Who am I? xianxia, gender identity finding

Started by Krys, April 23, 2023, 01:20:27 PM

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Krys

The setting: a bureaucratic empire, similar to the chinese dynasties since the rule Wu Zetian (Tang, Song, Yuan and Ming) with strong patriarchal and legalistic undertones, and a concubinate and inheritance system in place. Think New Life Begins, but with some hidden xianxia elements.

My character is the young 23th son of the emperor, his mother a concubine from the provinces. Being very smart and diligent, but neither cunning nor ambitious, he has hopes to carve out a quit living for himself as an imperial scholarly bureaucrat by excelling at the imperial exames. Though even when he finishes the exams as the first in this cycle, he is informed of his lord fathers wishes to "reward" him for his success by arranging a diplomatic marriage. In essence he is forced into a marriage with a girl he doesn't know, and thereby doomed to continue the hated life at the court, becoming embroiled into his elder broethers intrigues.

All this changes, when it turns out that his supposed bride, your character, stems from a "provinicial noble family" with matriarchical customs. What neither my character, nor most of the court knows, is that said family is a mere front for a xianxia sect, whose support the emperor is trying to garner. And what better way to do so, than to give them the -young breeding bull- husband from the imperial family they are asking for? Though no such plan will go through unopposed, and thus my character is slipped a concoction by an opposing sect. A concoction that was intended to make sure that SHE isn't able to sire the expected new cultivator. A concoction that only works part of the time though, allowing my character to hold up appearance for at least some time.

What will my character do now? Will she be upset about his lost manhood, losing herself to despair? Or maybe is this allowing her, to find his own true self, one that was never allowed to show before? Will he embrance being both and neither, still find love with her new wife, happyness in a life as a cultivator? What is your position in all this, will you support your new partner in this discovery, or be bound to customs and traditions?
Disclaimer (WIP):
English isn't my native language. I'm deeply rooted in a culture with significantly different (much more direct) communcation strategies than typical for the extremely polite british or canadian cultures, or the "optimistic" approach often used in the USA. Additionally, I'm not neurotypical in several ways, warping my perception and communication to an even further degree.

But: my english is JUST good enough to lull many readers into a false sense of security. Think of it as the communicative equivalent to "false friends words" which, while extremely similar in outward appearance in two languages, mean something slightly but importantly different. Like "I want to become a steak" makes perfect sense to a german... that still would prefer not to be butchered.

So please, if you perceive my words as rude, my intentions as unemotional or just weird: ask me. I'm not always successful in my attempts to correctly guess the fluff and embellishments needed for successful communication. Not in my native german tongue, much less so in english. Please do not interpret them as bad intent, but feel free to ask for clarifications. I'll try my best to solve such misunderstandings, and learn to prevent them.