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Perverted Wishes

Started by Ellyssa, September 15, 2006, 11:50:39 AM

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Mathim

Granted but that's because you're in a coma so you can't feel anything, pain or otherwise.

I wish my watch could illuminate when it's dark, tell the date and would stop beeping all the time.
Considering a permanent retirement from Elliquiy, but you can find me on Blue Moon (under the same username).

dart

granted. you brought it to a watch repairs men and he made it illuminate and it can tell you the date. pluss it stopped beeping. however it is now ticking. you realize all too late that the watch repairs man was the guy who hated you guts in middle school and that he put a bomb in your watch. and as you said to him at the end of middle school, "see you next fall"

I wish I had a good wish to wish for.

Mathim

Granted, but then once you know what the wish is, it never comes true!

I wish the world was all atheists.
Considering a permanent retirement from Elliquiy, but you can find me on Blue Moon (under the same username).

Kalen

Granted.  Everyone is an athiest... then Judgement Day comes, and we ALL burn.

I wish I could be online in the evening EVERY day.

Mathim

Granted but then your butt gets stuck to your chair and you can't remove it without intensive surgery.

I wish someone would buy me that damn iPod I wanted for my birthday four months ago.
Considering a permanent retirement from Elliquiy, but you can find me on Blue Moon (under the same username).

Reed

Granted, but the only thing it plays is Veggie Tales songs.

I wish i didn't have a Veggie Tales song stuck in my head... ugh.

Kalen

No problem!  Now you have the theme from BARNEY stuck in your head.  The shotgun is in the downstairs closet.

I wish Bonds had never taken steroids, and ruined a good career.

jstarz

Granted, but he spent his career in Pittsburgh so nobody watched him.

I wish I understood how they scored people in gymnastics.

The Great Triangle

Granted.  Unfortunately, you know also know how gymnasts are made.  How they're REALLY made.


I wish I had an uncursed rustproof +2 silver dragon scale mail armor.
Meow!  I'm a kitty; made of fire.

Ons and Offs

jstarz

Granted, but it's a fake.

I wish I had a a good wish to wish.

Idej

Granted, but you are prevented from asking for that wish, for all means of communication are taken away from you.  That includes writing, speaking, morse code.  You simply can not communicate in any way, shape, or form.

I wish that I could be Superman

Josietta

Granted. But Kryptonite has spread throughout the earths crust and you are now balding with a huge beer gut and Lois left you for Batman because "he has better toys".

I wish I could make a perfect Tiramisu.

      ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜🖤🤍💖                    ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜🖤🤍💖
                                 O.Os   / A.As / Ideas 
                           Warning:  Finicky Muse Ahead!


The Great Triangle

Granted.  The tiramisu becomes self aware and launches a Jihad against humanity.  You stop it by eating it, but you are forever haunted by having eaten the perfect tiramisu.

I wish for a cursed scroll of genocide.
Meow!  I'm a kitty; made of fire.

Ons and Offs

Idej

Granted, but the scroll does a reverse effect of what you want.  If you want one group eliminated, it will eliminate the other that is the direct opposite of it.  You do not know that it will do that until you wipe out whatever the opposite of you what you wanted wiped out.

I wish to have a fully-functional Ironman suit.

The Great Triangle

Granted.  The suit becomes self aware and launches a Jihad against humanity.  You stop it by eating it, but you are forever haunted by having eaten the perfect tiramisu...  err... I mean, the perfect Iron Man suit. 


I which all video game box art was done in the style of the origonal mega man for the NES.
Meow!  I'm a kitty; made of fire.

Ons and Offs

Paradox

Not granted at all because you misspelled "wish".

Granted. Every video game character now wears yellow and blue spandex-armor on their respective boxes; unfortunately, each character is also depicted being decapitated by Cut Man.

I wish to find my "Monty Python's Meaning of Life" DVD.


"More than ever, the creation of the ridiculous is almost impossible because of the competition it receives from reality."-Robert A. Baker

MusicNeverDies

You find it, but 10 minutes in it has been burned over so you end up watching gay porn.

I wish I had more time to RP.

Kalen

After the accident, you have time and ability to do nothing BUT.

I wish I could control the passing of time.

MusicNeverDies

(.....sweet.)

Granted, however just because you could, doesn't meant you would know how. You waste most of your life trying to figure it out, then accidentally fast forward 100 years to a time when you don't exist.

I wish I could apperate.

Kalen

Your wish is my command.  You Apparate, but splinch yourself, leaving behind your WAND HAND.  Whoops.  Welcome to your destination, bleeding dangerously.

Oh, and naked.  Because that's always funny.

I wish I had no meeting today.

jstarz

Granted, but it's because you've been fired.

I wish I could turn invisible.

Idej

Granted, but when you become visible, your clothes remain invisible and you turn invisible at random times as well.

I wish that I had a living Deinonychus for a pet.

The Great Triangle

Granted.  It loves you so much that it jealously attacks anything nearby.  And thus you will always be haunted by having eaten the perfect tiramisu.

I wish the iconoclast hat was an equipable item for my class.
Meow!  I'm a kitty; made of fire.

Ons and Offs

jstarz

Granted, but it's no longer iconoclastic.

I wish I had a good roleplay idea.

Kalen

You get one.  And lose all internet, forever.  Damn.

I wish I was a better writer.