Would you like me if I.....

[AmberStarfire]

Not particularly.

Would you like me if I did that to you?

[Captain Maltese]

My dream world is a pretty messed up place. You might end up being caught in there, and find yourself subjected to my subconscious. Do you think you would be the same one after you eventually managed to get out?

Would you like me if I wrote a poem for you?

[Despairs]

Sure, but please, nothing lovey dovey. Would you like me if snatched the last bottle of your favorite wine and downed the entire bottle in one go?

[Captain Maltese]

Now that would be alcohol abuse on several levels. I would be impressed if you emptied the bottle in one swig though; you must have a tummy like a copper tank.

Would you like me if I gave you a basic course in wine appreciation?

[Despairs]

Yes. Would you like me if I meditated from time to time, chanting in a language you didn't understand?

[Captain Maltese]

I would be highly interested, and offer to join in with my shaman drum... provided you would tell me what you was chanting for in the first place, of course.

Would you like me if our shared chants had a tangible effect along the line of their intents?

[Despairs]

Yes. Would you like me if I proposed we cut off one or two of our four limbs in order to avoid being tortured and killed by the enemy, as a result of being captured and chained together?

[Captain Maltese]

I would not hate you for it. But if we had tools for dismemberment at hand I'd rather have a go at the chains. It's not like you have much of a survival capacity with a freshly hacked off limb anyway.

Would you like me if I suggested carrying you to safety?

[Despairs]

Yes, if me not being able to function correctly didn't result in you getting hurt or dying. If you did get hurt because of me, but your injury wasn't too serious, I would engage the enemy, taking down as many insects as I can, even if it meant dying, thus buying you time to escape. Allowing a comrade to die is something I will do everything in my power to prevent, even if it means sacrificing myself. Would you like me if I asked you to build a robot with me?

[Captain Maltese]

....insects? Come now. The enemy you don't respect WILL kill you.

Build a robot? Sure, sounds fun. But if you install anything from Apple or Microsoft on it I'm out.

Would you like me if I show you around in my bunker?

[Despairs]

Respect is earned not taken. The enemy doesn't respect you, why should you respect them? Yes, build a robot. I had no plans to install anything from Apple or Microsoft on it. I'd rather come up with my own software.  Why the hate against Apple and Microsoft? Show me around in your bunker? Uh..sure. Would you like me  if I asked you to race me, in a footrace or car race?

[QueenMaleficent]

Only if you didn't mind losing to either...

Would you like me if I took you on a romantic picnic under the stars?

[Despairs]

Sure, no singing please. Would you like me if I made out with you under the star and moonlight?

[QueenMaleficent]

I can't promise that I wouldn't be channeling a few of the Disney Princesses. I would, very much indeed.

Would you like me if I invited you over to my place for dinner?

[Despairs]

Depends on what we are having and who else is going to be there. Would you like me if I whispered sweet things in your ears?

[QueenMaleficent]

We'd be alone, of course,  and you can't go wrong with steak and wine, right? I would like that very much.

Would you like me if I leaned in a little closer?

[Despairs]

Yes. In some cases you can't go wrong with steak and wine. I am more of a fish vegetables and chicken person. Would you like me if I invited you to shower with me?

[cinza]

Lower water bill and saving water for the fishies? Yes. I would like you. 

Would you like me if I took hour long showers?

[Despairs]

Wait, nobody said anything about being stuck in there with you for an hour? What am I supposed to do, stare at you for an hour until you're done and leave after you? Would you like me if I cooked for you everyday? You can do everything else, but the cooking.

[cinza]

As long as olives aren't involved, please cook for me! I don't mind doing everything else.

Would you like me if we didn't speak the same language?

[Despairs]

Yes. I would also like you, regardless of the gender you identify as, etc. I would try and do everything I can to learn your language, though. Would you like me if I asked you not to sleep with me? (Sleeping in the same bed, nothing to do with sex.)

[cinza]

Considering how I tend to burrito-roll up in blankets, it would probably be best if we didn't share a bed.

Would you like me if I was super peppy and active early in the morning? Going for runs, MAYBE 'accidentally' jumping on your bed?

[Despairs]

Just make sure there isn't a pillow next to me when you start jumping on my bed, I will use it to knock you down. Would you like me if I didn't kiss you good-bye before leaving?

[cinza]

As long as there is some acknowledgement that you will miss me, kisses aren't necessary.

Would you like me if I flirted relentlessly with you, but never made the first physical move?

[Despairs]

No. I would avoid you at all cost. Flirting a little is fine and all, but to do it all the bloody time. Just, no. Would you like me if sent you drawings of what I wanted us to do together?