Looking for input

Started by PennySludt, November 16, 2017, 01:01:51 PM

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PennySludt

I don't know how to knit, but knitting came up in my NaNoWriMo novel and I wrote what I can tell from pictures. But I'm hoping a knitter can give it a read and tell me if it sounds right?




Mildred gave her an approving nod, as if praising Bitty’s ownership of her preference. It gave Bitty a surprising feeling of pleasure; that simple nod. She smiled. Her eyes followed the woman’s hands as she picked up a ball of purple yarn and began knotting it and looping it over one of the needles, then handed it to Bitty.

“There. Now, hold it like this, your forefingers over the top to hold the yarn and your other fingers back here to keep the string out of the way. Push the right tip under the loop there and make an ‘X’...good...now wrap the loose string around that end. No, the other one. There, that’s it. Okay, now the tricky part. Use that ‘X’ to slide the loop over the end and then tug the string gently.”
May Evaporate Without Warning, But It Doesn't Mean I've Dropped The Game! I'll Always Notify If I Don't Want To Continue!

Oniya

Sounds like you're describing putting the first stitch on the needle, which is basically making a slip-knot.  One thing you might want to do is hit up YouTube for a few instructional videos - not for the images, but for the voice-overs.  You can also 'describe' knitting without going into quite so much detail - Agatha Christie did this often in her Miss Marple mysteries.  The 'average reader' doesn't need to be able to learn how to knit from your description; they just need to know that Mildred is teaching Bitty to knit.
"Language was invented for one reason, boys - to woo women.~*~*~Don't think it's all been done before
And in that endeavor, laziness will not do." ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~Don't think we're never gonna win this war
Robin Williams-Dead Poets Society ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~Don't think your world's gonna fall apart
I do have a cause, though.  It's obscenity.  I'm for it.  - Tom Lehrer~*~All you need is your beautiful heart
O/O's Updated 5/11/21 - A/A's - Current Status! (Oct 31) - Writing a novel - all draws for Fool of Fire up! Requests closed

PennySludt

Who said my readers are average?? ;)

But I'm trying to push my word count that's a good point :P Maybe I'll look up some of those descriptions of hers too, for an idea. Thanks :D
May Evaporate Without Warning, But It Doesn't Mean I've Dropped The Game! I'll Always Notify If I Don't Want To Continue!

Oniya

Oh, you can get wordy - the feel of the yarn, the sound of the needles - the inevitable tangled mess of a first try...  I'm just saying you don't have to write a tutorial.  ;D
"Language was invented for one reason, boys - to woo women.~*~*~Don't think it's all been done before
And in that endeavor, laziness will not do." ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~Don't think we're never gonna win this war
Robin Williams-Dead Poets Society ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~Don't think your world's gonna fall apart
I do have a cause, though.  It's obscenity.  I'm for it.  - Tom Lehrer~*~All you need is your beautiful heart
O/O's Updated 5/11/21 - A/A's - Current Status! (Oct 31) - Writing a novel - all draws for Fool of Fire up! Requests closed

PennySludt

Hahaha! Well, the only I'd know for sure out of all that is the tangle part! :D
May Evaporate Without Warning, But It Doesn't Mean I've Dropped The Game! I'll Always Notify If I Don't Want To Continue!

Oniya

Heh - fake it!  Is the yarn fluffy or smooth?  What color? (or multicolored?)  Does the ball of yarn escape - and is there an animal around to chase it?
"Language was invented for one reason, boys - to woo women.~*~*~Don't think it's all been done before
And in that endeavor, laziness will not do." ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~Don't think we're never gonna win this war
Robin Williams-Dead Poets Society ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~Don't think your world's gonna fall apart
I do have a cause, though.  It's obscenity.  I'm for it.  - Tom Lehrer~*~All you need is your beautiful heart
O/O's Updated 5/11/21 - A/A's - Current Status! (Oct 31) - Writing a novel - all draws for Fool of Fire up! Requests closed

PennySludt

Hahaha! You're awesome! Okay, thanks! Maybe she should have a cat.... :D
May Evaporate Without Warning, But It Doesn't Mean I've Dropped The Game! I'll Always Notify If I Don't Want To Continue!