Please tell me there's more; or I can just add some too. And I'm one of the 20% of men who won't mix Clorox and brake fluid. BTW, are you sure it's Clorox, or the bleach inside Clorox? Because I know ammonia and bleach make a knockout gas when mixed together. Try filling up a couple of water balloons with that mixture and you'll never have to stress out about getting your kids to sleep!
26.) Even though they're a cartoon the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles are real. Because it's never the kid's fault, right?
27.) Every single question in the world has one answer: "I don't know."
28.) It's not okay for the kids to lie to you but it's okay for you to lie to them. But it's all good because you were lied to by your parents and your kids will in turn lie to their own kids.
29.) There is no such thing as 'hours of operation' with anything anywhere ever. At least in kids' minds.
30.) Time and space flow differently when you have kids. That's why you never wake up at the same time as them.
31.) Kids are cute when people don't have them.
32.) It's never you yelling and spanking your kid in the checkout stand, it's always someone else. You're just the babysitter, right?
33.) It does not need to be raining for the interior of the house to be demolished.