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Holiday Issue 2016

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Author Topic: Corrupt a wish  (Read 121492 times)

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Offline Stone

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Re: Corrupt a wish
« Reply #5250 on: July 13, 2016, 01:10:34 PM »
Granted. He comes out with a book that everybody wishes he had burned instead. Don't rush a writer, brother. O8)

I wish the men and women inhabiting these lands stuck to their word more often than they do.

Offline Jclaymore

Re: Corrupt a wish
« Reply #5251 on: July 13, 2016, 05:33:17 PM »
Granted. But people from the other lands become so unreliable that they don't keep their word by default. They are also immigrating to your lands now.

I wish I could manipulate space and time.

Offline Darkness Reigns

Re: Corrupt a wish
« Reply #5252 on: July 13, 2016, 05:50:37 PM »
Granted. You manipulate the stars at just the right time, and now you're the one solely responsible for awakening C'thulu.

I wish that I could forget my regrets.

Offline whimsy

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Re: Corrupt a wish
« Reply #5253 on: July 13, 2016, 05:56:45 PM »
granted, but now that you don't remember any regrets, you're doomed to repeat them

i wish i had as much fun doing things on my own as i do when i'm with other people

Offline Jclaymore

Re: Corrupt a wish
« Reply #5254 on: July 13, 2016, 06:07:06 PM »
Granted, you no longer enjoy doing things with other people, thus by having little fun in either case, your wish is granted.

I wish humans did not require sleep.

Offline Darkness Reigns

Re: Corrupt a wish
« Reply #5255 on: July 13, 2016, 06:46:02 PM »
Granted. People still get tired, however, and thus many accidents happen, and chaos ensues.

I wish it would never go above 90 degrees outside.

Offline whimsy

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Re: Corrupt a wish
« Reply #5256 on: July 14, 2016, 01:22:24 PM »
granted, but now a whole whack of creatures and plants have died out because apparently they need 90+ weather to survive WAY TO GO

i wish i didn't break my tailbone jumping off that bridge in 2009

Offline Razil

Re: Corrupt a wish
« Reply #5257 on: July 17, 2016, 09:27:39 PM »
Granted. Tailbone removed in 2008 to spare breakage. Now your ass sags.  :P

I wish I could vacation on the moon.

Offline Jclaymore

Re: Corrupt a wish
« Reply #5258 on: July 18, 2016, 07:30:54 AM »
granted, however there's no way back and oxygen is running out.

I wish that i did not wish that i wished that i wish this.

Offline Razil

Re: Corrupt a wish
« Reply #5259 on: July 21, 2016, 09:23:40 PM »
granted, however there's no way back and oxygen is running out.

I wish that i did not wish that i wished that i wish this.
Granted though, amid all the confusion revolving around the actual wish request, several wish-granting staff went on strike thus the entire department is now backlogged. Take a bow!

I wish I could sleep in tomorrow.

Offline This One

Re: Corrupt a wish
« Reply #5260 on: July 21, 2016, 09:50:11 PM »
Congratulations. You now sleep in the tomorrow, but never in the today. Enjoy your life of always putting off sleep until tomorrow.

I wish I was a little bit taller

Offline Irisa

Re: Corrupt a wish
« Reply #5261 on: July 22, 2016, 07:33:55 PM »
Granted.  You are now a bit taller, but all your pants are too short now and people just assume you gained weight.

I wish someone would foot my college tuition for me. 

Online FourStellar

Re: Corrupt a wish
« Reply #5262 on: July 25, 2016, 09:03:55 AM »
Granted. But, ahem, you forgot all about room and board, so you need to drop out.

I wish for mild weather.

Offline Beguile's Mistress

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Re: Corrupt a wish
« Reply #5263 on: July 25, 2016, 09:36:48 AM »
Granted - However, the milder weather is always some place where you aren't and goes away when you get there. (sorry)

I wish I had more time.

Online FourStellar

Re: Corrupt a wish
« Reply #5264 on: July 25, 2016, 09:45:41 AM »
Granted. You find yourself arrested for a crime you didn't commit. It's late on Friday and bail won't be set until Monday in court. Have a nice weekend!

I wish I had the kind of job that allowed sabbaticals.

Offline Dark Despairs

Re: Corrupt a wish
« Reply #5265 on: July 27, 2016, 07:42:48 PM »
Granted, you only get one sabbatical every ten years. I wish some people showed me a little more respect and were honest with me, instead of leading me on.

Offline Irisa

Re: Corrupt a wish
« Reply #5266 on: July 27, 2016, 10:34:32 PM »
Granted, but it's going to be pretty expensive, so you will only be able to afford that respect and honesty about once a month.

I wish I had a huge bathtub to soak in.

Offline Hannelore Stormbane

Re: Corrupt a wish
« Reply #5267 on: July 29, 2016, 08:05:09 AM »
Granted, you have a huge bathtub. But unfortunately the water's not working.  :-(

Wish I had some good news about my exams.

Offline Dark Despairs

Re: Corrupt a wish
« Reply #5268 on: July 29, 2016, 11:38:37 AM »
Granted. The good news about your exams is that you know what it is going to be about. The bad news, you only have sixty minutes to answer a hundred and thirty-six questions. I wish I they would allow me to build explosives.

Offline Mnemosyne

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Re: Corrupt a wish
« Reply #5269 on: August 01, 2016, 12:25:33 PM »
Oh most certainly granted. You are permitted to build explosives. You are never taught how to do as much though and are only given children's toys in order to make them. For example you get play dough. Please do enjoy yourself. I will love to see your colorful work. I wish that I was not a turtle.

Offline Stone

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Re: Corrupt a wish
« Reply #5270 on: August 01, 2016, 12:56:46 PM »
Granted. You are now a tortoise.

I wish turtles and tortoises were the same type of rabbit.

Offline dolt

Re: Corrupt a wish
« Reply #5271 on: August 04, 2016, 04:45:01 AM »
Granted, but they're man eating types of rabbits.

I wish I had a tail.

Offline Stone

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Re: Corrupt a wish
« Reply #5272 on: August 04, 2016, 09:22:29 AM »
Granted. Your tail is Chris Hemsworth circa Thor 2. Good luck getting any work done. O8)

Offline Mnemosyne

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Re: Corrupt a wish
« Reply #5273 on: August 10, 2016, 08:40:45 PM »
I am going to imagine your wish was for an afro since you did not write one. So, granted. You get an afro. It changes colors according to the feelings of those speaking to you. So it could be a freaky deaky mix of colors if multiple people were talking to you. Fun.

I wish that it would rain just enough to flood the streets but not enough to do anyone any damage.

Offline Mimétisme

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Re: Corrupt a wish
« Reply #5274 on: August 10, 2016, 10:03:28 PM »

I wish that it would rain just enough to flood the streets but not enough to do anyone any damage.

Granted! And not a single person took damage! However, that much rain you get to enjoy you basement being over run with sewer roaches.


I wish to gain a new addiction that costs nothing but I get my fill daily.