I once had this talk with a bisexual woman.

Started by Inkidu, July 21, 2008, 02:40:36 PM

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Inkidu

And it was interesting but the highlight of the conversation came at the end when we were talking about sex. She told me that nothing compares to having sex with a woman; they're tender and intimate but good God how can you live with one! I nearly asphyxiated from lack of oxygen.
She went on to say that she just didn't know how guys did it, and I just shrugged because frankly I didn't know either.
If you're searching the lines for a point, well you've probably missed it; there was never anything there in the first place.

Mathim

Conversations with bi or gay/lesbian people are so fascinating. I mean, it's a perspective everyone is usually so afraid to explore, that it's completely new when you hear about it. My best friend Michael is gay and I met him during graveyard shift a couple of years ago; I was working at a gas station at night and he's a limo driver whose company gassed up at our station since their garage was half a block away from us. He and all the other drivers would come in for free donuts and coffee and I'd gotten to be pretty good friends with all of them, and then one day Michael told me he was gay and I never would have known that. I mean, I'm sure we all know the stereotypes about gays dressing the part or acting/speaking flamboyantly but he really threw me for a loop. He's really into knives and guns, his place is constantly a total mess, and he drives like a maniac (in a good way) so it was really refreshing becoming friends with him, I've learned a lot and I'm glad I'm more enlightened now about people and how they live their lives. I'm not gay and I've never do it with a man, but I'm not bothered by the idea of people doing that with each other, now that I understand that it's not a choice, it's something someone is born with. So now it makes me sick when people display such prejudice and ignorance about the subject. And come to think of it, the only people I've met who haven't been rude or nasty to me, were all gay people.
Considering a permanent retirement from Elliquiy, but you can find me on Blue Moon (under the same username).

Inkidu

Sucks when you can't fall back on stereotypes sometimes, and other times it rocks.
If you're searching the lines for a point, well you've probably missed it; there was never anything there in the first place.

Mathim

Quote from: Inkedu on July 24, 2008, 01:21:52 PM
Sucks when you can't fall back on stereotypes sometimes, and other times it rocks.

Stereotypes aren't that funny. Sometimes they are...but some people take them too seriously and that's called prejudice.

Although, I did discuss a funny saying with my gay friend: "It's not a stereotype if it's true."
Considering a permanent retirement from Elliquiy, but you can find me on Blue Moon (under the same username).

ZK

My mother could agree with your friend... then again, she has a habit of picking the most insane psychopaths out there, regardless of gender. O.O
On's/Off's --- Game Reviews

"Only the insane have strength enough to prosper. Only those who prosper may judge what is sane."

ShrowdedPoet

Well, I'm bi and I'll tell you my take on gay, lesbo, and bi.  Gays and lesbians form close bonds with their partners of the same sex.  They believe in love and that love doesn't descriminate.  Bi's, myself included, that I've known and spoke with don't form close bonds usually.  And they really see those of the same sex as sex figures.  That's it, no love there just lust.  And a good deal of bisexual people I've talked to and known don't believe in real love between same sex. . .just two cents. . .not saying it's right for everyone. . .just saying what I've seen and felt. . .no flaming please.
Kiss the hand that beats you.
Sexuality isn't a curse, it's a gift to embrace and explore!
Ons and Offs


Bliss

For the sake of not flaming and making huge arguments, I'll just state that my personal experience has differed greatly from ShrowdedPoet's. :)
O/O ~ Wiki ~ A/A ~ Discord: Bliss#0337
I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing.
Only I will remain.
<3 <3 <3

ShrowdedPoet

Quote from: Bliss on July 25, 2008, 10:23:20 AM
For the sake of not flaming and making huge arguments, I'll just state that my personal experience has differed greatly from ShrowdedPoet's. :)

;D  Reason for the disclaimer. . .I can only speak from experience. . .
Kiss the hand that beats you.
Sexuality isn't a curse, it's a gift to embrace and explore!
Ons and Offs


Paradox

This thread is already flaming enough.

*cymbal shot*

I think it all depends on the couple and why they decided that being bisexual was the lifestyle for them. Once you're in a committed relationship, it doesn't really matter if you're bisexual, unless it's one of those "open" relationships.


"More than ever, the creation of the ridiculous is almost impossible because of the competition it receives from reality."-Robert A. Baker

ShrowdedPoet

I'm still aloud to have relations with women. . .I'm married. . .but our relationship isn't technically "open".
Kiss the hand that beats you.
Sexuality isn't a curse, it's a gift to embrace and explore!
Ons and Offs


Paradox

Is he allowed to have relations with other women as well?


Just for clarification: You're allowed to sleep around, so please explain how it isn't an open relationship. Is it half-way open, standing partially ajar, riddled with cracks..?


"More than ever, the creation of the ridiculous is almost impossible because of the competition it receives from reality."-Robert A. Baker

ShrowdedPoet

Quote from: Paradox on July 25, 2008, 10:37:37 AM
Is he allowed to have relations with other women as well?


Just for clarification: You're allowed to sleep around, so please explain how it isn't an open relationship. Is it half-way open, standing partially ajar, riddled with cracks..?

no he's not. . .and I'm not allowed with other men. . .and he doesn't desire other men. . .I'm the only person he's ever had sex with. . .so I guess it's a-jar. . .
Kiss the hand that beats you.
Sexuality isn't a curse, it's a gift to embrace and explore!
Ons and Offs


Sherona

Quote from: ShrowdedPoet on July 25, 2008, 09:46:34 AM
Well, I'm bi and I'll tell you my take on gay, lesbo, and bi.  Gays and lesbians form close bonds with their partners of the same sex.  They believe in love and that love doesn't descriminate.  Bi's, myself included, that I've known and spoke with don't form close bonds usually.  And they really see those of the same sex as sex figures.  That's it, no love there just lust.  And a good deal of bisexual people I've talked to and known don't believe in real love between same sex. . .just two cents. . .not saying it's right for everyone. . .just saying what I've seen and felt. . .no flaming please.

This is not a flame, just a difference of opinion (one can disagree and explain wtihout flaming)

I am uncomfortable with your use of the term "They". That implies atleast Most, as it is a term I think that is used to encompass a whole group.

Your the first even remotely 'gay' individual that I have heard say that Bi-sexual or any other non-heterosexual preferences can not form an emotional bond. To be honest, i hear that from the conservatives who claim Same Sex marriages threaten the institution of marriage because "Homosexuals do not form emotional bonds and are in fact not able to have a long term committed relationship."

I think exact opposite. I know MANY MANY bisexual people who are in committed same-sex relationships as well as opposite-sex...they just still find the same sex attractive but they do not feel the need to engage...or they do and they are happily polyamorous. Both are healthy and good for the relationships as long as the SO are communicated with. But to say that bi-sexuals can't form an emotional bond is a bit of a stretch imo.

Paradox

I'm one of those conservatives that Sherona mentioned; however, even I believe that gay folks can form emotional bonds with each other. Polyamorous relationships and similar arrangements are statistically more common among gays and even more so among bisexuals, but since it's a different lifestyle in general from heterosexuality, it's natural for the forms of commitment to be different as well. I admit that I have a tendency to think of bisexuals as hedonistic pleasure seekers who want attention/gratification from anywhere they can get it, but that's a view based on my own experience with specific bisexuals. At the risk of pissing Sherona off, 'they' (meaning bisexuals) are just as human as the rest of us, so they have the same feelings, emotional stirrings, attachment-forming habits, psychological tendencies, etc. that mankind in general has. Love and it's cousins among the emotions are universal to both genders and any sexual orientation...it's basic human nature. How it manifests varies wildly among person to person and especially group to group, but the core emotion is the same.


"More than ever, the creation of the ridiculous is almost impossible because of the competition it receives from reality."-Robert A. Baker

Sherona

How would stating what I just said,

Quote'they' (meaning bisexuals) are just as human as the rest of us, so they have the same feelings, emotional stirrings, attachment-forming habits, psychological tendencies, etc. that mankind in general has. Love and it's cousins among the emotions are universal to both genders and any sexual orientation...it's basic human nature. How it manifests varies wildly among person to person and especially group to group, but the core emotion is the same.

piss me off?

Paradox

I didn't think it sounded all that similar to what you just said.


I was using the pronoun "they", which you had just said you're uncomfortable with.


"More than ever, the creation of the ridiculous is almost impossible because of the competition it receives from reality."-Robert A. Baker

Sherona

*smiles*

I thought I was trying to say that they can form emotional bonds etc and so forth..I hope it came out that way..

Paradox

Oh, of course, don't worry. It definitely came out that way. I simply meant that the way I was trying to make the way I expressed it different from the way you did. When I first joined the site, I remember being ridiculed for using the "some of my friends are gay" point in one of my arguments, so I tried to avoid it. You seem to use it successfully.


"More than ever, the creation of the ridiculous is almost impossible because of the competition it receives from reality."-Robert A. Baker

Sherona

Quote from: Paradox on July 25, 2008, 12:10:08 PM
Oh, of course, don't worry. It definitely came out that way. I simply meant that the way I was trying to make the way I expressed it different from the way you did. When I first joined the site, I remember being ridiculed for using the "some of my friends are gay" point in one of my arguments, so I tried to avoid it. You seem to use it successfully.

The reason that it was scoffed at when you used it is because it seemed that you were trying to excuse your thoughts using that. I have very close friends who are gay and bisexuals, but i don't use that as an excuse to say stuff that might be hurtful (not saying you were saying hurtful things)

Its like saying I can call african american people the N- word because I have african american friends.

Sherona

I should add, that was how it was percieved at the time Paradox, it was before people got to get to know you *smiles*


/end hijack

Paradox

I concede your point, but for future reference:

Quote from: Sherona on July 25, 2008, 12:13:35 PM
I don't use that as an excuse to say stuff that might be hurtful (not saying you were saying hurtful things)

You don't need to put a disclaimer in parentheses when we talk. I know the things I said were unintentionally hurtful to some people. Calling me out on previous actions is fine. I won't shirk responsibility or try to downplay what I did.


"More than ever, the creation of the ridiculous is almost impossible because of the competition it receives from reality."-Robert A. Baker

Sherona

Quote from: Paradox on July 25, 2008, 12:17:42 PM
I concede your point, but for future reference:

You don't need to put a disclaimer in parentheses when we talk. I know the things I said were unintentionally hurtful to some people. Calling me out on previous actions is fine. I won't shirk responsibility or try to downplay what I did.

*hugs you* You are so mature Para, I wanna be like you when I grow up....without the dangly bits..

Paradox

Aw thank you Sherona! I always enjoy our discussions. Unlike many I've seen, they rarely degenerate into name-calling, anger, and arguments based on emotion.

It's the dangly bits that make things interesting.


Sorry for taking things so far off track. I'd forgotten that this is a Comedy Corner thread.


"More than ever, the creation of the ridiculous is almost impossible because of the competition it receives from reality."-Robert A. Baker

ShrowdedPoet

Quote from: Sherona on July 25, 2008, 11:47:48 AM
This is not a flame, just a difference of opinion (one can disagree and explain wtihout flaming)

I am uncomfortable with your use of the term "They". That implies atleast Most, as it is a term I think that is used to encompass a whole group.

Your the first even remotely 'gay' individual that I have heard say that Bi-sexual or any other non-heterosexual preferences can not form an emotional bond. To be honest, i hear that from the conservatives who claim Same Sex marriages threaten the institution of marriage because "Homosexuals do not form emotional bonds and are in fact not able to have a long term committed relationship."

I think exact opposite. I know MANY MANY bisexual people who are in committed same-sex relationships as well as opposite-sex...they just still find the same sex attractive but they do not feel the need to engage...or they do and they are happily polyamorous. Both are healthy and good for the relationships as long as the SO are communicated with. But to say that bi-sexuals can't form an emotional bond is a bit of a stretch imo.

I was using the word they to mean those whom I've had contact with.  I'm in no way conservative and I didn't say they couldn't form emotional bonds.  There's a differnece between that and love.  But anyway. . .again just what I have seen. . .that's all I can speak for.
Kiss the hand that beats you.
Sexuality isn't a curse, it's a gift to embrace and explore!
Ons and Offs


Sherona

QuoteThat's it, no love there just lust.  And a good deal of bisexual people I've talked to and known don't believe in real love between same sex

Thats wher I got that you said they don't feel love.

Anyway, thats all I really have to say. I can not imagine not feeling a bond with someone.