunny sparkle

Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9576 on: July 19, 2014, 12:30:43 PM »
Dear Xandi,

What Everrrrr

Bunny

Offline Xandi

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Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9577 on: July 19, 2014, 12:57:35 PM »
Dear Xandi,

What Everrrrr

Bunny

*Cries Hysterically*......bye

Offline Renegade Vile

Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9578 on: July 19, 2014, 01:44:51 PM »
I'm sorry, but you've been taking the "perfect, lovestruck strangers" role playing into our everyday lives. It's gone too far!
All you do these days is look at me, while leaning on walls, as if we're experiencing "love at first sight" again. You even get angry if I don't play along!

Here is the url to a good role playing site, go work it off there. But for now, we're through!

Online Cayenne

Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9579 on: August 07, 2014, 12:26:12 PM »
Dearest Renegade,

By the time you read this letter, I'll have burnt down your castle, and made off with the relics of the ancient kingdom of which you'd worked so diligently to acquire for me. Don't worry, I was sure to leave enough evidence that the neighbouring kingdom did it, to blind your people from the real culprit.

See? I'm not all heartless. 

I get the prize you dreamed about, and you get a bloody, and undoubtedly long war. That is, unless you're willing to admit to them that the woman they all warned you about actually turned out to be as bad news as they thought!

Anyway, don't bother looking for me, just know that I'll be happy and rich.

Not yours, but you're welcome to continue to imagine it, to get you through the night.

Cayenne~

Offline Boatman

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Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9580 on: August 07, 2014, 03:05:54 PM »
C,

Most Boat girls fall into my arms when I start up the DB5 and adjust the tilt on the seat.
Not you.

So we are history.


Online Cayenne

Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9581 on: August 07, 2014, 03:36:11 PM »
Dear Boatman,

Let me just get this out of the way.

You have a knife.

Not a boat.

We're not playing knifey boatsy.

If you want to be a boatman, you should get yourself a boat. Also, it isn't safe to be wearing all black while boating in dangerous waters, any boating expert should know that.  Should something happen, you'll just die, nobody flies around looking for a black speck, in a dark blue sea, it just doesn't happen.

I know you might think you're too good for the rules, but honestly, that just makes you cocky, not good, try not to confuse these things.

In other news.

We're done!

Not that we really started, I mean "Hey, check out my boat, lets go have sex in that alleyway" only works the first dozen times.

Cayenne~

Offline dubheasa

Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9582 on: August 07, 2014, 03:41:47 PM »
Cayenne... listen!
This thing between you and I, however special you have made feel during all those time...
it's never gonna work out!
Things have been so spicy, so hot, and yet I am just not in the mental state for something serious at the moment!
I don't want to hurt your feelings, but I am not able to give you what you need at the moment.
Im sorry, honey!

Offline saphireMARIE

Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9583 on: August 07, 2014, 05:59:16 PM »
Dubheasa,

I do like you and all, I think we would be perfect.
If I could say your name.
Do you know how bad it is to say 'that one' to my parents when I panic ?

Sorry beautiful.
Saph

Offline Nachtmahr

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Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9584 on: August 07, 2014, 06:33:06 PM »
Dear Saphy.

It's not you.. It's me!
It's just.. The way your shirt is always so close to falling right off that perfectly sculpted chest of yours? I'm sorry, it's just.. It's too much! I am only mortal.
I'd love it if I could still be their friend though.

Uh, your friend! I meant you, not them. Sorry.
« Last Edit: August 07, 2014, 06:34:22 PM by Nachtmahr »

Offline Kitsunetsuki

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Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9585 on: August 08, 2014, 12:29:50 AM »
Darling Red, you swore to me that no butterflies were harmed in the making of your avatar. But, I have since learned that's not true & that the butterflies were later used and abused in the latest James Cameron movie, Lepidop-Terra. I just don't know what to believe anymore. I'm sorry, but we're through...

Offline Nachtmahr

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Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9586 on: August 08, 2014, 12:53:23 AM »
Dear Kitsune.

I'm sorry, but our time together has just not been the same since you sprained your entire buttock.

I'm sorry, but no functional buttock means no Nachtmahr for you.

*Rides off*

Offline dubheasa

Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9587 on: August 08, 2014, 01:39:05 PM »
Red... sorry! This isn't working out! I either burn my fingers on you, little flaming bird, or have to cough when you dissipate into ashes.
I have a SERIOUS dust allergy. So I'm sorry, but I cannot stand the situation as it is!
Hope you understand!

Online Cayenne

Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9588 on: August 08, 2014, 03:38:09 PM »
Dearest Dubheasa.

I know you'd figured our torrent love affair would last forever, but the sad reality is that if you sleep with letters, you wake up with paper cuts!  So, I think it's in my best interest to free up a space for someone who sends pictures with their eloquent prose! I'm sorry! I just, yearn for my physical contact than a manila envelope can provide!

I hope you can come to understand.

...As you know my mailing address, and personal habits.

Cayenne~

Offline Boatman

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Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9589 on: August 08, 2014, 03:50:55 PM »
Always that stare suggesting, 'you didn't put the cat out' (even though we don't have a cat).
Or... 'I would have loved flowers just this once' (despite your extensive allergies).
Or ... 'Shit, lets make passionate love on the couch' (irrespective of your mother coming round to inspect everything in the morning).

Life is just too tense... sorry.

Bye Pepper.

Offline Dys Astyr

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Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9590 on: August 08, 2014, 04:31:02 PM »
Fondest greetings Mr. Boat,

It pains me that it has come to this. I did so enjoy our time together, but who are we fooling, we both knew it wouldn't last. I am a villain and you are an agent tasked with stopping me, such things are just not meant to be. On top of which I kept finding you trying to eat my pets and you blew up more than one of my hide outs, spoiled several of my schemes and killed countless of my minions. So, what is a villain to do? It's simply not responsible for us to carry on like this anymore. Soon they will start questioning your loyalties and we all know what happens after that.

So farewell Boat, I shall always cherish the scars.
Fondest memories~
Syk

P.S. This message will self destruct in 3... 2... 1...

Offline Boatman

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Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9591 on: August 08, 2014, 04:53:24 PM »
You had me all wrong from the start. I just popped in to help you (destroy civilisation as we know it). I got rid of the members of your security team, because, well, I didnít think they were up to the job (btw they arenít now).

Mostly though, I fancied taking you to the casino and staking everything for you, knowing that if I lost Iíd, eventually (after a very long time), get over the winner taking you as a prize. But if I won, weíd at least have some happiness together until the helos arrived to take you away.

Unfortunately, theyíve taken you away early. But, Iíll do everything I can...

Offline blue bunny sparkle

Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9592 on: August 18, 2014, 10:05:51 PM »
Dear Boatman,
When you said boat, I thought you meant yacht.
When you said you wanted booty, I thought you meant actual boo-tay.
When you said your oar was massive I thought... well, you know.

And now, you appear to be a spy.

These inconsistences confuse me.

I'm leaving at the next port!

Offline Boatman

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Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9593 on: August 19, 2014, 01:42:50 AM »
Dearest BBS,

You are a bit uppity for a stowaway who hid in a cake and twirled out unexpectedly.

You've been wined and dined and preened and I was getting to quite like you.

But it really is not quite etiquette, sweet fluffy lady, to excuse oneself in the middle of a round of port.

I am afraid my intentions towards you are entirely honourable.

I've left some make up and a mirror in the lifeboat.
A cruise ship will be passing this way shortly and chances are they'll pick you up.

Bon voyage.


Offline Boatman

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Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9594 on: August 19, 2014, 01:55:22 AM »
 ;D

Red,
When we met on line, you didn't disclose everything did you?
The cyber was fantastic.
Yeah, the age was right.. and wow, you are even more beautiful in the flesh.
But it was your touch.
So soft, delicate... all over my body, all at once.
Until I realised it wasn't you at all.
I cringe even now at the thought... after months of therapy.
It was't your fingers brushing my skin, stimulating such passion and excitement. It was your trained beasts (I haven't missed an 'r' out BTW).
You hid that that you were a secret lepidopterist.

Time for some more shock treatment..


Offline Vill

Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9595 on: August 19, 2014, 02:10:23 AM »
Vessleguy,

I don't know what "lepidopterist" means, and frankly I think you think I don't think I'm as smart as you'd like to think I am.

So, this is goodbye.

P.S. all your stuff in on my front lawn via a hasty descent from our second story bedroom window.

Offline blue bunny sparkle

Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9596 on: August 19, 2014, 09:11:26 AM »
Vill...

Seriously.

Comb your hair dude.

Just. Comb it.

The windswept look is so last year.

Bunny

Offline Rhedyn

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Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9597 on: August 19, 2014, 02:50:52 PM »
Bunny... seriously... if I've told you once I've told you hundred times, don't take my handcuffs. You know what? Just keep them. I just... can't be with someone who takes my stuff all the time.

Offline Boatman

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Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9598 on: August 19, 2014, 03:23:39 PM »
We joyfully shared our love of naturism and nature and each other, deeply, again and (as far as I can recall, again).
But now I can see from what's stuck in your hair you have been ferreting around in my tomato plants.
And not for the first time.
I mean, I knew you were a vegetarian, but chomping my prize fruit and veg through the night... no way!
Our beautiful season together is done.

Offline dubheasa

Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9599 on: August 20, 2014, 03:09:32 PM »
You know... I could stand you being in the garden all the damn time. I could even stand the smell of soil underneath your fingernails. I have no problem with having to vacuum the flat every single goddamn day, because you always forget to take of your shoes.
But.... I will not, ever, get the living earthworms out of the pockets of your garden pants before washing again!
Really! THIS is disgusting! Oh, and not to mention the snail I found in the dryer.
We. are. done!