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Author Topic: Breakup with the person above you!  (Read 327296 times)

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Offline impishcharm

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Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9125 on: February 06, 2014, 03:34:13 PM »
Dearest Vill,

As I write this, my fingers tremble and there's tears in my eyes. This isn't easy for me, since we've had so much fun together. But, I just don't see us working out. You see, you hate Oreos, and insist on keeping the "devil cookies" out of our home. I feel like I've been given an ultimatum... you or the Oreos. I guess you can tell which I will choose.

I'm taking the kids and moving to my parents' house.

Farewell,

-Imp

Offline ChicagoOkie

Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9126 on: February 06, 2014, 04:37:31 PM »
Imp, what can I say? You are amazing, but you never look me in the eyes. Not even when we're making love. I need eye contact.

*Walks away.*

Offline impishcharm

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Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9127 on: February 06, 2014, 04:42:07 PM »
Wait! I'll look you in the eyes! I'll stare holes right into your brain if you want!  :'(

I need a man who wears pants, anyway.  ::)


Offline Vill

Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9128 on: February 06, 2014, 04:44:32 PM »
This incessant demand for donning pants is the final straw for me, Imp. So what if we have company over? A man should be able to walk around naked in the comfort of his own castle when ever he chooses.

Good bye Imp, hello textile freedom!

Offline ChicagoOkie

Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9129 on: February 06, 2014, 04:50:00 PM »
Look, I don't have a problem with you walking around naked, but you did it infront of my mom.

I'm going back to the imp.

Offline impishcharm

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Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9130 on: February 06, 2014, 05:13:18 PM »
I'm better than being someone's second choice.  >:(

I'm going to fly solo for a while.

Offline DTW

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Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9131 on: February 06, 2014, 06:25:27 PM »
Not into imps. Sorry. Fairies are more my type.

Offline flassche

Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9132 on: February 06, 2014, 07:14:44 PM »
You could shatter Iron on those abs!

I am afraid I simply cannot trust you around my personal belongings anymore.

Offline impishcharm

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Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9133 on: February 06, 2014, 08:08:48 PM »
Flassche, my love, it is time to end it. I am tired of finding household items burnt to smithereens. God forbid I serve you anything spicy or combustible. Plus, when you kiss me it burns my tongue. You gave a whole new meaning to "set my loins on fire".

Offline Rolo

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Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9134 on: February 07, 2014, 06:48:20 AM »
Impy my love....you charm is quite beguiling and you bang like no other....but alas I ran into your mother....

Offline impishcharm

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Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9135 on: February 07, 2014, 10:39:22 AM »
Rolo...Rolo...wherefore art thou Rolo? Inside my mother, that's where!  >:(

That's fine. You are closer to her age, anyway.  ::)

Offline Rolo

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Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9136 on: February 07, 2014, 11:35:46 AM »
Impy my dear, your love I will always cherish but without the trust fund I am afraid we will perish...

Offline Rapt

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Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9137 on: February 07, 2014, 12:39:51 PM »
Oh Rolo..how I wish there was more than a sweet center to you....because all the girls love you...and my jealousy is just too much....now..I gotta eat you!

Offline Rolo

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Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9138 on: February 07, 2014, 01:08:23 PM »
Rapt my darling lady, I am afraid that there not enough of you to share therefore I shall have to let you B.  ;)

Offline Vill

Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9139 on: February 07, 2014, 05:02:09 PM »
Rolo, your kind heart and insightful mind are not enough to keep me satisfied: I've found the same in another taughtly wrapped, vixen-esque package.

I'm leaving you for someone with an Impish charm.   

Offline Jazra

Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9140 on: February 08, 2014, 09:19:41 AM »
Vill,

Had this whole sexy Star Trek themed weekend planned! Even got you a sexy Spock costume,



Imagine my horror when I found out that Star Trek is on your never list. Thankfully, the Papa John's delivery guy fit into the costume.

Ciao,


Jazz

Offline Bedroom Lazarus

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Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9141 on: February 09, 2014, 07:32:45 PM »
It could never have worked out between the two of us.  I'm a priest and you tend to make chalk looked sunburned.

I wish it could have been something special.

Offline inflatetress

Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9142 on: February 09, 2014, 08:41:49 PM »
Uhhhhm yeah...I totally thought that was a Halloween costume ???

Offline Syanyte

Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9143 on: February 09, 2014, 08:43:33 PM »
Pink Pink Pink that's all you wear is pink I can't take it any more. ~pulls at own hair~ Sorry but I need more color in my life.

Offline annarose

Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9144 on: February 10, 2014, 02:12:01 AM »
sorry. you just lick everything too much. it can't work out.

Offline Bedroom Lazarus

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Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9145 on: February 10, 2014, 02:21:47 AM »
Alas dear Anna.

Hot did our passions burn.

But when you said you wanted to preform the nutcracker,  I misguidedly assumed it was the ballet.

I need ice...a very large bag of ice.

Offline Jazra

Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9146 on: February 10, 2014, 10:04:47 AM »
We're like broken up. So umm when you see me outside your rectory staring in, when you get sixty texts an hour from me, when I Fedex you my underwear, when I visit your parents and introduce myself as your fiance, when I write the pope on your behalf and ask when priests will be able to marry, this is just me letting you go ... really slowly.

Priests are so f'ing hot. But we're over. Really. I mean it this time. Starbucks at 9?

Offline Stone

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Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9147 on: February 10, 2014, 11:52:08 AM »
D'you remember that one time you bought that one thing?

Yeah?

I didn't like it. G'bye!

Offline ChicagoOkie

Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9148 on: February 10, 2014, 04:42:16 PM »
I like choking women as much as the next guy, but this is getting ridiculous. You keep pretending to be Jack the Ripper and seeking out prostitutes. I just can't handle it anymore. Don't take this the wrong way, but your nucking futs. Adios!

Offline Jazra

Re: Breakup with the person above you!
« Reply #9149 on: February 10, 2014, 05:11:34 PM »
Look,

You think I'm trying to take away your darn kilt! But when I offer a reasonable variation, you snigger and growl no F'ing way! I'll let you know that your dad thinks my outfit suggestions are super cute:



Honestly, I don't see us working out long term, especially now that your dad and I have moved in together.