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Author Topic: Elderly Lizard Finally Gets Funky  (Read 902 times)

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Offline Spookie MonsterTopic starter

Elderly Lizard Finally Gets Funky
« on: August 09, 2008, 05:27:57 PM »
Caution: This post may totally turn you on.

So apparently there's this 110-year-old tuatara, Henry, who finally met the love of his life -- another tuatara, Mildred, "whose age is estimated between 70 and 80."  It's sort of an October-December romance, I guess.  They've since produced fertile eggs.  No word as to whether the spirit of Barry White was involved.

Lizard love: 110-year dinosaur descendant to become daddy

The beginning of Henry's libido rebound came in 2002, when veterinarians realized that a lump in the animal's nether regions was a cancerous tumor.  They removed it and, over the next few years, his attitude began to change.

"I say that he had a personality transplant at the same time," Hazley said Thursday.  "If I had a tumor underneath my [genitals], when girls were passing by, I'd be a very grumpy boy too."


Many congratulations to Henry and Mildred!

Spel

Offline ShrowdedPoet

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Re: Elderly Lizard Finally Gets Funky
« Reply #1 on: August 11, 2008, 09:39:01 AM »
Awwww, YAY!  Baby lizards!!!  *sticks cigar in expectant fathers mouth*

Offline Ket

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Re: Elderly Lizard Finally Gets Funky
« Reply #2 on: August 11, 2008, 12:20:52 PM »
"If I had a tumor underneath my [genitals], when girls were passing by, I'd be a very grumpy boy too."


That's just classic!  What a wonderful story.  To think, all those years, sexless...
Good thing he can live to be 200!

Offline Spookie MonsterTopic starter

Re: Elderly Lizard Finally Gets Funky
« Reply #3 on: August 12, 2008, 04:38:36 AM »
"If I had a tumor underneath my [genitals], when girls were passing by, I'd be a very grumpy boy too."

One thing that I like about that quote is the fact that the author of the article was compelled to surround "genitals" with brackets; it seems possible that Mr. Hazley used a more colorful term!

Spel

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Re: Elderly Lizard Finally Gets Funky
« Reply #4 on: August 12, 2008, 02:12:30 PM »
I like color. . .

Offline Sabby

Re: Elderly Lizard Finally Gets Funky
« Reply #5 on: August 24, 2008, 05:09:44 PM »
...for a moment there I read this wrong. I thought the story was about vets mistaking the lizards testicles for tumors.

Offline Spookie MonsterTopic starter

Re: Elderly Lizard Finally Gets Funky
« Reply #6 on: August 27, 2008, 04:28:05 PM »
...for a moment there I read this wrong. I thought the story was about vets mistaking the lizards testicles for tumors.

Heh!  Actually, that sometimes happens when people examine male rabbits -- the rabbits' testicles are in front of their penises and rather resemble strange bumps on their bellies.  Hopefully nobody tries to remove them!

Spel

Offline Sabby

Re: Elderly Lizard Finally Gets Funky
« Reply #7 on: August 27, 2008, 08:46:22 PM »
God forbid... we wouldn't want rabbits to stop breeding  ::)