Last Poster Wins

Started by Tigataga, January 16, 2014, 02:02:27 AM

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Boatman

The tranquilliser dart says otherwise.

Unpicks Syk's fingers from win.
Hmm.. about half an hour to get away.
Rides off (recently learned) on Syk's horse.
History, where creative writing was born.

Dys Astyr

Wakes up sometime later

You stole my horse...

YOU STOLE MY HORSE!!!

BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT!

Rounds up a posse and goes after the horse rustling thief
Alive! Trying to catch up but there is a lot, please be patient! Thank you. <3

wander

Wander-Prime literally punches his way into this dimension and in the surprise of a reboot of the entire franchise, he somehow has the Win because it's a reboot, so there... Don't question it, we're not worrying about what happened before, it's a new universe with new takes on the characters, see?

And Wander has the Win :)

Dys Astyr

And Wander loses the Win in the vacuum caused by the hole he punched in the dimension. It clatters back to the other side and falls ever so conveniently into Syk's pocket.
Alive! Trying to catch up but there is a lot, please be patient! Thank you. <3

Boatman

Except, when the time lords adjust for random error, they award the Win to Boat, yehhh.
History, where creative writing was born.

Dys Astyr

What on earth (and elsewhere) are the time lords doing taking the Win out of my pocket? I call shenanigans.

Looks at the Ref, who calls DQ, thus the Win is awarded to Syk by default.
Alive! Trying to catch up but there is a lot, please be patient! Thank you. <3

wander

Its mine now though.

Because.

;)

Dys Astyr

I'm afraid  ;) is not a valid reason...

So not only do you not get the Win, but you must now also listen to Vogon poetry.
May whatever gods you keep have mercy on your soul...

Oh freddled gruntbuggly,
    Thy micturitions are to me,
    As plurdled gabbleblotchits,
    On a lurgid bee,
    That mordiously hath blurted out,
    Its earted jurtles,
    Into a rancid festering confectious organ squealer.
    Now the jurpling slayjid agrocrustles,
    Are slurping hagrilly up the axlegrurts,
    And living glupules frart and slipulate,
    Like jowling meated liverslime,
    Groop, I implore thee, my foonting turling dromes,
    And hooptiously drangle me,
    With crinkly bindlewurdles,
    Or else I shall rend thee in the gobberwarts with my blurglecruncheon,
    See if I don't.
Alive! Trying to catch up but there is a lot, please be patient! Thank you. <3

Boatman

Boat spaketh thus:

With weapons and armour. I shall lead you in person;
To my war-trusty vassals command I shall issue
To keep from all injury your excellent vessel,
Your boat shall be well cared for during your stay here.
Your fresh-tarred craft, ’gainst every opposer
Close by the sea-shore, till the curved-necked bark shall
Waft back again the well-beloved hero
O’er the way of the water to Weder dominions.
He again compliments Beowulf.
To warrior so great ’twill be granted sure
In the storm of strife to stand secure.
Onward they fared then,
The broad-bosomed bark was bound by its cable;
the boar-signs glistened
Bright on the visors vivid with gilding...

Until Syk fell sleepeth und Boat haveth t'Win.
History, where creative writing was born.

Dys Astyr

Syk found that terribly amusing so she can't even be bothered to pretend to be livid about it, simply swipes the Win back with her lacrosse stick.



Alive! Trying to catch up but there is a lot, please be patient! Thank you. <3

Boatman

Except it is life or death in the gladiator ring.
Boat with his net and trident and Syk with her lacrosse stick.
He casts the net and, following a struggle, the Win is reeled in.
History, where creative writing was born.

Dys Astyr

( Blood soaking filthy sand... Does it always end this way?

Does for every gladiator I've ever written.)

Snaps out of the weird place her brain has wandered.

Rolls to her feet and dusts herself off, ducks in close and thumps Boat across the back of the knees, knocking him down.

Swipes the Win and quickly ducks out of a side door because she's seen this movie and the gladiatrix never gets a good ending.



Alive! Trying to catch up but there is a lot, please be patient! Thank you. <3

Boatman

The Emperor hires Syk as his new personal guard.
This position comes with good pay and perks.
Boat takes the Win when Syk has to discard the old drab uniform and put on the new sparkly one.
History, where creative writing was born.

Dys Astyr

Hey, body guard, well at least I ended up having one of the occupations I wanted as a child...

Uses her additional money to hire a particularly sultry maiden to seduce Boat and steal the Win back

;D

Creative problem solving for the Win, literally.
Alive! Trying to catch up but there is a lot, please be patient! Thank you. <3

Boatman

And everyone lived happily after.

Except.

One day Boat was walking out with his worn out wife and ten children when he spotted the Win, there atop the Temple of Wins and he had to have it.
So he kissed his wife farewell, left her all his money and took the Win on a galley ride to the furthest ends of the known world seeking adventure
(he was so shallow, wasn't he boys and girls?).
History, where creative writing was born.

Dys Astyr

Boat sailed to the ends of the known world, and further (against all reasoning and advisements) tipping over the edge and into the great Void beyond.

Curiously he did not perish, which is lucky indeed as this story would be quite short.

After sailing through that great Beyond which is mostly Void and partially stars Boat found he could remember less and less why he had wanted the Win in the first place.

Time passed, but in the Void, what is time? Days, years, it did not matter. Time was passing, and sooner (or possibly later) he looked upon the Win and felt nothing. It's sparkle no longer dazzled, its triumph no longer fulfilled.

So he cast it over the side, into the starry abyss, where it glimmered for the fleeting moment like a star itself and then disappeared.

It reappeared in the most unlikely of places, on earth, in a tea cup that just happened to be unfortunately full of tea at the time, making quite a mess.

So you will have to excuse me from my story telling a moment while I get a towel to clean up the mess and put the Win up someplace safe.
Alive! Trying to catch up but there is a lot, please be patient! Thank you. <3

wander

Wander just scrolled to the bottom of the page without reading the posts and claims the Win.

Valid reason: Because he can and as such he did ;)

Boatman

Turning the tea stained page in the popup book, Boat finds the Win behind a cupboard door.
His love for the Win returns and they are reunited.

The end.
History, where creative writing was born.

River

Great book! I'm glad it's over!
𝖲𝗍𝖺𝗍𝗎𝗌: Open to suggestions for future scenarios.
𝖫𝗂𝗄𝖾𝗌 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝖣𝗂𝗌𝗅𝗂𝗄𝖾𝗌
𝖥𝗋𝖾𝗊𝗎𝖾𝗇𝖼𝗒: within 48-72 hours.

Boatman

And Boat is glad he still has the Win.
History, where creative writing was born.

River

𝖲𝗍𝖺𝗍𝗎𝗌: Open to suggestions for future scenarios.
𝖫𝗂𝗄𝖾𝗌 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝖣𝗂𝗌𝗅𝗂𝗄𝖾𝗌
𝖥𝗋𝖾𝗊𝗎𝖾𝗇𝖼𝗒: within 48-72 hours.

Boatman

History, where creative writing was born.

River

𝖲𝗍𝖺𝗍𝗎𝗌: Open to suggestions for future scenarios.
𝖫𝗂𝗄𝖾𝗌 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝖣𝗂𝗌𝗅𝗂𝗄𝖾𝗌
𝖥𝗋𝖾𝗊𝗎𝖾𝗇𝖼𝗒: within 48-72 hours.

wander

Because it is I who has the Win now!

Bwahahahahahahahahahahaha!

*runs away*

Saiyuri

Sorry, love.
But it is I, Sai, who has the Win.