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Author Topic: Last Poster Wins  (Read 93016 times)

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Offline syk

Re: Last Poster Wins
« Reply #3425 on: August 03, 2014, 08:43:15 AM »
(Oh my various and sometimes fictional gods, your way too good at being Bond.  ;D Laughing so hard and wanting to rewatch the films.)

Is leisurely riding her Ulrtavillainous Flying Object, win still safely in pocket


Offline Boatman

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Re: Last Poster Wins
« Reply #3426 on: August 03, 2014, 09:43:54 AM »
“Hello Mr Boat,” squeaks the robotic voice of the android girl in the space plane. “I’m Trudy your Google drive autopilot. Give me the coordinates and I’ll fly you there in a trice…”
The robot pilot flutters her ‘synthoreal’ (™) eyelashes. “Neat hair Mr Boat, if I may say.”
Boat frowns, ruffling his hair, and scans the buttons on the controls.
“What are you doing, James?” Then switching to silky voice prog. “You can push my buttons later.”
Boat finds the ejector seat button and presses firmly.
Whoosh!
"J a  a   a     a     m     m    m  e         s.............."
Crump!
Silence.

Offline syk

Re: Last Poster Wins
« Reply #3427 on: August 03, 2014, 10:27:01 AM »
The U.F.O. pitches to one side with the added weight of a meddlesome secret agent landing on it, she quickly adjusts, lowering on of the windows so she can yell at him over the wind.

What are you doing Mr. Boat?

Offline Kitsunetsuki

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Re: Last Poster Wins
« Reply #3428 on: August 03, 2014, 11:12:35 AM »
All this time, and you still don't realize the win is mine? tsk tsk :P

Offline Boatman

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Re: Last Poster Wins
« Reply #3429 on: August 03, 2014, 05:28:17 PM »
The U.F.O. pitches to one side with the added weight of a meddlesome secret agent landing on it, she quickly adjusts, lowering on of the windows so she can yell at him over the wind.

What are you doing Mr. Boat?

Boat has pressed the wrong ejector seat button and has just ten seconds of air left.
"He signs, I have an urgent message for you, Dr Girlfriend. Oh and let me re-pressurise you before you lose consciousness as I'd hoped to join you for dinner. I've brought Martini."

Offline syk

Re: Last Poster Wins
« Reply #3430 on: August 03, 2014, 05:35:48 PM »
Tips the U.F.O. so that Boat rolls inside, then rolls the window back up

You stomped on my withered, black feelings once already, why should I have dinner with you?

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Re: Last Poster Wins
« Reply #3431 on: August 03, 2014, 05:47:50 PM »
Tips the U.F.O. so that Boat rolls inside, then rolls the window back up

You stomped on my withered, black feelings once already, why should I have dinner with you?

"They certainly don't look withered from here, Dr G and I have modest experience in this area.
And because I am going to make the dinner ... and do the washing up.
Unheard of for a secret agent."
Tries to find appropriate music track.

Offline syk

Re: Last Poster Wins
« Reply #3432 on: August 03, 2014, 05:54:33 PM »
Cook and clean? Well this offer sounds more and more tempting. Do I get to hassle you while this happens? piques eyebrow

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Re: Last Poster Wins
« Reply #3433 on: August 03, 2014, 06:17:08 PM »
Cook and clean? Well this offer sounds more and more tempting. Do I get to hassle you while this happens? piques eyebrow

"Oh, alright, but nothing about shoes or handbags. " Surreptitiously puts in ear plugs.

Offline syk

Re: Last Poster Wins
« Reply #3434 on: August 03, 2014, 06:22:11 PM »
Chuckles because he thinks she meant verbal harassment  >:)

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Re: Last Poster Wins
« Reply #3435 on: August 04, 2014, 01:39:54 AM »
Boat whistles 'Rule Britannia' to himself as taught in anti-harassment classes. And smiles. "It's good to be back, Dr G. They don't know I am really working for you... Now, where's your new dastardly hideout, so I can tempt you with something meaty."

Offline syk

Re: Last Poster Wins
« Reply #3436 on: August 04, 2014, 01:43:41 AM »
I think your toying with my stomach Mr. Boat, can you really cook?  :P

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Re: Last Poster Wins
« Reply #3437 on: August 04, 2014, 01:50:50 AM »
So my win?

Offline syk

Re: Last Poster Wins
« Reply #3438 on: August 04, 2014, 01:52:47 AM »
Um, no.  ;D

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Re: Last Poster Wins
« Reply #3439 on: August 04, 2014, 11:03:10 AM »
"I'll tell you what, Dr Girlfriend. You have had a busy day, a bad day in many respects. Just let me pour you a drink - whiskey I believe (if our files are up to date). Then, whilst you relax, I will find your kitchen, and I will prepare something special (even if I have to catch and kill it myself). And, of course, I will tidy up afterwards so no one will even guess I have been there. Sound good for you?"

Offline syk

Re: Last Poster Wins
« Reply #3440 on: August 04, 2014, 11:06:46 AM »
You had me at drink.  :P (If I catch you near my shark tank you will regret being in the kitchen where all the knives are though.)

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Re: Last Poster Wins
« Reply #3441 on: August 04, 2014, 11:41:18 AM »
Having added the mild sedative to Dr G's drink and watch her sip and swallow, Boat leaves palatial villainous lounge suite and heads for the kitchens (discovered by nose).  Once in a clear passageway, he turns on the Win detector app on his phone. It flashes indicating the Win is close by. He quickly cancels the Boat music the phone is trying to play.

Offline syk

Re: Last Poster Wins
« Reply #3442 on: August 04, 2014, 11:44:48 AM »
Had the Win surgically implanted under her skin to prevent casual theft by treacherous double agents, its programmed to explode if it stops registering her vitals

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Re: Last Poster Wins
« Reply #3443 on: August 04, 2014, 12:02:55 PM »
Blips lead Boat back to slumped, but smiling evilly, Dr G. He looks for way to remove Win implant. Sighs, ties G up and hoists her over his (powerful) shoulder. Muses, 'Guess it's going to be a stylish dive out of window. Not done one of those for a while.'

Offline syk

Re: Last Poster Wins
« Reply #3444 on: August 04, 2014, 12:07:33 PM »
(Your kidnapping me? I thought I was supposed to be the bad guy in this story! :O )

Wakes up when they hit the water, as her hideout is Spider Skull Island (naturally). Her faithful pet sharks chew through the ropes, freeing her.

Tsk, tsk, Boat. Shouldn't make promises your not gonna deliver on.

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Re: Last Poster Wins
« Reply #3445 on: August 04, 2014, 03:34:26 PM »
Boat almost exhausts himself fighting sharks before drifting onto a nearby sandy beach. He crawls up the sand and just has time to utter, "Great workout...," before collapsing unconscious.

Offline syk

Re: Last Poster Wins
« Reply #3446 on: August 04, 2014, 03:36:30 PM »
Wonders why her guest decided to get out of the water so fast, as she pets one of the sharks

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Re: Last Poster Wins
« Reply #3447 on: August 04, 2014, 03:39:38 PM »
Still unconscious.

Offline syk

Re: Last Poster Wins
« Reply #3448 on: August 04, 2014, 03:52:46 PM »
Pokes Mr. Boat with a stick wondering if he is alive

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Re: Last Poster Wins
« Reply #3449 on: August 04, 2014, 04:01:06 PM »
"Ah," Boat shakes head. "Just fancied playing with your pets."