Wish granting gone wrong!

[Belle33]

Granted, you've taken some pills to help you sleep, but now we can't wake you...uh oh!

I wish I had more pictures from my childhood.  I'm the youngest sibling and honestly, it seems like my mom just lost interest by the time she got to me - lol.

[rhev]

Granted, you find the huge trove of pictures of you as a child.  Unfortunately you find out that you used to be a Siamese twin.... you blocked that out because of survivors guilt.

I wish I had super powers.

[Belle33]

Granted.  You have the power of flight.  Unfortunately, you go all Icarus with it, get too close to the sun and fry.

I wish I could be more helpful to my friends 

[boegiboe]

Granted, you are so good at helping your friends that they always ask for your help. You no longer have time to help yourself, and fall into misery.

I wish I grew up with a girl best friend.

[Kiric Rand]

Granted, but you're whole life you here horror stories you never wanted to know

I wish I wasn't sick

[Harley]

Granted.  You live forever and become miserable as you grow more frail and old for eternity. 

I wish I had more time in the day. 

[Belle33]

Granted, but now your days are so long that it takes forever to get to the weekend - which are now shorter to make up the difference. 

I wish I understood men.

[rhev]

Granted, enjoy your new penis and testicles along with the ability to think logically for a change.  :D

I wish it weren't so humid out.

[Chocolate Sin]

Granted! The searing heat of a newly created star evaporates all water off of the earth. Life as we know it is utterly extinguished, but it's a dry heat.

I wish I were better at retaining my focus.

[Belle33]

Granted, your focus is now so sharp that it slices through anyone who has your attention - leaving nothing but their entrails in your mind's wake.  I'm making this retroactive, so rhev is your first victim - he deserves it after his last comment.   >:)

I wish I could untwist some people's minds *grins at that*

[boegiboe]

Granted, however everything you untwist in someone elses mind, twists your mind even further, making you go insane from the disgustingly disturbing sexual contect you see everything in.

I wish I could tune my luckiness to make the probability of whatever I choose happen to my liking with 100% certainty

[Belle33]

Grants your psychomathmetical wish that essentially lets you get what you wish for.  But since you wished for a wish they cancel each other out and you get nothing.  I can't show you the formula for this one if you like.

I wish I weren't so sleepy.

[rhev]

Granted, you now have insomnia, which any insomniac will tell you is like it's own version of hell on earth.

I wish I didn't suffer from occasional insomnia.

[Harley]

Granted.  You fall into an enchanted sleep, and...  Sadly, only an enchanted prince can wake you with a kiss.  A kiss with tongue. 

I wish I could eat ice cream all day without gaining any weight. 

[rhev]

Granted, enjoy your non stop icecream headache brain freeze.

I wish my allergies weren't so rough.

[Maxwell Malamute]

Granted, your allergies are brought under control, though in order for it to work, you have to wear a magical pink dog-collar, 24/7.

I wish I had a waterbed.

[rhev]

Granted, but the heater broke, you catch a horrible cold sleeping on a bladder of cold water all night long.


I wish some of these smexy womens would send me racy photos!

[Belle33]

Granted, gorgeous would send you loads of NASCAR pics.  Enjoy.

I wish I could focus on one task today rather than feeling scattered.

[Zaphod]

Granted but you will be able to focus only on that one task for the rest of your life.

I wish a drop dead gorgeous woman would ask me out on a date today.  :D

[Belle33]

Granted, I ask you out, but you are so bedazzled by my beauty that you fall to your death over the inconvenient cliff just behind you.  Hmmm... I lose more dates that way.

I wish my phone would not ring for the rest of the afternoon.

[Zaphod]

Granted but that's because the creepy old telephone man has cut the line and is peeping at you through the window right now.

I wish I could find my old Pink Floyd CD collection.

[Belle33]

Granted, but their all scratched.  Sorry babe - if you're nice I'll let you listen to mine.

I wish my cell phone accidentally broke and it wasn't my fault at all.

[Zaphod]

Granted but you lose all your contacts and thus all your friends in this e-world.

I wish i had a qwerty keyboard on my personal cellphone.

[rhev]

Granted but the battery is dead.

I wish I had a new car.

[Belle33]

Happy to grant that. Here are the key's and here is the bill.

I wish it didn't start raining suddenly - what happened to my beautiful day???