Corrupt a wish

[Zelta Runa]

Granted. Instead you have hay flu, which is far worse.

I wish my ear didn't hurt so often.

[Dred2967]

Granted.  You have your perfectly spacious art studio with amazing lighting and all the equipment you need.  It's located in the worse part of the city and sirens are always heard, bullets have gone threw windows, plus if you step outside your door you will be mugged and probably killed. 

I wish to retire tomorrow and have enough money to live for these rest of my life. 

[c2u]

Granted ... as you get your medical check up for your journey around the world, the doctor sees that little dark spot on the x-ray of your lungs ....

I wish I could fly like a bird

[Luna Skywind]

Granted, but once you begin to fly, you will only drift closer and closer to the sun, never to come back to earth.

I wish I could end world hunger.

[Adammair]

Granted...the world is no longer hungry, simply because the entire population has become cannibalistic zombies!

I wish I could walk on water.

[Avernale]

Granted.  Your body is completely hydrophobic and repels water to such intensity that bodies of water are effectively solid.  However, all liquids are repelled from you, preventing you from being able to drink and you die of dehydration.

I wish I could breath in space.

[Lior]

Granted. You are able to breathe in space, but are now unable to breathe unless in space. Unfortunately, the other terrible side effects of an unprotected human body in space also still apply.



I wish my vision were 20/20 uncorrected.

*edit: spelling

[WordSmith]

I wish the person would've posted a wish

[Soulfire]

Granted! Except I didn’t actually have to grant anything, because I see a wish there.

I wish I could have my cake and eat it, too.

[WordSmith]

Granted. However, it is the self-gaining pound for pound cake!

I wish I could've known the secret that changes lives for the better

[Beguile's Mistress]

Granted!  Though while you can do it for others it is like magic and doesn't always work on yourself.

I wish the day would always end on and upbeat note.

[WordSmith]

Granted, however, you find yourself in the back of a cop car with the band playing a well-choreographed tune on your way out of the bar.

I wish I had Jordans.

[Story Tale]

Granted, but the only ones left are half a size too small so they kind of pinch.

I wish to never do laundry again.

[Soulfire]

Granted! You now have to wear the clothes you have on (or don't have on) for the rest of your life.

I wish there was a users manual for life.

[WordSmith]

Granted, unfortunately it's an ancient scroll from the early Babylonian era and so far they can only decipher the top of the page which says 'User Manual for Human Life.'

I wish I could write  a book with Stephen King

[Story Tale]

Granted but he writes with a squeaky pencil and that drives you half mad by the second chapter.

I wish I had a pet pegasus.

[Merry Gentry]

Granted but it bites you every time you come close, so rides are out of the question

I wish I was wealthy

[WordSmith]

Granted, but it's in a trust fund that you can't touch for 25 years.

I wish I could have a loyal girlfriend.

[Story Tale]

Granted, so loyal that she has a flag made of you and flies it on her lawn. She gets your name tattooed on her forehead and there are whispers that she is staging a coup at your workplace in your honor.

I wish I could fly.

[Merry Gentry]

Granted but you can never land.  You are forever in the air.

I wish it was sunny out

[WordSmith]

Granted, just another sunny day in the middle of a dessert filled with mines.

I wish I could be single.

[Soulfire]

Okay, from someone who just divorced in September, I'm going to pause this thread just to hug you, because I'm sorry that you're in a tough spot. *hugs tight*

Back on topic, granted! You're single in every aspect - no significant other, one eye, half a nose, one arm, leg, kidney.. Sorry dude. That's rough.

I wish I could actually finish a cup of coffee for once in my life.

[Story Tale]

Granted, now every cup you make only contains one sip. Its the last sip as well... all full of coffee grounds and an inappropriate ratio of cream to coffee.

I wish I could learn another language in a day.

[Shekinah]

Granted however you now can only speak that language and forget every other language you ever learned. Also did I mention it are only the dead languages you can learn?

I wish I had a fresh pot of curry rice for dinner

[Merry Gentry]

Granted, but you are highly allergic to Curry and break out in hives, and where is that EPI pen? 

I wish it was summer already