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Author Topic: Actual singles ad, W for M off Craigslist.... your thoughts?  (Read 896 times)

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Offline ScottTopic starter

Actual singles ad, W for M off Craigslist.... your thoughts?
« on: August 25, 2012, 11:56:17 AM »
"I have recently been completely betrayed by my husband. I want to talk to sensitive men that will let me talk and will listen and help me understand what happend to my happily married relationship. I need a shoulder, and if all you want to do is try to hook up for sex and to do the same thing with me that my husband did to me, NO THANKS DONT EVEN REPLY! I am a really nice lady that is going through a really hard time and I need someone to talk to. I loved my husband very much and still do, but we are done I can never forgive him for lying and cheating on me as bad and as long as he did."



In my humble opinion she really wants a girlfriend or a dog... What kind of man wants to listen to her B.S. and emotional baggage and still not get any? (and she's a bad speller too.)

Offline WildCat

Re: Actual singles ad, W for M off Craigslist.... your thoughts?
« Reply #1 on: August 25, 2012, 12:17:41 PM »
I refuse to believe that I'm living in a world without men who will unselfishly provide support and friendship without expecting things in return.

I don't think that advertizing on Craigslist, however, is an effective method for locating them.

Offline Beguile's Mistress

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Re: Actual singles ad, W for M off Craigslist.... your thoughts?
« Reply #2 on: August 25, 2012, 12:28:35 PM »
We've become a world of sceptics and cynics because we've been mislead and betrayed all too often by ads like that.  Do I want to believe there are people who advertise like that and just want to talk.  Yes.  And do I believe there are people who could respond and give a shoulder to cry on and lend and ear to listen without trying to take advantage of someone hurt and vulnerable?  Yes.

Don't answer ads like that but if you do make sure you don't get involved to the point where you can't walk away, unfriend the person or delete them from your contacts.  Don't let yourself be drawn in to something that may be deeper than you want to handle.

Offline Envious

Re: Actual singles ad, W for M off Craigslist.... your thoughts?
« Reply #3 on: August 25, 2012, 03:08:55 PM »
Sounds like a trap to me. She needs a counsellor, not a line-up of random men to spill her guts out to.

Offline DarkSideofThinking

Re: Actual singles ad, W for M off Craigslist.... your thoughts?
« Reply #4 on: August 25, 2012, 03:38:05 PM »
mhhh there's nothing wrong in looking for a male friend...but I can understand Scott's reation even if it sounds a bit too harsch...If you place a singles ad on a dating site then you do it to look for a relationship and not for a friendship...at least in my opinion. So it would be better to search for such a person amidst the people she knows or so...could be a trap but doesn't have to be one. But I don#t think you can find friends with this method. And if she searches for just a friend? Why can't this person be female btw?

Offline ScottTopic starter

Re: Actual singles ad, W for M off Craigslist.... your thoughts?
« Reply #5 on: August 25, 2012, 05:50:58 PM »
Yep, there's nothing I want to do more than to meet up with a woman, pay for dinner and probably drinks, and talk about her ex and present ideas to her why he wanted to cheat on her.

Offline tozhma

Re: Actual singles ad, W for M off Craigslist.... your thoughts?
« Reply #6 on: August 30, 2012, 02:52:49 PM »
Naively, I would say she's looking for help in all the wrong places. I wonder if she has a good support network irl, because the craigslist thing seems pretty anomalous.

Offline Oniya

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Re: Actual singles ad, W for M off Craigslist.... your thoughts?
« Reply #7 on: August 30, 2012, 03:36:13 PM »
I'd say that the reason she's specifying a man is because she's unable to get the male perspective from her female friends, or is at least under the impression that another woman wouldn't be able to provide the 'head space' to explain why her husband cheated on her.

Maybe I'm being charitable, but I can see her rationale in seeking a man to talk to, and at least she's up front with saying she's not looking for a 'hook-up'.  Hopefully, that will eliminate 90% of the 'booty call' responses.

Offline Silverfyre

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Re: Actual singles ad, W for M off Craigslist.... your thoughts?
« Reply #8 on: August 30, 2012, 03:56:48 PM »
I'd say that the reason she's specifying a man is because she's unable to get the male perspective from her female friends, or is at least under the impression that another woman wouldn't be able to provide the 'head space' to explain why her husband cheated on her.

Maybe I'm being charitable, but I can see her rationale in seeking a man to talk to, and at least she's up front with saying she's not looking for a 'hook-up'.  Hopefully, that will eliminate 90% of the 'booty call' responses.

Pretty much my opinion on it.  Not every guy is out there looking to score on the rebound.  Some of us do just listen and help out when needed. 

And yeah, taking a woman out who really needs to just talk and have someone listen to her is not a waste of money.  Oh no, you were nice and bought her dinner and drinks and didn't have sex with her?! The horror.

Offline Harlome

Re: Actual singles ad, W for M off Craigslist.... your thoughts?
« Reply #9 on: September 03, 2012, 10:57:52 AM »
It's a pretty big shout out for help, but yeah in my opinion it's probably been done in the wrong place, because although she may find somebody who could help, I'm sure there are a whole whack of trolls just eating it up and making her feel worse. I agree that sometimes it's important to get the male perspective from an actual male rather than having a woman speculate, but I just can't help but to think there's better places to put an ad like that

Offline tozhma

Re: Actual singles ad, W for M off Craigslist.... your thoughts?
« Reply #10 on: September 04, 2012, 01:08:55 AM »
Pretty much my opinion on it.  Not every guy is out there looking to score on the rebound.  Some of us do just listen and help out when needed. 

And yeah, taking a woman out who really needs to just talk and have someone listen to her is not a waste of money.  Oh no, you were nice and bought her dinner and drinks and didn't have sex with her?! The horror.

You jest, but the Men's Rights crowd spends a crazy amount of time saying just that. *shakes head*

Offline CmdrRenegade

Re: Actual singles ad, W for M off Craigslist.... your thoughts?
« Reply #11 on: September 04, 2012, 11:29:12 PM »
You jest, but the Men's Rights crowd spends a crazy amount of time saying just that. *shakes head*

Just as there are plenty of men who will go on dating sites just to try to get a quick lay, there will be women who use them to just get a free dinner and drinks with men they really have no intention of pursuing even before they meet them in person.  Using people is not exclusive to either gender.

Offline tozhma

Re: Actual singles ad, W for M off Craigslist.... your thoughts?
« Reply #12 on: September 05, 2012, 02:44:12 PM »
I don't dispute that fact. Though I feel there are more pressing matters than these.

Offline Silverfyre

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Re: Actual singles ad, W for M off Craigslist.... your thoughts?
« Reply #13 on: September 05, 2012, 03:39:57 PM »
So, people are not allowed to comment on anything but "pressing matters"?  I'm a little confused by your statements here.

Offline MasterMischief

Re: Actual singles ad, W for M off Craigslist.... your thoughts?
« Reply #14 on: September 08, 2012, 10:21:41 AM »
This woman is lost and feels so very alone.  What makes it worse is I do not think she is ready for the truth.  Her language suggests this happened to her and that she was not an accomplice to what happened.  Please do not understand me.  I am not trying to blame the victim here.  There were two people in the relationship.  They both have a hand in what happened.  I am not absolving the husband.  Whatever happened that made him feel this was acceptable should have been brought out in the open and discussed instead of going behind his wife and betraying her trust.

The fact that she is posting this on CL is only more evidence to me that her judgment is questionable.  Is there something wrong with asking for help?  Absolutely not!  She needs it.  Looking for it on a notorious meet market?  Red flag.  There is a lot more to this unfortunate story.