Perverted Wishes

Started by Ellyssa, September 15, 2006, 11:50:39 AM

Previous topic - Next topic

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Kalen

It doesn't, as you lose all feeling in your body... including pleasure.  Forever.  *sniffs sadly at the thought*

I wish that I had more ideas!

Paradox

#751
(I think I already have that wish-perversion that you inflicted upon dart)

Granted. Now you don't have a throat at all. I'll let you figure out how your anatomy will be altered by that fact.

I wish that winding the clock back really did reverse time.

Edit:

Damnit, Kalen beat me to it again.

Granted-- They're all very terrible ideas that even the worst writer of cheesy B-movies wouldn't dare to put on paper, let alone publish.

I wish that winding the clock back really did reverse time.


"More than ever, the creation of the ridiculous is almost impossible because of the competition it receives from reality."-Robert A. Baker

Kalen

(I already HAVE that... I guess you don't read my stories *lol*)

Granted, but by accident, you wind it forward instead, and too quickly... hastening your death. 

I wish that healthy food tasted GOOD.

MusicNeverDies

It tastes great, however because of that it becomes incredibly pricey, only the richest people affording it, the rest of the country becomes morbidly obese.

I wish certain people would learn to grow up.

Paradox

Granted. They learn how to but still don't bother to actually do so.

I wish the gas stations would install temperature regulators for the gas like they do in Canada.


"More than ever, the creation of the ridiculous is almost impossible because of the competition it receives from reality."-Robert A. Baker

MusicNeverDies

Granted, but because of costs it makes gas soar even higher, by at least a dollar.

I wish I could go see Dark Knight again.

WyldRanger

You do, but this time the movie is played backwards.

I wish my sinus meds would let me watch The Dark Knight all the way through for once. *ugh*

MusicNeverDies

(Even so, I'd love it!)
Granted, your sinus meds let you. But the people at the ticket counter don't, and they are what matters.

I wish my first chapter would write itself.

Maeven

It does, but it writes you into a corner you have no hope of recovering from.

I wish that my vocabulary was not so limited.
What a wicked game to play, to make me feel this way.
What a wicked thing to do, to let me dream of you.
What a wicked thing to say, you never felt this way.
What a wicked thing to do, to make me dream of you. 


The Cardinal Rule

MusicNeverDies

Granted, however because of your expanse vocabulary all your partners either drop you, or take several days to reply because they are trying to decipher it.

I wish it was cheaper to go to the movies.

Kalen

The quality of the movies drop as the price does... enjoy Batman 3, starring Rob Schneider!  And it's not a comedy.   At least... not intentionally.

I wish I had a new laptop.

Bliss

You get a new laptop! It's a flea-ridden stray named Fluffernuts, hates everyone except you, and loves to sharpen its claws on your softest bits... which are conveniently easy to get to when it's on your lap.

I wish I could re-do my morning.
O/O ~ Wiki ~ A/A ~ Discord: Bliss#0337
I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing.
Only I will remain.
<3 <3 <3

Kalen

Quote from: Bliss on July 29, 2008, 08:25:14 AM
You get a new laptop! It's a flea-ridden stray named Fluffernuts, hates everyone except you, and loves to sharpen its claws on your softest bits... which are conveniently easy to get to when it's on your lap.

I wish I could re-do my morning.

Your wish is granted.  It's your very own Groundhog Day, and you get to relive it over, and over, and over...

I wish I understood the appeal of... popular people.

Paradox

Granted, but in order to understand it, you had to become one, thus turning your brain into a mushy puddle of Hollywood-flavored oatmeal.

I wish I wasn't wearing any pants.




Oh, nevermind, granted that one myself.


I wish people actually took recycling seriously.


"More than ever, the creation of the ridiculous is almost impossible because of the competition it receives from reality."-Robert A. Baker

MusicNeverDies

Granted. They take it so seriously anyone accidentally throwing out something recyclable is shot. The world becomes paranoid, and the metal saved is made into weapons so people can assassinate non-recycling neighbours. With the animosity and tension, it evolves into WW3, a war separated by families instead of countries, the most bloody war ever seen.


I wish school started later in the day.

Le RandomBloke

Granted, school starts at 2 pm, but once you entered. YOU CAN NEVER LEAVE! DUN DUN DUN




I wish plastic was as strong as diamond.

"Give me all your true hate and I’ll translate it in our bed into never seen passion."

MusicNeverDies

Granted, but it also becomes as expensive as diamond.


I wish my water bottles didn't get condensation all along the sides.

Kalen

Welcome to the world of drinking tepid, murky water.  Yum.

I wish that the phrase "there's no such thing as too much of a good thing" was actually true.

Maeven

Quote from: Kalen on July 30, 2008, 05:48:15 AM
Welcome to the world of drinking tepid, murky water.  Yum.

I wish that the phrase "there's no such thing as too much of a good thing" was actually true.

Me too incidentally....

Granted.  There is no such thing as 'too much of a good thing'; but you never get any of the said good things. 


I wish that I could run 5 miles without stopping. 
What a wicked game to play, to make me feel this way.
What a wicked thing to do, to let me dream of you.
What a wicked thing to say, you never felt this way.
What a wicked thing to do, to make me dream of you. 


The Cardinal Rule

Kalen

#769
You manage it easily.  When you DO stop, the clowns eat you.  After you rise, you run no more!

I wish that today was a blue moon.

Maeven

Quote from: Kalen on July 30, 2008, 08:54:17 AM
You manage it easily.  When you DO stop, the clowns eat you.  After you rise, you run no more!

GAH! Clowns!

Quote
I wish that today was a blue moon.

Me too, incidentally.

It is, but there's also a lunar eclipse, so you can't see it. 


I wish that it was already NEXT Wednesday. 


What a wicked game to play, to make me feel this way.
What a wicked thing to do, to let me dream of you.
What a wicked thing to say, you never felt this way.
What a wicked thing to do, to make me dream of you. 


The Cardinal Rule

Kalen

It IS next Wednesday.  But you feel like you missed something important... unfortunately, so does your boss.

I wish I could lose 30 lbs.

Paradox

Granted. You could...but you don't.


I wish products were more forthright about the presence of MSG.


"More than ever, the creation of the ridiculous is almost impossible because of the competition it receives from reality."-Robert A. Baker

Hollin

Granted.   MSG warnings are added to all products....but they fail to dislose the presence of arsenic, lead, and asbestos in those same products.

I wish the weekend didn't have to end.

Kalen

They don't.  And the banks never open anymore... civilization collapses.  Just as it was getting interesting.

I wish I could make up my mind about something important.