Perverted Wishes

Started by Ellyssa, September 15, 2006, 11:50:39 AM

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jstarz

Granted but you find yourself incredibly bored by the infomercials on at 3AM so you decide to try to get back to bed only to fail.

I wish my optometrist was free.

maidjennifer

Quote from: jstarz on October 16, 2008, 12:44:04 PM
Granted but you find yourself incredibly bored by the infomercials on at 3AM so you decide to try to get back to bed only to fail.

I wish my optometrist was free.

Wish granted. You have a lovely evening together and enjoy each other's company.

I wish I could star in my own TV show.

Inkidu

Wish granted, you are the star character of My Mother the Car. The shortest running show ever. (Three episodes I think.) Oh and you're also a car.

I wish I was always correct.
If you're searching the lines for a point, well you've probably missed it; there was never anything there in the first place.

jstarz

Granted but people still think you're a stuck up ass hole and don't listen to you.

I wish somebody would call me.

Inkidu

Wish granted you are constantly called by annoying telemarketers.

I wish that I had a super-fast internet connection.
If you're searching the lines for a point, well you've probably missed it; there was never anything there in the first place.

jstarz

Granted but that means that spyware, spam, and other bad things download super fast and clog up your connection.

I wish I didn't have this pounding headache. 

Inkidu

Granted you're castrated and without any anesthesia.

I wish I could have all the money I'll ever need. Just by pulling it out of my pocket. 
If you're searching the lines for a point, well you've probably missed it; there was never anything there in the first place.

Revolverman

Quote from: Inkidu on October 17, 2008, 07:41:54 PM
Granted you're castrated and without any anesthesia.

I wish I could have all the money I'll ever need. Just by pulling it out of my pocket. 

Granted, you cause hyperinflation and ruin the wealth of all, and killed.


I wish I had more pop.

Inkidu

Quote from: Revolverman on October 17, 2008, 08:37:49 PM
Granted, you cause hyperinflation and ruin the wealth of all, and killed.


I wish I had more pop.
Wish granted every step you take now emits the sound of a loud firecracker going off. You spook and are consequently stampeded by a herd of marmots. A lot of marmots.

I wish I ruled the world. 
If you're searching the lines for a point, well you've probably missed it; there was never anything there in the first place.

delle

Granted, your Majesty.

I wish I were just two inches taller.

Inkidu

(Well how is that a perversion of my wish? ???)
If you're searching the lines for a point, well you've probably missed it; there was never anything there in the first place.

delle

(It's a perversion of a perverted wish  ;D)

Inkidu

Quote from: delle on October 18, 2008, 09:49:33 AM
(It's a perversion of a perverted wish  ;D)
(Not seeing it.)
If you're searching the lines for a point, well you've probably missed it; there was never anything there in the first place.

jstarz

I wish Inkidu's wish was perverted.

MusicNeverDies

Granted, but then it becomes a sentient event and happens to you specifically.

I wish this thread was back in order.

Kalen

Granted.  But you have to personally retype every single post for that to happen.

I wish that I wasn't such a drama magnet!

Ket

Granted, but now you're a Drama Queen!  Complete with pink power suit, overly done make-up and a bad 80's wig.

I wish I had a faster laptop.
she wears strength and darkness equally well, the girl has always been half goddess, half hell

you can find me on discord Ket#8117
Ons & Offs~Menagerie~Pulse~Den of Iniquity
wee little Ketlings don't yet have the ability to spit forth flame with the ferocity needed to vanquish a horde of vehicular bound tiny arachnids.

MusicNeverDies

Quote from: Ket on October 21, 2008, 05:01:13 PM
Granted, but now you're a Drama Queen!  Complete with pink power suit, overly done make-up and a bad 80's wig.

I wish I had a faster laptop.
Granted, but now you have no internet access.

I wish I could write more often.

jstarz

Granted, but you just write a bunch of threatening letters to celebrities begging for money.

I wish it was a little bit warmer.

Inkidu

Quote from: MusicNeverDies on October 21, 2008, 07:20:47 PM
Granted, but now you have no internet access.

I wish I could write more often.
Granted but you can no longer listen to music ever in trade.

I wish, I had a two-hundred I.Q.
If you're searching the lines for a point, well you've probably missed it; there was never anything there in the first place.

Paradox

Granted, but you suck at life.

I wish I could find that last winning McNopoly piece!


"More than ever, the creation of the ridiculous is almost impossible because of the competition it receives from reality."-Robert A. Baker

jstarz

Granted but you have to eat thousands of boxes of fries, and although it tastes good you wind up with massively elevated blood pressure resulting in a heart attack when you find it, you wind up spending your winnings on your medical bills.

I wish my last wish wasn't skipped over.

OllieGarkey

Granted, but all wishes you make from now on WILL be. Oh, and your pants are on fire.

I wish I wasn't going to be in trouble toniight.

jstarz

Granted, your wife finds out about it tomorrow night.

I wish I had some new socks.

WyldRanger

Granted, but they mismatched and are the wrong size.

I wish I had new shoes!