Thoughts Tossed Into the Void (LF GM/Partner)

[Terian]

I've been lurking for a good while, dipped my toes in here and there, and...

Well, to be honest, on the whole, haven't had a great deal of luck on the topic of finding a suitable game.  Either Real Life Concerns end up getting in the way on one side or the other, I find myself pushed out because certain expectations in the game weren't made more clear, or just differing priorities with the group ended up having me go my own way.

Which is a little bit of a disappointment but that's just how it all works.

I had a thread a while back that covered an idea that I wanted to roll with, but in hindsight, being so specific was probably working against me--and I found most attention tended to want to either hijack the idea for their own purposes, or expected me to GM for them.  And besides, the whole thing is years old at this point and due for a complete rewrite regardless.

So

Preamble out of the way, let's get into details of what kind of writer I am and what kind of games I'm hoping for.

To begin with, I consider myself an adequate journeyman writer.  I'd never manage to make any real money off the back of my skills, but I can generally stay afloat outside of the most punishing and demanding environments.  I have a preference to maintain strong character voices, but suffer somewhat in my ability to describe the environment--mostly because I struggle to visualize things in the first place due to my aphantasia.  This is why I will always prefer to participate as a 'Player' in an environment controlled and managed by somebody else, though I am perfectly fine with participating in worldbuilding (I'd even say the worldbuilding is often my favorite part of a game or story!).

The greatest difficulty for me in terms of finding a partner to work with however?  (Aside from my general discomfort at trying to 'Be the GM'), pretty much boils down to one thing that's readily gotten me ridiculed or dismissed--to the extent of 'Why are you even here if you don't care for this?')

To wit?  The consummation part of the sexytimes is the least interesting part to me.

Full stop, I don't really care about that.  I don't mind some steamy stuff going on, and depending on the context, it can even add to what I like to see.  But my goals aren't "Get my protagonist naked by the fastest mechanism possible and have them getting screwed in every hole, with maybe a slight delay if we want to play with corruption themes, but generally speaking."

I like running female characters in these games--it's a fun way of getting around my own hangups as a person and keeping my own feelings from bleeding too strongly into a game, but I also don't want them to exist as vessels for titillation.  Put in perilous situations?  Yes!  Sure!  Have wild and crazy adventures?  Wonderful!  Strip at the first sign of someone suitable and spend the next few thousand words banging them?  Pass.

That doesn't mean I'm against the more lewd-type environments or settings.  But my interest in those are purely to explore the dissonance of what happens when the porn logic doesn't automatically win thanks to exerting godlike powers to get its way.  I disdain mind control as a theme on the whole, and I hate omnipotent environments taking the quickest route to a quickie imaginable.  I want to see a setting where the cute lady scientist drops into an unexplored planet that exists to do dirty things to the people who land on it.  And then walks away with chastity intact despite the setting's best efforts because she had the good sense to come in an environmentally sealed power suit and didn't just open the visor at the first opportunity to get nailed by the magic pheremones and convinced to strip down, and the setting didn't have magical clothes-dissolving solutions that handwave such problems away.

Adventure and Peril are things I like, and I have a firm appreciation of the female form.  For some reason, this is intensified when they're covered head to toe in something--be it plate armor or an environment suit, with just the hint of features beneath it showing there's a person involved.  A "You can look but you can't touch" feeling maybe?  I don't know, I just know that I like it.

A few examples for reference.

Fantasyish

Futuristic

A few plot seeds of course wouldn't go amiss.  There's always the previously mentioned 'Stranded on a hostile world and racing to survive a scary environment', I'm also fond of dungeon crawls and more traditional adventure stories however.  The key points are that the protagonist here is not a victim.  That even when stuck in a fungal pit with rapidly declining oxygen supplies, that the heroine just goes "Welp I'll just open my helmet and accept it".  That even when cornered by a demon swarm, she keeps fighting back and doesn't get just 'Clubbed in the side of the head and taken home'.

(Also, I'll admit that something that I find super hot would be a protagonist in a cursed suit of armor that protects her from all comers, but functionally acts as a full body vibrator in response to damage, doubly so if she doesn't have the option to just take it off for a while to cool down for reasons.  Unfortunately, most interpretations of this tend to involve tentacles, which I'm decidedly neutral on.)

Probably just going to get ignored, but it doesn't hurt to give these kinds of things a shot once in a while, no?

If you have any questions or comments--or god willing, interest--you can send me a PM and I'll get back to you as soon as I can and we can hash out any desired details to whatever degree of fidelity you're looking for.