One-shot as a preview of what I can do for a story. May make more chapters if I can get around to it.
Neo Cerinia Hunter...what could you say about him? Ok, besides the fact that he tended to be womanizing at times, and hard a soft spot for the non-family friendly, but that could be easily overlooked by the anti-terrorist organization that hired him. When he wasn't attempting to be a casanova or working his day job at the local McDonald's, he was out hunting a special kind of terrorist organization that believed all of Mobius should become as thin as they show on Earth tabloids. In other words, nearly 50% underweight, as there isn't a word for the exact opposite of obese besides "dead". The reason they were considered a terrorist organization and not some whackjob cult was because they tended to commit terrorist acts, from destruction of important buildings to kidnap and mind control. They called themselves "dietists". The rest of the world called them "Sticks". And that's where Neo's organization comes in, the Stick Assassins. Led by a mysterious figure, whose identity no-one but the highest in the organization knew, and even they were sworn to secrecy. Many rumors abounded about the mysterious figure, from his name and origin to the wolf/fox hybrid girl that was normally seen hovering around him like a lovestruck bodyguard.
But Neo wasn't focusing on the gossip, right now he was focusing on a mission: Sticks had set up a base deep in the deserts of Dust Hill Zone, a fact Neo was ready to strangle them for, as it was sweltering and he was running low on water. The green wolf/fox hybrid looked around the desert, and could swear he spied a Wal-Mart off in the distance. He frowned, and thought "Damn mirages..." But unfortunately, he had to take the bait as the Wal-Mart was in the direction he was supposed to go. He growled and headed towards it, steeling himself for the inevitable disappointment.
Minutes later, he went into the back of the Wal-Mart while chugging down a Pepsi. Ok, so he was wrong about it being a mirage, who knew? Plus the Stick HQ was underneath it as well. Coincidence? Not really, Neo figured they needed a cool place to build their base, so they decided to build one underneath here. As the manager led him to a mysterious stairway, he paid him $500 Mobian Dollars ($700 US dollars) for the information, and also for the newest gaming handheld and a game to go with it, then descended the staircase, tossing his soda bottle in the trash beforehand.
As he descended, he noticed a majority of stick propaganda, detailing various ways to lower weight to their desired level, their most popular one being the "1 Tip to a Flat Belly" posters similar to those you see as internet ads, only the tip is actually shown: "Eat nothing, and anything you do eat, throw right back up." He scowled, thinking about how they were giving anorexics a bad name. He stopped as he noticed two stick guards guarding the entrance into the base itself. His scowl became more pronounced as he saw the ribs in their chests and their otherwise severely malnourished bodies, knowing they consider it the height of attractiveness and refuse to do anything about it. That's fine, he can always send them to Mischief so he can deal with them. He held out his hand and with a flash of green light, a sledgehammer appeared in his hand. The stick guards noticed the light and pointed their guns towards it "Who's there?!" One of them shouted, but no answer. The guards eventually went back to their posts, only to suddenly feel a sharp pain in the backs of their heads, seconds before they fell to the ground dead. Neo withdrew the sledgehammer and rifled through their pockets for the key card. That was just the easy part.