Author Topic: Rapture or Party Time (Read 26248 times)

Avis habilis · « **Reply #25 on:** May 20, 2011, 07:45:18 AM »

Quote from: HairyHeretic on May 19, 2011, 08:16:00 AM

I believe the rapture has been expected since shortly after Jesus's death.

As it happens it's a doctrine invented in the US (or rather the Massachusetts Bay Colony, at the time) by Increase & Cotton Mather. So those who believe in it have only been expecting it since about the beginning of the 18th century.

RubySlippers · « **Reply #26 on:** May 20, 2011, 07:50:28 AM »

I ,as an ordained cleric in the Universal Life Church, confer upon all members of this site a perpetual indulge for all sins from now until the end of eternity, and therefore free of taint before Gods eyes in the name of Jesus.

In case that is not want you want I do the same thing for the realm of Lucifer assuring a nice spot in Hell maybe with air conditioning and a nice red light district around you with top entertainments in Lucifers name.

There all taken care of.

For me my companion and I are going to be getting together for one hell of a lay just in case might as well go out with a smile and exhausted sweaty body in the arms of my lover.

HairyHeretic · « **Reply #27 on:** May 20, 2011, 07:51:54 AM »

I may have gotten mixed up. I may have been think of the return of Jesus instead.

They can have their rapture, Valhalla will be a lot more fun :)

Lilias · « **Reply #28 on:** May 20, 2011, 07:52:08 AM »

What Avis said. Ask an Easterner like me about it, and you'll get a headscratch at best.

Time to cue in the theme song yet?

Blondie - Rapture

Avis habilis · « **Reply #29 on:** May 20, 2011, 07:57:11 AM »

Quote from: Lilias on May 20, 2011, 07:52:08 AM

Ask an Easterner like me about it, and you'll get a headscratch at best.

Hell, ask an Episcopalian about it & you'll get a heavy sigh. Outside the States, it's - well, let's call it a rare doctrine even among Protestant sects.

naughtypoet · « **Reply #30 on:** May 20, 2011, 08:00:41 AM »

Oh the Rapture!!
Such a mindfuck. Our true purpose here is not to live in fear if any God. Yet, to break all the binding man made fears we have been led through generations to control us. We each have higher purposes. Our world is about to change, yet not in the biblical way. Our consciousness is going to become awoken and we are all going to move forward. I have seen many dates come to pass of this ' rapture". Saturday will also bring us into Sunday, and on Monday, we will all wake up and go to work. Fear, is a great weapon.

Lilias · « **Reply #31 on:** May 20, 2011, 08:02:16 AM »

Quote from: Avis habilis on May 20, 2011, 07:57:11 AM

Hell, ask an Episcopalian about it & you'll get a heavy sigh. Outside the States, it's - well, let's call it a rare doctrine even among Protestant sects.

At least those familiar with it can look on it with some indulgence for the village idiot. Further east you'd get blank stares (pre-explanation) and a twirling finger at temple level (post-explanation). Ils sont fous, ces Romains!

gaggedLouise · « **Reply #32 on:** May 20, 2011, 10:10:31 AM »

I didn't realize the coming tribulations were going to travel around the world time zone by time zone - why would the Lord God start precisely in NZ, by the way? The fact of the dateline running in the mid-Pacific is a purely human convention.

As always, there are business opportunities to be made:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-13468131

Quote

An atheist and entrepreneur from North Hampshire, Bart Centre, is enjoying a boost in business for Eternal Earth-bound Pets, which he set up to look after the pets of those who believe they will be raptured.

He has more than 250 clients who are paying up to $135 (£83) to have their pets picked up and cared for after the rapture.

They would be disappointed twice, he told the Wall Street Journal. "Once because they weren't raptured and again because I don't do refunds."

Me and mine are going to see Wagner's The Valkyrie by video link to a movie theatre on Sunday, so I would be mightily miffed if the Met, and the internet, has been knocked for six by then. Plus, we would all be punished for disgracing Sunday by watching an opera involving heathen gods and heroes.

despickable · « **Reply #33 on:** May 20, 2011, 10:25:19 AM »

For the end of the world party i have listed a few songs that can be played

Rapture by Blondie
The End of The World As We Know It by REM
Lake of Fire by Nirvana
Raise Me Up by Westlife
Deadman's Party by Oingo Boingo
Waiting For The End of The World by Elvis Costello

I have my deck chair on the balcony and a few mates and pizza and so on ready to watch the fireworks show, but I figure it will just end up as always watching the guy over the road mow his lawn and the mates checking out the form of the ladies strolling by. Either way my Saturday night Sunday is sorted

Of course i'm going to look stupid if it happens huh?

TheGlyphstone · « **Reply #34 on:** May 20, 2011, 10:27:03 AM »

Quote from: despickable on May 20, 2011, 10:25:19 AM

Of course i'm going to look stupid if it happens huh?

Yeah, but you'll have all of eternity to live it down.

gaggedLouise · « **Reply #35 on:** May 20, 2011, 10:32:23 AM »

This guy will find the time, too:

Hell! by James Brown

Oniya · « **Reply #36 on:** May 20, 2011, 11:13:28 AM »

Quote from: gaggedLouise on May 20, 2011, 10:10:31 AM

Me and mine are going to see Wagner's The Valkyrie by video link to a movie theatre on Sunday, so I would be mightily miffed if the Met, and the internet, has been knocked for six by then. Plus, we would all be punished for disgracing Sunday by watching an opera involving heathen gods and heroes.

And it would be so much more appropriate to be watching Götterdämmerung, anyways.

HairyHeretic · « **Reply #37 on:** May 20, 2011, 11:34:36 AM »

Add in AC/DCs Highway to Hell maybe? :)

Avis habilis · « **Reply #38 on:** May 20, 2011, 11:55:13 AM »

Hell's Bells, maybe? After all, they're saying you don't even have to go anywhere - Hell will come to you!

Oniya · « **Reply #39 on:** May 20, 2011, 12:18:34 PM »

We thought that they were angels
But to my surprise
We climbed above their star-ship
We headed for the skies!

Styx - Come Sail Away Live 1996

TheWriter · « **Reply #40 on:** May 20, 2011, 12:32:27 PM »

Well, it's been the 21st of May for a good three and a half hours now. Nothing out of the ordinary so far.

Oniya · « **Reply #41 on:** May 20, 2011, 12:34:36 PM »

I plan on toasting 21 May as it arrives here, and (knowing my tolerance levels) having the other half of the bottle as 22 May arrives.

ReanimateMagnus · « **Reply #42 on:** May 20, 2011, 01:38:03 PM »

Tomorrow's my brother wedding. I hope we don't all disappear, with the exception of a cousin who shall not be named...

Star Safyre · « **Reply #43 on:** May 20, 2011, 02:40:33 PM »

Just in case anyone was unclear on whether or not you will be raptured:

Oniya · « **Reply #44 on:** May 20, 2011, 02:56:18 PM »

*chuckles*

Kyrsa · « **Reply #45 on:** May 20, 2011, 03:10:23 PM »

*laughs* Nice find Star, very amusing.

gaggedLouise · « **Reply #46 on:** May 20, 2011, 03:26:15 PM »

I always found the idea of the Seventh Day Adventists, that God would have made it the key point of recognition to see which day of the week He is worshipped on, an amazing notion. Since 99% of Christians settled for Sunday, they must be condemned on the last day: they were one day out of sync for two thousand years! I remember reading in the Bible that "a thousand years are like one day to you, Lord" but apparently in this one, a lag of one day at the outset is all-important.

Star Safyre · « **Reply #47 on:** May 20, 2011, 06:13:38 PM »

And once again, The Oatmeal is awesome and timely.

Starlequin · « **Reply #48 on:** May 20, 2011, 06:21:27 PM »

...I just laughed so hard I popped out a contact. It was my last one...

And it was still worth it.

Oniya · « **Reply #49 on:** May 20, 2011, 06:22:42 PM »

Quote from: Twitter

If Harold Camping is so sure about his prediction for the end of the world on Saturday, why does his ministry continue to accept donations?