One-Up!

[Starkweather]

It's simple. Just one-up the person above you!

Feel free to be as outrageous as you want to be (within PG-13).

I shall begin.

I can climb trees.

[Sweet Innocence]

I can rock climb.

[Starkweather]

I can climb mountains.

[Andy]

I can lift mountains

[Skye]

I eat mountains for breakfast.

[Starkweather]

I eat planets for breakfast.

[Beguile's Mistress]

I east the Milky Way for breakfast

[Skye]

I eat Beguile's Mistress and everything she ate today, for lunch!
>.>
<.<
>_<

[Dizzi]

I eat time itself, losing specified meal times.

[Starkweather]

I ate God.

[Dizzi]

I stop being a glutton and don;t eat.

[Professor Loki Caprion]

I not only stopped eating; I gave up on that whole breathing nonsense.

[Reverend Bonobo]

Not eating was fun for a few years, but now I've moved beyond it into anti-eating.
I put feces into my colon, and several hours later I cough up a fully-formed cheeseburger.

When I stopped breathing I grew gills, so the smell doesn't bother me.

[Kyung Soon]

Pfft.

I stopped living.
Then I decided it was boring.
So I decided to resurrect myself.
Your breathing, and gills, and eating of things?
It does not impress me.

x3

[Dizzi]

well, I am anti-living.  I was born from a grave as an old man.

[Lady Haven]

I was created from the breath of magic and spun into corporal form...

[Dizzi]

I am magic.

[Duncan]

I invented magic.

[Dizzi]

I invented air

[Full Metal]

I can fly

[Reverend Bonobo]

I am a fly.

Help meeeee... Help meeeee....

[Dizzi]

I am a bee

[Professor Loki Caprion]

I'm Eric the Half-A-Bee.

[Dizzi]

I'm Erikson a viking

[Professor Loki Caprion]

I'm a Sony Ericcson

[Dizzi]

I'm an iPhone

[Beguile's Mistress]

I am a 4th generation prototype

[Professor Loki Caprion]

I'm a 4th Generation Lasombra.

[Dizzi]

I;m a dictionary so people will know what a lisombra is

[Professor Loki Caprion]

I'm WikiPedia, where you can far more easily figure out what a Lasombra is:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lasombra

[Dizzi]

I'm uncyclopedia

[Starkweather]

I'm a 3rd Generation Ventrue.

Eff yoo, LaSombra.

[Scribbles]

I'm a leather wearing, stake strapped, vampire slayer!   :-)

[Skye]

I am the wooden stake that gave you a splinter, that went unchecked. Leading to gangrene that caused the hand you use to kill vampires to get infected. Causing you to spend your nights applying topical medication only to have the hand amputated in the end. Me...I did that. ;) 

[scrapmask]

I am the topical medication that not only saved their life, I cured the common cold, male pattern baldness, erectile dysfunction, and depression.

Side effects include greasy oily discharge and the semi-controllable ability to teleport.

[Starkweather]

I'm the Plague.

[scrapmask]

Really? Because I'm 1/3 penicillin.

[Dizzi]

I'm 100% penicillin

[scrapmask]

I am the corporate ad campaign set out to slander the medicine Penicillin.

[Dizzi]

I'm the Pepsi Advritising crew

[Andy]

Im a Hologram Projector

[Dizzi]

I'm the powersource

[Andy]

Im the Inventor (god)

[Dizzi]

I'm a worshipper (God would be essentially non0-existant w/o worshippers)

[monkeymana]

i'm a church where you worshippers go and worship a god

[Dizzi]

I'm a supporting wall

[monkeymana]

i'm the arch with you supporting me

[Dizzi]

I am the St. Louis Arch

[monkeymana]

i'm St, Louis' cheese factory

[Dizzi]

I'm money that paid for the factory

[monkeymana]

i'm a penny on an adventure

[Dizzi]

I'm the train that flattens the penny

[monkeymana]

i'm the sign that the train missed and fell off a bridge

[Dizzi]

I a roadowrker who put the sign up

[monkeymana]

i'm a hole that the roadworker forgot to fill and fell into

[Dizzi]

I'm a bulldozer who fillls the hole after the worker gets out.  thus killing the hole

[monkeymana]

i'm a stone that gets stuck in the bulldozer, making it die suddenly

[Scribbles]

I'm a meteor that obliterates both stone and bulldozer.  ;D

[Dizzi]

I'm the atmsphere that sestroyed the meteor enough to only destroy the bulldozer.  and not the planet earth.

[monkeymana]

i'm the cow that adds carbon dioxide into the atmosphere with my belches

[Dizzi]

I'm the butcher.  'nuff said

[monkeymana]

i'm the butcher's boss who fires him for doing a bad job of things

[Dizzi]

I'm the government and closes down the business

[monkeymana]

i'm guy fawkes, trying to blow the government uo

[Professor Loki Caprion]

I'm V for Vendetta, making Guy Fawkes famous in modern day America.

[Dizzi]

I'm anonomous.  trying to be cool by wearing the guy fawkes mask

[scrapmask]

I'm scientology...pissing off anon. for years.

[monkeymana]

i'm the big bang which puzzled science for years

[The Joker]

I'm Stephen Hawking - I've got your number, mate.

[scrapmask]

I'm a stick that gets stuck in between the wheel of your chair...I've got YOUR number!  ;)

[monkeymana]

i'm a dog that wants to chew you up and spit you out

[scrapmask]

I'm a fisher cat...making domestic animals disappear and annoying hunters.

[Starkweather]

Uhm. 'Scuse me.

I think this thread got a lil' off track.

[scrapmask]

Uhm. 'Scuse me.

I think this thread got a lil' off track.

I thought this was the point of the game?
We'd try and one up each other...and being ridiculous was allowed. And it's gotten pretty ridiculous!  ;D

[Dizzi]

I'm a fisher cat...making domestic animals disappear and annoying hunters.

I'm a gun

[monkeymana]

i'm a furnace to melt the gun

[Dizzi]

I jsut realized.  we ARE going off topic.  oops.  it's supposed be like.  gun to cannon.  Not what you can do to stop the previous item.  So I think that we should start a new game.


I'm a dictionary

[Professor Loki Caprion]

I'm an UNABRIDGED dictionary.

[Dizzi]

I'm a thesaurus!

[Reverend Bonobo]

I'm a tyrannosaurus.

[Dizzi]

(haha! Awesome!)
is an aligator.  I survived the meteor

[scrapmask]

I'm a tiger...warm blooded and capable of opening my mouth even if elastics are holding it shut.

[Dizzi]

I'ma lion.  King of the jungle!

[Scribbles]

I'm an elephant!

*squish*

[scrapmask]

I am an ivory hunter. King of the poachers!

[Dizzi]

I'm a bear trap, which traps the trapper

[scrapmask]

I'm a pit trap. Complete with sharpened sticks.

[Dizzi]

I'm a mine

[scrapmask]

I'm a mime.

[Starkweather]

It is.

But to one-up someone your one-up has to be relevant to what you're one-upping.

Ex: "I can trees!" is one-upped by "I can climb mountains!"

Last few pages is just.. randomness.

So, if someone could get things back on track, I'd be very happy. If not, oh well. Go crazy.

So long as everyone's having fun.

Edit: Nevermind. Dizzi got things back on track.

Thanks, Dizzi. I owe you one.

[Dizzi]

your welcome :)

You're a mime?

I'm an orator.  I can talk

[Lone]

I can sing...  >:(

[Dizzi]

I use autotune and get rich

[Lady Haven]

*I drive a Ferrari ::)*

[Starkweather]

I don't need money.

People give me stuff for free.

[Dizzi]

People pay me to give me stuff

[Scribbles]

I just take stuff; no giving required.  :P

[Dizzi]

I'm santa, and I take the stuff you take and give it to children :)

[Prefect Mos]

I am a (thread) Necromancer , I bring the (dead) threads back to life!

[Skye]

I am the devil, stealing your black soul to eat for dinner. Yum!

[Aiden]

I am the devil, get back to filing my papers!  >:)

[Saerrael]

I'm a Seraph. You do not impress me. I was made to cleanse 'evil' from everything!

Sorry, boss!

*smites*

[Prefect Mos]

I am an Athiest, in my world you only exist on paper, so i scrunch you up, and toss you away.

[Dukat]

I am secretly Richard Dawkins.

[Prefect Mos]

I am James Randi

[Dukat]

I am Merlin.

[Prefect Mos]

I am Gandolf the Gray

[Dukat]

I am anti-magic zone.

[EvelynMarie]

I am anti-gravity zone.