Once upon a time, far away in a deep forest there lived two trees. These two were the best of friends, as they were rooted next to each other; one was a beach tree, and one was a birch tree. They conversed on all sorts of issues; the weather, the habits of the animals around them, gossip about the other trees, but more than anything they loved to debate. Not to say that they're relationship was argumentative, simply that they were both very opinionated trees and they saw no point in keeping their opinions to themselves.
One day they were in the throws of another lively bit of banter, when the beach looked down suddenly and noticed that a tiny sapling had sprouted up between them. The beach stopped suddenly, to the surprise of its birch friend.
"What is it?" asked the birch.
The beach chuckled slightly to itself, in apparent awe.
"Why it looks as if we have got ourselves a little one. By the leaves on my very branches, a son of a beach."
The birch tree looked down to observe and congratulate its friend, but quickly came to quite a different conclusion.
"My friend, I understand that in your excitement you may have only just made a glancing observation, but the tiny sapling that sits before us is most obviously a son of a birch."
The beach tree snapped a look back at the birch.
"A son of a birch! You are being foolish, old friend. Look at the branch patterns, developmental or no, that is unmistakably a son of a beach."
On they argued, for hours and hours, back and forth in more a furious manner than was custom for them. Finally, after both had nearly exhausted themselves with debate, a woodpecker landed lightly on one of the branches of the sapling. The birch noticed the small bird, and declared definitely to its friend.
"See there, a woodpecker! He is a master of all things wood, and will be able to tell us beyond all doubt that this sapling is most definitely a son of a birch. Say now, woodpecker!"
The small woodpecker looked up, startled for a moment by the tree.
"Yes, great tree birch tree?"
"I wonder" the birch continued, "if you could tell us what sort of tree it is you are landed so gingerly upon?"
The bird laughed. "Of course, I would not be much of a woodpecker if I could not."
The small bird set to work, pecking gingerly at the small tree, and after a few minutes, hopped back up to its original post.
"I have concluded the decent of this very tree." He said, with a hint of pride.
"Well tell us!" The beach tree chimed in hurriedly, "Is it a son of a beach, or a son of a birch?"
The woodpecker frowned slightly.
"Neither, actually, but it is the best piece of ash I ever stuck my pecker in!"