Math

[Paradox]

Elliquians,

I'm not a Math expert, nor even a Mathematics aficionado, so could y'all help me figure out how the hell this works? I've tried a ton of different combinations, yet none work (assuming you don't lie and say your birthday has or hasn't already passed if that's not true).

[Jude]

It's a modular arithmetic trick.  Details in an edit in a second.

Basically, the instructions can be reduced to this pseudo-equation:

[(Masturbatex2 + 5)*50 + 1760/1759 - Birthyear] % 100

(where %100 is basically "give me the remainder after dividing by 100," i.e. the last 2 numbers)

Start by foiling the 50 to masturbate and 5 and you get

[Masturbatex100 + 250 + 1760/1759 - Birthyear] % 100

Now, 250 + 1760/1759 is just 2010 (or 2009 if you haven't had your birthday yet this year).  2010/2009 - Birthyear is your age.  Thus you end up with:

[Masturbatex100 + Your Age] %100

Because masturbate is multiplied by 100, that part of it will always cancel out.  So as long as you are not over 100, you will get the proper answer of Your Age.

EDIT:  By the way, step 7 is wrong.  If you masturbate more than 10 times a week, you will not get a 3 digit number.  And of course the whole thing is inaccurate for people over the age of 99 no matter what.

EDIT2:  First edit was partially wrong, step 1 asks how many days per week you masturbate, so it's OK.

[Oniya]

Elliquians,

I'm not a Math expert, nor even a Mathematics aficionado, so could y'all help me figure out how the hell this works? I've tried a ton of different combinations, yet none work (assuming you don't lie and say your birthday has or hasn't already passed if that's not true).

Letting x = 'number of times you fap' and y='your age at the end of 2010' (to get around the 'if your birthday has already passed' thing)

X	Number of times you fap
2X	Multiply by 2
2x+5	add 5
50(2X+5)	multiply by 50
50(2x+5)+1760	Add 1760
50(2x+5)+1760-(2010-y)	Subtract the four-digit number of the year you were born (i.e., this year, minus your age)
100x+250+1760-(2010-y)	At this point, I'm doing the math: multiplying out the first part...
100x+2010-(2010-y)	...doing the addition (you can see where the 'random' 1760 comes from - this won't work next year)...
100x+2010-2010+y	...distributing the negative...
100x+0+y	...adding up the integers...
100x+y	...dropping the 0

This guarantees that you'll have two zeros at the end of the number for your age to fit into.

[Trieste]

The widget appears not to work for me. :/

[Oniya]

I had to do a copy-paste of the url after quoting.

[Beguile's Mistress]

The image link is really crazy.  When I didn't see it I clicked Quote then copied it and pasted it in a new tab, got a bunch of stuff that didn't mean anything, clicked the drop down menu for the address bar and then got the image.  Then when I clicked back the image was in the post!

Almost as much fun to figure out as the math! ;D

[Trieste]

Yeah, when it didn't work for me I copypasted the link into a new browser window, but got an error about a server move and their main site, looks like.

[mystictiger]

Yeah, when it didn't work for me I copypasted the link into a new browser window, but got an error about a server move and their main site, looks like.

That suggests you fap waaay too much!

[Trieste]

I reject your estimation of 'too much' and replace it with 'not enough'.