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Author Topic: Masks (deilweg x Harlome)  (Read 816 times)

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Offline deilwegTopic starter

Masks (deilweg x Harlome)
« on: September 06, 2012, 02:50:22 AM »
He was the odd one among the others.

There was the one who juggled with fire and there was the one who played with the lions. There was the one who played the lover boy to her and there was him who always lost her to the lover boy. He wore the mask of perpetual sadness. He has to ride his uni-cycle into the stage, she would gracefully fly down from her swing in the sky. He would fall down from the uni-cycle. The flowers he carried always tended to crush up and whither away when he fell. He would go close to her and give her the crushed flowers which she would look with disdain. He would carry the tiny petals and try to stick it back together, turn to the audience and show how it wont stick back. There will be laughter all around.

In comes the lover boy who would run him over with his glittering motorcycle with it's strange lights. The audience will laugh at him getting run over. He would stop near her and kiss her hand. She would croon all over the lover boy, as she gets behind his motor bike. The looser, that is him, would get up and try to grab at her. The lover boy would kick him away and they will ride off. He would try to stand up and he would be missing his arm. The audience will laugh more. His perpetual sad face would always be the sad face of him that everyone would see. He never dared to take that mask off until he was back in his little shabby tent. It is not like his manager couldn't afford it, it is just that he was insignificant to them. There were many others who could play the clown who falls down and get beaten up by the other clown who was the hunk and who got the girl.

He exited the stage and walked past the others. No one noticed. He sat by the corner until his name was called. He waited for a long time. He was always the last one to be called.

"Hey you! No idea what you are called. Come and get your money!" someone shouted.

"My name is Joey" said the looser to himself and walked down to the counter. He took whatever measly money they gave him and walked back to his tent.

The big show tent behind him glowed in raucous laughter and music - a late night party, he thought - but that is never for him. He got into his dingy tent and sat down on his bed. He looked up to see himself in the mirror in front of him. Sadness was all that it shown. He realised then how much he hated that mask. Right next to him was that rare photo and the person in it for whom he still stuck to this miserable place. He switched off the lights in his tent and plopped on to the pillow - feeling more miserable than before.

Behind him the "Gemini Circus" sign flickered red, green and orange.
« Last Edit: September 08, 2012, 01:39:57 PM by deilweg »

Offline Harlome

Re: Masks (deilweg x Harlome)
« Reply #1 on: September 06, 2012, 12:25:04 PM »
Although Mina was to act like she enjoyed the company of her 'lover boy' she truly didn't find him all that appealing. Sure, he was physically attractive but in her opinion he was as dumb as a bag of bricks. After the show was over and everyone was getting paid for the night, she took her earnings, put them in to the top of her spandex suit that was black on her left side and white on her right while pulling on the elastic to let loose her sandy blond hair that swayed well past her shoulders. Mina quietly slipped in to her tent, pulled out the money to put it in her safe spot and began to peel the suit from her slender, lean frame. Intent on at least making an appearance at the party she wrapped her soft pink silken robe up tightly and sat in front of her vanity, removing the more dramatic of her eye makeup, while leaving some to look good without looking like a circus performer anymore.

She enjoyed the circus life, but was getting tired of playing the fake romance. Mina wanted the real deal now, the over exaggerated expressions of desire, of love were starting to make her feel sick every time she had to play it. Her face on the outside was full of happiness that her 'lover boy' had come to her rescue, to take her away somewhere for them to be in love yet her face on the inside was grimacing at the thought of having to lie day after day while truly being unsatisfied.

Mina watched herself in the mirror and sighed a lonely sigh, deciding that she was too upset to attend the late night celebration. She worked to remove the rest of her make up, revealing the smooth and creamy white skin of her face, and the eye shadow that made her icy blue eyes really pop. She wanted more in her life, she just didn't know how or where to get it.  The Gemini Circus had always treated her well, but maybe it was time for something else? She chuckled to herself as she brushed her hair, thinking it's rather strange to run from the circus to join the rest of society...

She shook the thought from her head as this was all she truly knew, and snuggled in to her bed with a long sigh. Hopefully with a good night's rest she would feel better and forget about being lonely or wanting to leave.

Offline deilwegTopic starter

Re: Masks (deilweg x Harlome)
« Reply #2 on: September 07, 2012, 02:53:20 AM »
He woke up quite early next morning. It was his day off, and typically that means she also gets her day off, and so will many others including the "lover boy". His traditional routine tends to be wander around and avoid everyone in the process if possible.

The circus has been in this town for a few weeks now, and few weeks later it is probably a new town. His favourite place in this town was the riverside - a few minutes walk from where the circus has camped. He sat up on his bed and looked into the mirror. "No masks for today" he thought and prepared for his morning stuff. Breakfast is usually served in the circus canteen for everyone, but today he would like to be by the riverside. He finished his early morning duties, dressed up and started walking towards it. It was a bit chilly for this time of the year, but he didn't mind. His legs usually took him to some of the most secluded and undisturbed places. It didn't fail him this time too.

The river was flowing gently in front of him. The bench he sat on felt a bit cold, but he was not a stickler for that anyway. He sat there gazing at the river with his bag of breakfast. This should get him through most of the day without having to set foot into the circus. While he sat there he reminisced - about his now dead family, leaving him an orphan at 10. What he could remember of them made him happy. His father was hard working, gentle and kind to everyone. His mother a loving presence wherever she was. Everything was wonderful until that day...he paused, not wanting to remember that day.

He was taken in by his aunt, who "sold" him to another of his uncles. He was wretched, an abuser, an alcoholic who owned a shop that sells fake medicines in the name of traditional herbal remedies. He could never remember a day when he did not come into his room drunk and beat him and curse at him.

He would huddle in a corner of the room after his uncle was finished with him, away from any light, and wait for his uncle to go to sleep - like that winter night a few years ago. That was the day when he knew he had had enough of his uncle. He sneaked into the kitchen and took the biggest knife he could find there. He also found the wooden bat in the corner and took it with him, just in case. He stepped into his uncle's room and stood by his bed for a few moments - building up his courage. He was sure of it. He had to do it. He lifted his knife up as far as he could do and plunged it into his uncle's chest. The monster woke up choking and blabbering - it's hand trying to seek the knife stuck in his chest, trying to get it out.

"No, you don't" he thought and pummeled the monster's head with the thick bat. He didn't know how many times he did - but he wanted to be bloody sure the monster won't wake up again.

Sitting by that riverside, munching into his sandwich, he felt his eyes well up unconsciously. He was sure it was not his uncle he was crying for, it was something else. He sat there watching a family of ducks swimming gracefully through the river. For some reason, his mind calmed down watching them.

Somewhere behind he heard a familiar sound amongst a lot of giggles, laughter and chatter. He turned around to see a few of the circus people there and with them, her too. He quickly collected his things and stood up and was about to leave when he heard it. He heard someone in that group yell out.

"Oye, you!" he heard. "Joey!" he heard someone else call him. He looked around and a few people from the group were pointing at him. He turned around and walked as if not hearing them. He adjusted his pants, he never had good fitting pants, and picked up speed. He heard a few footsteps behind him and before he could pick up his speed, he felt a rough hand catch his shirt collar from behind.

"When we asked you politely to stop, we expect you to stop. Get it?" said the burly man, the "lover boy" as he was pushed and pulled and forced to turn around to face him. "Man, you stink!" said the man before letting go of his collar and pushing him away. "They should have let you stay in prison! Weirdo!" the man continued. "Leave me alone!" mumbled the "weirdo" before turning around and walking away. He had to readjust his pants - which made the group laugh. He was not sure if she laughed too, but he didn't want to turn around lest he saw her laugh - that would break him down.

He didn't know how long he walked for, but he never looked back until he felt sure there was no one behind him. He kept to the riverside so he can find his way back to the circus quickly. He waited out on a bench still staring blankly at the river in front of him. He shook his head every often when he thought about the hurt he was feeling. He had never fit into their gang, even after years in the circus and the people in it. The only time he felt happy was when one day he assisted Mina in her trapeze rehearsal. It was a different town, a different place. As a reward for his help, she treated him to a day in the fairground. They were together the whole day. He even captured her picture in his 10 dollar throw away camera. He made sure he had the film developed next day - no matter how much it cost him.

Today, seeing her with them broke his heart more than anything. He missed his family, his mother especially, more now than any other time in his life.

Offline Harlome

Re: Masks (deilweg x Harlome)
« Reply #3 on: September 07, 2012, 10:08:26 PM »
Mina had a really rough time falling asleep that night, thinking about what she should do about the circus life versus the 'normal' life. It made her dizzy to ponder all of the possibilities, and to be honest she didn't know the first thing about a 'normal' life. She was a circus girl, through and through, literally born and raised under a tent, so when the idea to leave came to mind, she was frightened and had not a clue of where she could go or what she could do. A heavy sigh passed by her thin lips and she snuggled in to her pillow to try and relax enough to sleep.

The morning came far too soon in her opinion, as she heard a loud commotion getting closer and closer to her tent. She could hear people laughing and being silly, and all of a sudden she felt somebody crash on to the side of her bed, fully intent on waking her up.

"Heyyy Baby! Time to get up! We're going to go chase down that little freak of a clown! Hurry up before we lose him!" It was her 'lover boy', Turk. A big, stupid bull of a man that did absolutely nothing for her. But for some strange reason, he thought that she really was in love with him.

Mina jerked awake with a gasp as he jumped on to her bed, and grabbed her pillow to slam in his face angrily "Go away, Turk. I don't care." She groaned and tried to roll away from him, not really registering what he had said. But Turk didn't take 'no' for an answer very well so he pulled back her sheets, grinned at her petite figure that was barely covered and slapped her ass strong enough to get her to rise out of bed.

"Awwh come on, Mina! Get up and get that ass dressed, where's your sense of adventure?" Mina jerked out of bed with a cry and smacked Turk upside the head. "I don't know, Turkey, maybe it's off having an adventure." She glared at him through her mirror while she put on her favourite purple dress and walked past him to exit her tent.

As she left Turk behind she stopped in her tracks to see four other performers outside of her tent waiting for her. The sword swallower and his wife the fire-breathing hell bitch, Louis the not-so-amazing human cannon ball and his girlfriend who didn't actually have an act at all, Turk and Mina made six, it was like a triple date disaster. Mina rubbed her eyes with a yawn and asked unenthused "Are you all going too?" before any could answer Turk put his arm around the much smaller than him girl and nodded "Yessum they are!"

Mina rolled her eyes and folded her arms across her chest after stepping out from under Turk's "The only reason I'm going is to make sure you guys don't beat him up again..." She really felt bad for the sad clown...Jared? It wasn't fair the way he was treated and from the day that she had spent with him months ago, he seemed like a really sweet guy. Turk laughed and replaced his arm over her shoulders "You're just too sweet for your own good, Mina baby, but okay. What ever you say"

It didn't take them long to catch up to the lone figure, and she frowned as Turk was relentless in his harrassment "Turk, leave him alone..!" As the others laughed and walked away Mina stayed behind, saying she wanted to watch the river for a while but intead quietly shadowed Joey waiting until he stopped moving to approach him.

Mina stood a few feet away from the bench he sat on and softly spoke out, trying to convey as much sympathy and apology as she could in her simple "Hey,"

Offline deilwegTopic starter

Re: Masks (deilweg x Harlome)
« Reply #4 on: September 08, 2012, 09:46:04 AM »
Joey sat there for a while, alone and contemplating the unfairness of it all, when he heard her greet him in a soft voice. He turned around and saw her standing a few feet away from his bench.

He started at her for a few seconds before turning back to stare at the river. He had an incredible urge to be mean to her.

"Hi." he said simply. He looked around. "Where are your friends? Is it your turn to do the honors?" he asked her removing any sign of emotion from his face, but his voice stuttered with hurt and pain.

When hasn't he been fair to her? Why do this to him, with others? He thought she was different to others, I guess he was wrong - he wanted to say all that to her face, but he resisted.

Offline Harlome

Re: Masks (deilweg x Harlome)
« Reply #5 on: September 08, 2012, 12:33:37 PM »
Mina rarely ever wore shoes, and this time was no exception, so she was able to toe at the grass as she waited for any sort of reaction from Joey. She lowered her head with a frown as he assumed firstly that she was there to continue to bother him, and secondly that they were her friends.

"They aren't my friends, but they left. I made sure...can I sit with you?" She toyed with her fingers, like a child would while being scorned, and waited for his answer. "I don't expect you to say yes...but I just, wanted to talk.." Mina added, hoping that it might persuade him. She really did feel bad for the way her 'friends' always treated him, and wanted to do something about it finally.

Offline deilwegTopic starter

Re: Masks (deilweg x Harlome)
« Reply #6 on: September 08, 2012, 01:28:08 PM »
He turned around to her and looked at her in a quizzical way. "Please" he said almost not believing what she was saying. People have been mean to him and played horrible pranks on him even when he just wanted to stay away from every one of them. His childhood memories were replete with such instances. As a child he always questioned why. He never got a satisfactory answer - not in religion, not in churches, not in do-gooders, nor from the dozens of charities that approached him to make a selling case of out of him. He never trusted anyone, would she be any better?

"Please, do sit down." he said, still a bit wary and still on the lookout for the other members of the gang to jump on him with some other horrible prank.

Offline Harlome

Re: Masks (deilweg x Harlome)
« Reply #7 on: September 08, 2012, 03:41:06 PM »
She smiled a bit at him allowing her to sit, and moved to sit beside him with a decent gap between them. Mina kept her eyes on the scene before them as she continued. "I'm sorry," She started. "I just came to make sure that you'd be okay...I know Turk can be a total asshole." She watched him for a moment and gave a half smile, apology written on her face

Mina could see that Joey was still on edge and looking for another assault, so she tried to assure him "No one's coming for you...they all left after you did. It's okay."

Offline deilwegTopic starter

Re: Masks (deilweg x Harlome)
« Reply #8 on: September 08, 2012, 04:13:00 PM »
"Then why are you with him?" he asked her, feeling a slight tinge of jealousy building up in him. Although he had the issue of trust, he still liked her and dreamt of one day being able to be more than an acquaintance - more than a friend.

He remembered how he watched her during rehearsals on off-days. He would stay in a corner of the big stage, away from the lights and watched her beautiful body twist and turn to the soft music playing on the speakers. He would see Turk sipping on his beer bottle and wait under the trapeze where she was practicing. He would feel that prick in his heart when he see him so confidently stand under her. Did she like that?

"I have seen him hang around you all the time." he said with a bit of frustration "Even during your rehearsals" he mumbled. "I like you Mina." he looked into her eyes, hoping for her to see that he was genuine. "I really do. But, I am scared you won't. I have my past that never goes away and will probably not for a long time. I am scared of getting hurt, scared of hurting you too." He chuckled at how he opened up so easily to her. Her eyes made him forget his fears, hurt and pain. "I...I am sorry, I don't mean to scare you off talking to you like this" he apologized and went quiet

Offline Harlome

Re: Masks (deilweg x Harlome)
« Reply #9 on: September 09, 2012, 12:16:15 PM »
Mina pulled her hair behind her small ears and sighed a little "I not with him I just.." She let Joey continue, as it was apparent he had more to say and turned to look at him, her eyes widening some at his confession. She listened without saying a word, but couldn't help and smile a little with how open he was being for as little time as they were together.

Mina took a moment to recall their day at the fairgrounds together, and noted now that he did seem to show a little affection for her, but she had just figured it was because she made an attempt to be nice to him. Maybe it was still that way? She couldn't be sure unless she asked but she didn't have the heart. "I..didn't know that's how you felt." Mina sort of scrunched up a handful of her dress in her hands as she did when she didn't know what else to do, and sighed a little, unsure of what to say next other than reassure him "No, it's okay. If, that's really how you feel then that's how you feel. I don't imagine you have too many people you can talk to so it's good to get things off your chest when you can."

She sort of winced, realizing that she had accidentally taken what might be considered a stab at him, saying no one really talks to him so she put a hand on his lap and apolgized "I-I'm sorry. I just mean that...uhm.." Mina didn't really know how she could put it in a way that would be any nicer so she just shook her head and thought for a moment, offering to be open with him as he had with her. "Do you ever just...want to get away from here? Like, leave Gemini, I mean. For good. Just leave and never come back?" Mina looked Joey in the eye to show she was serious even though she laughed a little "Have you ever wanted to run away from the circus and join the normal life?" Even after sleeping on it she still thought it was funny to do the opposite of every childhood dream, but still serious enough to consider it.

Offline deilwegTopic starter

Re: Masks (deilweg x Harlome)
« Reply #10 on: September 09, 2012, 05:37:34 PM »
"You are right. I don't have a lot of people to talk to." he replied, feeling a bit hurt at the suggestion in that statement. However, her apology felt heartfelt and he took it without question.

He looked at her quizzically at her question. He took a few moments to study her. Being so close to her made his head swim a bit. "If there is a better life outside , then yes. But I can't see a better life for me outside."

He had a million questions and doubts sprouting in his head. He wanted to ask her why, but he was not sure he was allowed to. He wanted to know why did she ask him first. She is probably the highest earning performer in the circus, and him probably the lowest earning. Why would his opinion on this ever matter to her? Most importantly, why is she so interested in a person like him.

"Why would you want to leave?" he asked her, genuinely curious.

Offline Harlome

Re: Masks (deilweg x Harlome)
« Reply #11 on: September 09, 2012, 07:11:13 PM »
Mina frowned a bit, able to see it in his face and hear it in his voice that what she had said hurt his feelings but she couldn't do anything but apologize, which she had already done. While she waited for his answer, she kept her gaze on the scene before them and watched the trees sway in the soft breeze. At his answer she sort of looked at him wondering, why exactly he thought he couldn't have a better life outside the circus when she recalled Turk mentioning something about Joey going back to prision. Rather than bringing it up she let it go, and put her thumb to her mouth and began to chew on the nail, another one of her nervous habits.

"Why?" She repeated, thinking about it with a sigh. "Honestly? I don't know...I guess I want to try something new. I'm tired of the same act day in and day out. I want to know what falling in love is really like, instead of acting. Y'know?"

Offline deilwegTopic starter

Re: Masks (deilweg x Harlome)
« Reply #12 on: September 10, 2012, 04:49:01 PM »
Joey looked at her with even more surprise. Her idea of love waiting for her outside the circus made him think she is naive, although her innocence felt very endearing to him.

"I am sure a beautiful and good girl like you will find your love. I have issues which I don't think anyone in this world can help me with." he said as he stared at the gently flowing river. "You'd rather getting going, or your friends might come back for you. If they see me, they will hurt me too, especially if they see you with me."

He avoided looking at her. She is most probably the only love of his life, but his life is too messed up to involve her in it as well. She probably will be better off without him - he thought, almost choking on the last sentence. He realised that when she leaves him on the bench today, that probably is the last time he would talk to her in his life. He looked at her one last time before she would leave him today. He attempted to drink in every last bit of her beautiful face before she turns away from him.

Offline Harlome

Re: Masks (deilweg x Harlome)
« Reply #13 on: September 11, 2012, 11:32:06 AM »
Mina gave a soft smile at Joey's compliment and gave a wave of her hand, saying "Nah, it'll be fine. You're not the only one who can slip away from the circus for a little while, you know."

She looked over to him and found herself getting a bit confused, for the time that she had spent with him was so little, she felt that she was able to connect with him in a way she couldn't with anyone else from Gemini. She could be open with him and not have to worry about seeming to be anybody but herself or being judged for being 'too nice' or things like that. It was nice, and it made her feel a little better, and thought that maybe she wouldn't have to leave, so long as she could continue to talk to him.

After a minute of thinking, Mina sat up a little bit and looked over to him, taking in the features of his face as she replied to his earlier statement "The past is the past, it never goes away, for any of us...and we all have our issues too. So, don't think that you're alone in that." She smiled. "Everybody has somebody out there, at least that's what I think."

Offline deilwegTopic starter

Re: Masks (deilweg x Harlome)
« Reply #14 on: September 13, 2012, 04:51:25 PM »
Joey looked at her with a sense of helplessness in his face. He wish he didn't have to insist, but her naivete needed to be correct - or so he thought. "I wouldn't mind, but your friends are a cruel bunch. They will find you with me and they will taunt me, humiliate me and insult me. They probably will do nothing to you."

Joey looked at her to hopefully make her understand why he can't defend himself. He was on parol and he gets into trouble, he will be forced to go to prison for a long time - and that is one place he didn't want to go. Her friends possibly will never even sniff the inside of a prison. Since he was found guilty of murder, he will be prime suspect - no matter what.

"You don't understand! I will be in big trouble if I am found fighting with your friends!" he said, pleadingly. "Please leave me alone." he whispered, almost hoping she wouldn't listen and she wouldn't leave.

For the first time he wished for some luck, and he was sure he was not gonna get any from the universe.

Offline Harlome

Re: Masks (deilweg x Harlome)
« Reply #15 on: September 14, 2012, 12:27:34 AM »
Her brows pinched together to see his expression so afraid, and nodded some at his concern but shrugged as she seemed unable to care about what the others would think noting "Don't you think they'll bug me too? I'm sure they'd wonder why I'm with you, but I don't care...and neither should you."

Mina put a hand on Joey's leg to try and lend him some of her calm mentality, "Then don't fight them." She said simply, letting it sink in before she continued "I'm not saying let them beat you down, or anything but just don't do anything. They'll get in trouble for starting it, especially if you didn't do anything to provoke it or even defend yourself -which you have a right to do...and if the Ring Master does nothing, then we'll take it to the police."

She understood a little, that his past was a troubling one by the way he clung to it, afraid to do anything incase his past come back to haunt him but what she couldn't understand was what exactly had happened, unless Joey told her, and she certainly wasn't about to ask. Mina decided to give him a little piece of her own history, her eyes turned back to the nature before them, her gaze going far beyond it back to when she was younger. "Back before you joined Gemini, before Turk came along and a few of the others...I uhm. I got the Ring Master at the time removed from his position....because of me, we almost lost everything. Gemini was in jeopardy of being gone for good," Mina didn't look to him as she was still stuck in her past, "Because of me, you almost wouldn't have had the chance to come here."

Offline deilwegTopic starter

Re: Masks (deilweg x Harlome)
« Reply #16 on: September 24, 2012, 08:06:55 AM »
Joey found her candid admission surprising as he tried to gauge and judge her frankly. She was truthful, and she seems kind unlike her other friends - which encouraged him to relax a bit. His terrible past still didn't let him trust her completely yet.

Her genuinity in helping him resolve his issues moved him a bit. "Yes, I wish I was as level headed as you are when it comes to these things." he said "I believe you now know I was in prison for.." he paused "...something very bad I did." he looked into her eyes to see if she would judge him harshly. "I murdered my uncle " he waited to see her reaction for a moment and looked away at the river. "Many people don't understand why I did it. I wouldn't blame you if you were to walk away now."