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Author Topic: Things you don't want to hear on the first date  (Read 10542 times)

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Offline PigPin

Re: Things you don't want to hear on the first date
« Reply #100 on: May 07, 2012, 12:55:28 PM »
Free? I thought you were paying.  All my assets are frozen in the freezer.

Offline Breathless Intent

Re: Things you don't want to hear on the first date
« Reply #101 on: May 07, 2012, 12:58:36 PM »
Where's my present?

Offline Malthas

Re: Things you don't want to hear on the first date
« Reply #102 on: May 07, 2012, 01:51:14 PM »
Let's make sure to be done in an hour okay, my next date wants to see the movie at nine.

Offline PigPin

Re: Things you don't want to hear on the first date
« Reply #103 on: May 07, 2012, 02:01:09 PM »
You look to have childbearing hips....Good. I'm thinking at least a dozen....Shall we.

Offline Somnifera

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Re: Things you don't want to hear on the first date
« Reply #104 on: May 07, 2012, 03:33:15 PM »
I love you.

Offline RainbowLei

Re: Things you don't want to hear on the first date
« Reply #105 on: May 07, 2012, 03:47:15 PM »
That friend that hooked us up said you were into... I was thinking after dessert, my place, you brought your things right?

Offline PigPin

Re: Things you don't want to hear on the first date
« Reply #106 on: May 07, 2012, 03:48:47 PM »
So I was thinking we'd just cut the crap and let you meet my parents.

Offline ThatRPGuy

Re: Things you don't want to hear on the first date
« Reply #107 on: May 08, 2012, 02:24:03 AM »
Another true one, and the last time I used eHarmony;

Do you mind if we meet somewhere closer to me? There's an iHop near my house. My dad just doesn't want to drive that far.

Offline Mordred

Re: Things you don't want to hear on the first date
« Reply #108 on: May 08, 2012, 11:52:21 PM »
Hey! You're my first date after doing 15 big ones for murder. So.. umm.. you gonna eat your dessert?
« Last Edit: May 09, 2012, 12:31:10 AM by Mordred »

Offline SummerWhispers

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Re: Things you don't want to hear on the first date
« Reply #109 on: May 09, 2012, 08:45:04 AM »
I hope you don't mind, I told my wife we would stop by her birthday party for a couple of hours.

Offline RainbowLei

Re: Things you don't want to hear on the first date
« Reply #110 on: May 09, 2012, 11:04:57 AM »
I love that cute little zebra stripped pillow on your bed, you know the one you keep your secret toys in, and the way your hair drapes around your body when you sleep, so much like the last girl.

Offline BrokenShards

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Re: Things you don't want to hear on the first date
« Reply #111 on: May 09, 2012, 01:50:16 PM »
I don't think I cooked that chicken properly...

Offline Xandi

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Re: Things you don't want to hear on the first date
« Reply #112 on: May 09, 2012, 03:09:02 PM »
I have to be back to the half way house by 10pm or the police will track my ankle bracelet and pick me up and believe me that can be embarrassing.

Offline Tidus

Re: Things you don't want to hear on the first date
« Reply #113 on: May 09, 2012, 03:41:03 PM »
You don't need to worry about protection. I'm already pregnant!

Offline DeMalachine

Re: Things you don't want to hear on the first date
« Reply #114 on: May 09, 2012, 03:53:48 PM »
You're so wonderful! Even my sperms are eager to meet you!

Offline Mr Bigglesworth

Re: Things you don't want to hear on the first date
« Reply #115 on: May 09, 2012, 03:57:50 PM »
You're wearing that?  Does your mom dress you too?

Offline MiaFire

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Re: Things you don't want to hear on the first date
« Reply #116 on: May 09, 2012, 04:00:49 PM »
If we work out, I don't want to meet your family, because it would just be too awkward with having dated your two brothers as well, before.

Offline Breathless Intent

Re: Things you don't want to hear on the first date
« Reply #117 on: May 09, 2012, 04:04:31 PM »
Ugh...I think I have gas.

Offline shooter6806

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Re: Things you don't want to hear on the first date
« Reply #118 on: May 09, 2012, 05:54:13 PM »
Can I borrow your phone?  I need to call my parole officer.

Offline Tsumi Okazaki

Re: Things you don't want to hear on the first date
« Reply #119 on: May 12, 2012, 10:46:32 AM »
My husband won't mind at all, dear.

Offline TheLegionary

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Re: Things you don't want to hear on the first date
« Reply #120 on: May 12, 2012, 10:48:50 AM »
セクスは いかがですか。 
まだです。

Offline Xandi

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Re: Things you don't want to hear on the first date
« Reply #121 on: May 12, 2012, 10:50:59 AM »
I want to hear what TL said in that last post for sure.

Offline Adammair

Re: Things you don't want to hear on the first date
« Reply #122 on: May 12, 2012, 11:29:35 AM »
I want to hear what TL said in that last post for sure.

+1

Offline Tsumi Okazaki

Re: Things you don't want to hear on the first date
« Reply #123 on: May 12, 2012, 12:46:57 PM »
Will you be my alibi?

Offline TheLegionary

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Re: Things you don't want to hear on the first date
« Reply #124 on: May 12, 2012, 12:49:36 PM »
If I scream too much, it is because of my back pain. Dont worry!