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Perverted Wishes

Started by Ellyssa, September 15, 2006, 11:50:39 AM

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Custos Morum

... and I wish I was psychically unable to become depressed, living a happy life no matter what.

Atlus

Granted. One frontal lobotomy  coming right up.

I wish the soda I just put in the fridge was cold now.
How profound such profanity can be.

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Paradox

Granted. It becomes cold so fast that the pressure within can't balance with the external pressure; so, it explodes, thus ruining your drink altogether.

I wish sodas still held as much in the can as they did when I was a kid. They seemed so much bigger back then.


"More than ever, the creation of the ridiculous is almost impossible because of the competition it receives from reality."-Robert A. Baker

Custos Morum

granted. You are endowed with the size-measuring abilities of a 5 year old

Paradox

*uses his new abilities* Hey wow, my penis is huge!


"More than ever, the creation of the ridiculous is almost impossible because of the competition it receives from reality."-Robert A. Baker

Custos Morum

ah damn forgot wish again:

I wish a was the best, heterosexual male, lover in the wrorld.

Ket

Granted.  But now all the women are gone.   Forever.

I wish I had a mountain dew and some cupcakes.
she wears strength and darkness equally well, the girl has always been half goddess, half hell

you can find me on discord Ket#8117
Ons & Offs~Menagerie~Pulse~Den of Iniquity
wee little Ketlings don't yet have the ability to spit forth flame with the ferocity needed to vanquish a horde of vehicular bound tiny arachnids.

WyldRanger

granted...but the cupcakes are stale and the dew is well....flat

I wish my sinus' weren't so bloody awful...

MusicNeverDies

Granted. You no longer have a nose, so you can't smell, and peopel are judgemental so they boot you out because of your appearance.

I wish my house was warmer.

Kalen

Much, MUCH too warm... you barely escape the fire.

I wish I could have company, as I work 13 hours today.

Custos Morum

Granted. You now own a securitycompany with one employee, you. You now work 15 hours every day.

I wish I knew the answer to life, universe and everything

The Overlord

Wishing Imp grants your wish, but you must wait until Christmas 2029.  :P



I wish to be able to control the flow of time and exist outside of it at will.

Custos Morum

Granted, but the extreme power and the knowledge of every second through infinity makes your brain go mashed potatoes.

I wish I had a pair of unerpants

jstarz

Granted but it's a chastity belt and locked tight.

I wish I knew how to play lacrosse.

Custos Morum

Granted, but as soon as you learn it, the sport is magically deleted from time. You now know a sport that no one plays.

jstarz

I wish that Custos gave us a wish to grant

Custos Morum

granted XD

I wish catgirls excisted for real, and that they would be hawt.

jstarz

Granted, but not only are you one but you happen to live in a house with a crazy old "cat lady."

I wish I knew where I was going tonight.

Custos Morum

granted, you are going down.

I wish my name was Pete

jstarz

Granted but your last name is Rose and you're still banned from Baseball.

I wish for a turkey on rye.

shadowheart

Granted, a drunk and very live turkey sossed up on whisky takes up residence in your living room.

I wish to have the time to do everything I want.

jstarz

Granted, but now you don't know what you want to do.

I wish there was something good to watch on TV.

Atlus

Granted. There are now numerous quality programs on television, in broadcasting districts other then yours.

I wish I could transform myself in any way I see fit.
How profound such profanity can be.

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Custos Morum

Granted, but you have been blind your whole life, leaving you uncapable of imaging any form of appearance.

I wish I had a maiden that cleaned my apartment.

Kalen

Your wish is granted... you're given a sex change, and told to tidy up.

I wish that gas was cheaper.